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Nervously, she stepped closer. Her hands held close, fumbling her fingers together, her eyes locked onto me. "I'm sorry about the last time we met. I wish I hadn't left so quickly." She stepped closer and carefully placed a hand on the table in front of me. "I know things are different, but I couldn't help but feel like I wasn't there when you needed me."

I lightly placed my left foot on her hand, gripping two of her fingers, trying anything to tell her it was okay. She brought her other hand to the back of my head and ran her fingers through my feathers. Closing my eyes, I leaned into her hand, turning my head to rest my beak on her palm.

"When this all started, I was in denial," Mom started to say, "I couldn't imagine this happening to my son. It couldn't have been real. But as you kept changing, it hurt to see my only son disappear." She paused. "I wasn't there to be your mother. You found your friends and moved in with them. By the time I realized how far you had changed, I had waited too long and could only say goodbye." Mom's face turned red, and she pulled her hand away to cover her eyes. "I wasn't even there when you left. I couldn't bring myself to watch what was left of my son fly away. Matthew called me and told me about your little speech. You were happy."

The door opened, and Elizabeth started to walk in. Upon seeing my Mom, she carefully closed the door. Mom uncovered her face and brought both arms around me. She pulled me off my feet and held me against her chest. My head rested against her neck.

"When I heard you came back, I wanted to pretend it wasn't real. I thought my son was gone. But Elizabeth said that you were still you. I don't know if that made it better or worse. Then she mentioned your broken wing and that there was a chance you wouldn't recover. I had to see my baby boy again. Even if you were upset with me, I had to do it right this time." She held me like a baby, but using one arm, she lowered herself to the floor; sitting on the cold, hard tile, she leaned her back against the metal wall of the table.

"I thought everything was going well. You seemed happy to see me, and I learned that my boy was still here. I never wanted to let you go. I tried getting Elizabeth to help me prepare your room for your new body." Mom laughed through her tears. "But she assured me you would be alright. You were happy out there, alone. I couldn't imagine you being alone, as friendly as you are, out in those woods. I was trying to come up with ways to steal you from here; I thought maybe they were telling you that you would be happier." She took a deep breath, "Then I heard about her. I heard about your children. You had grown up without me. I missed my grandchildren being born because I couldn't accept that you were changing," Her voice grew more shaky.

I hadn't thought much about what was happening in my life while I was gone. Everything seemed natural, regular things to happen to a bird. I hunted and found shelter from the weather. I had my good days and my bad days. Planned for the winter and found a companion—everything a human would have shared with others. To me, it was how it would be, and that's just how it was. I never thought much more about it.

"If it weren't for your friends, you would have been alone. No one going through that deserves to do it alone." Her words echoed in my mind. I had been there for Damien, Benji, and Matthew. The entire house was supportive when my time came, but what about Alex and... I didn't want to think about it. Alex had Elizabeth, and Eli wanted it that way.

Mom loosened her grip on me, "Can you promise me something?" She held me out so I could see her face. "I know you have- want to go back, but this time it won't be a 'goodbye'?"

I nodded, and immediately, she pulled me back tight again. Although I was happy to know my Mom was alright, my mind couldn't help but dwell on her words. I didn't know she had any regrets about how things went, but now, I couldn't help but feel some of my own. I would have to take them to the grave.

"You are more than what your body looks like; you are not just some hawk, but my son. You are Lyall; that name is the most important thing your father and I have ever given you. Nothing can ever take that away." She ran her hand through the feathers on my back, and I couldn't help but close my eyes. When I opened them, I was met with a hazy reflection of myself on the side of the table. It was enough to see the face of a hawk, my face. I may not remember what I looked like as a human, but I was alright with that; I could even say I was happy with it.

Mom stood up and carefully placed me on the table. She brushed off her pants and smiled at me, her face still red. "I'm sorry, I should treat you like the adult you are. But it's hard when it's so easy to pick you up like when you were a baby." Hearing that embarrassed me a little. I would have been blushing if my cheeks weren't covered in feathers. I turned to fix the feathers on my back and saw Alex in the corner of my vision. I had forgotten she was still in the room, and I was probably more embarrassed knowing she had heard my mother's spiel. She was quiet, and after looking at her for a few moments, she sauntered to the door and left.

"Is she okay?" Mom asked. I never gave a response and could only watch the door.

"You two are close, aren't you?" she motioned to the door. "Elizabeth tries to help, but even she says that Alex connects better with you and the folks in that house. You all get each other. It's good to have friends like that." Mom held her arm down to me, "Why don't we go check on her?" I reluctantly stepped onto her arm, careful with my talons not to scratch her skin. She walked us to the door and out to the hall, where we found Alex and Elizabeth.

Alex had her back turned to us with her wings covering her face. Elizabeth was rubbing her hand down her back when she saw us. Her face looked worried, and she motioned her head to the owl. I made a quiet squawk, and Alex turned to look at me. She wiped her face once more and turned towards us. We then saw more feathers covering her body. Almost no skin was visible down to her scaley feet.

