A Letter from Alex to Kasia
#2 of The Way to a Man's Heart
Written not long after the events in The Way to a Man's Heart.
A Letter from Alex to Kasia
(No one is allowed to take credit for this work apart from me. If you want to use it somehow, I would appreciate it if you were to get in touch with me first.)
(Read and enjoy. This can be thought of as a sequel to The Way to A Man's Heart, but not necessarily.)
Suggested Music: L' Âme Immortelle: Will You?
Suggested Drinks: Tea
Suggested Eats: None
Suggested Smokes: Don't smoke! It's bad for you!
When we met the first time, it wasn't at a very special time or place. It was just class... just the first class of the fall 2011 semester at Warszawa University. When I walked in, I barely noticed you... I figured that you were just another overly studious kid looking to get an edge on the class. Just like me.
I guess I was right, wasn't I? We studied so much that semester. For the midterms, and the finals, and pretty much everything in between, too. But it was worth it, wasn't it? I pulled a 4.0 that semester, so I know that you did too, because... it's hard to admit it, but I have to be honest, Kasia: you're a lot smarter than I am.
It's true. You study hard, no doubt about that, but there were times in class when I'd be confused out of my mind, and I'll look over to see you nodding as if whatever's being explained is the simplest thing in the world. It's kind of scary in some ways, and--not to be a racist, but I would have always guessed that a Praha boy like me would be able to think laps around some country Pole like you.
It never turned out like that, though. We're intellectual equals... at the best of times. In general, Kasia, you're smarter than me. You're smarter than I'll ever be, and I love you for it.
I guess it runs in the family. Your parents never got the chance to get much education, but when I talk to them, I can tell that they're both closeted geniuses. And then there's Krystian, of course. He's only just finished his first semester, but he got a 4.0 while playing basketball, while studying for a double major. He's really going to go places. He's modest, too, just like you, but... there's no doubt about it. He's going to go places. We keep in touch a lot, and... at this point, I'd say that he's like a brother to me, but that might make Kris jealous, so I'll just say that he's almost like a brother to me, but not quite.
And Kris is doing well. He might not be the genius that Krystian is, but he's a good guy, though I don't know what he hopes to gain by going to America. Aren't Polska and our own country big enough?
As far as me... well, I'm okay, I suppose. I stopped working out for a while, but you know that, so...
I'm working out again, though. I don't lift weights very often, but last week, I deadlifted 300 kilos for the first time in... I don't know how long. My bench is pretty good, too, I guess... but mostly, I run these days. I run, and bike, and sometimes, I go flying.
Oh, yeah, I forgot to tell you, I finally got my pilot's license. Don't worry, I haven't crashed yet, and I never will, because no matter what you say, Kasia, the stats are clear: flying is pretty safe. And it's fun--even more fun that biking--and then there's that feeling of being just free, and above everything, and invincible...
I don't know. There's an allure to it, I suppose.
But I use your bike a lot too, I hope you don't mind. It's only when I go to visit your family, though. I'll just ride around your hometown, or around eastern Polska. Or sometimes I'll just find a quiet place and sit there, and try to imagine how you felt when you used to ride your bike.
Maybe you felt the same as I do when I fly.
Kasia, I... have never found it easy to really say what I feel. You know that. And it's not because I don't know how to say what I feel, it's because most of the time, I don't know how I feel. It took me four years to learn that the feeling I got when I looked at you for the first time, that desire I got to just hold you and run my hands through your hair... it took me four years to realize that I love you, Kasia.
Since then, I've gotten better at saying what I feel, so... here's what I feel right now, only a few hundred words into the letter.
I love you, Kasia.
And I miss you.
(No planning, no thinking, no roadmap--this piece was pure emotion. Let me know how you think I did.)