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Under the cloudy night, Sam ran as hard as he could, tonight was one of those painful nights where missing Yu had become unbearable. Yu had left a few months prior to work in the mountains of faraway Dalwa. With how remote the villages were, the rabbit could only call Sam every 3 days for a cruelly short span of 15 minutes, sometimes agonizingly once every 5 days instead. The wolf grimaced, he should've left his job and accompanied Yu, or at least made more effort to dissuade him from leaving, but the rabbit would hear none of it. Sam recalled the promise he made to Yu.

'Sammy.' _Yu's soft paws cradled his muzzle, rose-pink eyes staring intentedly into his own. _

_'_I need to do this...on my own. It's my calling.'

'But...'

the rabbit sighed, leaning up and touching his forehead to Sam's own, smiling sadly.

' And as much as I want you there with me ,I don't want you to sacrifice everything you've worked so hard for since that day, okay? '

'But...'

'No buts.' Uh oh...Yu just put on that steely stare. His tail drooped in defeat.

_'_Fine...mmph!'

He wagged in surprise as felt the rabbit's lips against his.

'Good boy.'

And here he was now, pining and worrying for him. Stupid, stupid, stupid! Sam growled and picked up the pace.

***

It was at least 3 years ago, Sam recalled, as he passing by an empty bar.

He got dumped by Kaylee, that two-timing bitch, about to be kicked out of college, and still couldn't find a job. So, it was another great evening to drink away his troubles at home...except it wasn't his home, per se, he was couch surfing with his longtime childhood friend, Yu.

'Sam, that's enough.'

'What, guy can't have a drink after a rough day?'

'That's what you've been saying this past week.'

Yu sighed, exasperated, and snatched the IPA from him.

'No more, dumbass. I'm not going to let you drink your life away anymore.'

'I DON'T HAVE A DRINKING PROBLEM'

Sam snarled, foamy spittle flying as he lunged at the rabbit. Yu snatching away his seventh beer was the last straw- life was a shitshow, but it was *his* shitshow, and he sure as hell wasn't going to let anyone else run it, especially the self-righteous prick in front of him.

Yu's suddenly disappeared from view and the wolf found himself headlong on the carpet. 'You little shi- Aaargh,' He tossed about in agony, eyes burning from the cheap hooch the rabbit baptized him with. He heard a thunk while in agonizing blindness, and felt the shock of the frigid beer bottle on his foot.

'Get up'.

Through beery and searing eyes he saw the hateful shortass advancing on him. Growling, he swiped at the rabbit, struggling to stand. Again, the small rabbit dodged the wild swing, stopping inches away from the wolf who faltered, sobering up immediately when he saw the rabbit's expression. It was scarily blank, no glare or frown, just an emotionless mask. He seething blood iced over, the only other time he saw Yu's like this was when sensei and the other adults had to pull the young levret off a hulking teenaged judoka who had been picking on Sam...just as almost as scary as the accident...the one where Yu abandoned him. His blood melted swiftly, boiling away his fear. He was a hulking wolf now, goddamnit, not a scared, dumbass pup! He snarled, swaying as he snapped at Yu.

'It's my fucking life..fuck off!'

The rabbit didn't flinch at Sam's bared fangs, and stood his ground, face still blank. Sam's anger dissipated at once and that icy fear gripped him again. Sam backed away and pressed up against the cool wall, tail wrapped between his legs. Yu's crimson eyes pinned him there, hardly blinking, breath calm and still. Sam's broad back dug further into the drywall with an audible cracking-he was terrified, there was just something in that stare that highly unnerved him. He couldn't look away now, that would mean he'd lost, so he steeled himself to stare at that emotionless ruby gaze...and saw his reflection, a hulking wolf, drunk, cowering and helpless like a cub...just like when...when his parents died that nig-. Sam yelped, cowering against the wall, crying and flailing at the rabbit to chase him away.

'Fuck off, fuck off!'