"I feel like I'm standing on the edge... I'm so close to..." Alex didn't finish the sentence.

"You look beautiful, Alex." Mom tried to comfort Alex, but it didn't help.

Elizabeth put her arm around her, "And what if it does happen? I'm right here for you, and everything is going to be okay. We've planned for this and know what to do, right?"

Alex nodded in response to Elizabeth. "I know, it's still scary though. I- I don't want to be alone when it happens." Alex struggled to say.

"And you won't be alone. Whenever it happens, I promise I'll be there. I won't leave this place without you, Alex." Elizabeth stared into Alex's eyes.

"Why don't we go into the room and sit down for a bit? Maybe a little sit down could help with the nerves?" Mom suggested. Elizabeth nodded and started to guide Alex back into the room. As Elizabeth passed Mom, she asked if she needed her to grab me. "No, I can carry my boy," Mom said happily.

We sat around the table and chattered for a while, at least those of us who could. Mom was very interested in hearing more about Alex, not about her changes but everything else about her. Alex seemed to enjoy talking about anything but her changes. Not often did I see her open up like she did. Elizabeth offered to order dinner so that everyone could stay later. When the food arrived, we moved to the front lounge, not wanting to disturb the animals; it tended to be quieter anyway.

"So, Lyall, has your wing been doing you well?" Elizabeth asked. I didn't want to mention the seemingly random numbness I experienced. It seemed to be happening less and less, but it still worried me. I lied and nodded my head. "We didn't know if you would ever fly again. Breaking a wing like that is not a good outlook. Thanks to Alex and Eli for the extra work on strengthening your wings."

"You would have been well taken care of otherwise," Mom quickly said.

Elizabeth chuckled. "You would have been papered beyond belief."

"Good thing you healed up. Who else would be there to take care of the little ones?" Mom said jokingly. I didn't know if she was joking or didn't know how hawks raise their young, but they had left the nest a long time ago.

"Did you name them?" she asked quieter.

I hesitated before slowly shaking my head.

"Yeah... I guess it is a little different out there, isn't it?" She half chuckled to herself. "Maybe one day I'll get to meet one of them. You never know."

It was getting late when everything began to wrap up. Mom was reluctant to go, but she ensured I knew she would be there when I was released, as Elizabeth and Alex would tell her when it was time. As she went to leave, she leaned down and kissed the top of my head.

"You may have grown up, but you are never too old for your Mom. I'll see you soon, Lyall." She said before the door shut behind her. It was warming to know that she wasn't upset, maybe a little confused, but that was okay. She meant the best.

"Alex, do you want to sleep here tonight, or should we both go to my house?" Elizabeth asked.

Alex looked back at me before answering, "I'll sleep here tonight if that's okay."

Elizabeth nodded, "I'll stay here then. I promised I wouldn't leave you alone."

Alex shrugged, "I'll be alright tonight. I have Lyall here with me. I think I have it a little better under control now."

"Are you sure? I don't mind staying here if you want me here," Elizabeth asked.

"We'll be alright. We have each other, right Lyall?"

I nodded.

"In that case, I think I'm going to head home. If, for whatever reason, you need me, press one on the phone, and it'll call me. No reason is too small. Okay?" Elizabeth said sternly.

"We've got this," Alex laughed.

Elizabeth left, and Alex went around shutting the lights off, leaving the emergency lights on in the room so that I could at least see some. She kicked back on the chair and tucked her head under her wing. I looked around before taking my place on the chair next to her. Following suit, I tucked my head under my own wing.

My dream was happy, an odd sensation for once. I felt like I was back outside and flying over my meadow. The warm sun heated my feathers, and the clean air carried me across the field—no pain in my wing and not a worry in the world. The people below seemed cheerful, and the families spent time outdoors on a beautiful day. I found my nest to be standing in the same tree. I carefully landed on it, and not long after, another hawk landed. It surprised me to see that it was my mate. I was worried she had moved on from me after I was gone for so long.

“Lyall..."

I looked around for the source of the sound. It was distant but clear. I dismissed it as just a thought and turned back to her.

"Lyall... wake up," the voice called again. I looked around and saw nothing again, but when I turned back to my mate, her beak opened, and I heard the voice coming from her.

"Lyall!"

My eyes shot open to see Alex standing over me. She was sobbing and shaking as she yelled my name again. "Lyall! It's..." she stopped and tilted her head back. "It's back! I can't stop it! I think this is it! What do I do!?" she yelled.

I drowsily jumped to my feet and looked around. It was still dark outside, but I could see Alex's face slowly changing further. Her voice was filled with fear, and her words slowly became more challenging to understand.

"Wha... Wha do I dooo?" Her voice shifted to a hoot at the end.

I jumped to the floor and brought myself under her wing. Using her wing, she pulled me in close. I could feel her body shaking in fear.

"Lyall, is it going to hurt when the changes finish?" I could feel her changes surge, and she let out a scared hoot.

I shook my head 'no,' but it wasn't going to change what was happening now.