Yu agilely dodged all of his blows, but was grazed by a claw. Ignoring the wolf's panicked yelping, his ivory cheek now gashed and bleeding, Yu's eerie gaze bore through the wolf , never blinking. Yu paused, inhaling deeply as he bent his knees and drew up his arms. The next time he spoke, his voice was terse and chilly.

'Then fucking get up and get. past. me.'

Sam snapped, years of frustration, shame and sadness boiling over into a strangled, rageful roar and he charged at the rabbit, fearsome jaws agape. Time unfolded languidly in the next few seconds. As their eyes met, Yu's expression broke into grief as he ducked down, grasped the wolf's outstretched arms, and yelled as he flung the wolf overhead, a powerful, sad cry that tore through their home and Sam's heart.

*KAAAAH!'

The apartment shook. Sam wheezed for air, back searing as fireworks, stars and spots twirled in his vision. Then he threw up, and threw up some more as he was turned onto his side. He heard faint sobbing, and then felt something hot splash on his locked arm. His eyes rolled upwards, and saw Yu tower over him, holding his arm in a judo lock, tears mingling with the blood from his cheek and dripping onto Sam's arm.

' Why, Sammy...just..why?'

There it was, 'Sammy', that old, embarrassing nickname Yu called him.

'How did you end up like this?! '

'Ss..hut up, *wheeze* you don't fucking know me...'

Sam yelped as the rabbit tightened his grip.

'Yes I do, dumbass!'

Yu released him, and fell to his knees, sobbing.

'Yes I do, since we were kids...remember ?!'

Flashes of childhood hang outs, adventures in their neighbourhood and being carried home over Yu's back exploded across his mind.

He recalled the scent of strawberries as Yu hugged him tightly after he got lost at the park...

'You dummy, why're you crying? I' m here, Sammy, I'm right here'

Yu's electric smile the day he won the local kids' judo championship...

'Sammy, you did it!'

The determined ruby gaze Yu gave him, left eye bruised after saving the wolf from some high school thugs.

'I'll protect you no matter what, I prom-, no I swear it'

But Yu didn't. Yu wasn't around to comfort him after the accident. Neither was he there to protect him like always when his relatives abused him, nor comfort him from the recurring nightmares from that hellish night his parents died. Now here was the traitor 7 years later lecturing him about his life choices 'for his own good'.

'THEN WHERE THE FUCK WERE *YOU* WHEN I NEEDED YOU,' roared Sam, choking back the tears and bile.

'Sam-'

'WHERE THE FUCK WERE YOU WHEN DAD AND MOM DIED? DIDN'T YOU SAY YOU'D PROTECT ME, BE BY MY SIDE,'

Yu bit his own lip, silent and nodding.

'NOW YOU COME BACK INTO MY LIFE LIKE NOTHING HAPPENED, AND START TAKING CONTROL OF M-'

'IT'S NOT LIKE THAT!'

The small rabbit burst out, quivering as the ring above the notch on his left ear jingled gently.

'It's not like that, not like that at all, dumbass... I ...we tried to find you after the accident...but we weren't allowed to contact your relatives or go near your new house after! Your uncle and aunt didn't allow us!'

'Wh-'

There was a rattling sob.

'We...*I* was so worried for you, I kept searching, looking for you, to find out if you were okay'

'Yu...'

'...and when I finally do...'

Yu bawled, falling onto Sam, embracing him despite the reek of vomit.

'I'm sorry, Sammy, so, so sorry...'

The wolf was still reeling in shock...so Yu didn't abandon him at all...it was that goddamn old bitch and her fucking henpecked husband. . .

'It's all my fault that you ended up like this, I couldn't protect you.''

'No...you're right...'

Sam lifted up his muscular arm, shielding his eyes as burning tears welled up and scorched down his face. All those days of drinking, regret and partying...that was his own goddamn fault, and here Yu didn't abandon him...he was just taking it out on his best friend.

'It was all me being an asshole...I...damnit, I'm the one who's sorry.'

***

A stray moonbeam pierced through the clouds, catching on the tears that streaked down Sam's face as he picked up the pace, faster, and deeper into the night.