The World We Live In: Chapter 5
So here's Chapter 5.
It's mostly conversations about what happened in chapter 4. I'm not sure if it is good, but I'll try to make it enjoyable.
Enjoy!
Twisted
The news of the freetown burning spread throughout the region, and opened a new panic towards the Fa’ars. Though Narati wasn’t mentioned or even described (only referred to as ‘a Fa’ar’), they were convinced that Fa’ars were more than a thief and liar, but was also capable of causing chaos that was commonly associated with other humanoids. His notoriety was even amplified by the hatred caused by the former slaves of the slaver that was killed by him, as they claimed that Narati killed their master without provocation and burned the freetown like a ‘crazy fucker’. Their hatred was unjustified, since there’s no such thing as ‘law’, and in the end those slaves were ‘claimed’ by other slavers, and nothing ever came out from that.
Slaves trying to justify their master’s actions were not uncommon in the wasteland. Many slavers were not stereotypically ruthless and abusive. The reason the slaves came to them for protection was because of the protection promised by them, which was something rare. Not all slavers were abusive. Many even readily help them without question, giving them a choice for life and even helping in stores. Though the slaver that Narati killed was undeniably racist and abusive, it wasn’t so for the slaves. In the prewar society, this psychological phenomenon was very well-known.
Even then, in the midst of the chaos caused by Narati, the wanderers had their own problem in the form of Narati himself. Some times after they travelled far from the freetown, Narati, who silently wept and shed tears, finally broke down by wailing as loud as he could. Jek and Raine had been expecting this reaction, seeing how his weak psyche was before he even started the stunt. Everything he showed when he killed the slaver and possibly kill people still inside the house he burned disappeared as he wailed and move towards Jek, wanting protection from anything. Jek was visibly troubled and for the first time in his life, empathized with the despairing rat.
Even if he had logged countless kills with his explosives, a 15-year-old consciously killing a slaver and a broken lionman, then proceeded to burn a house down, was too much for him. Even if the house was full of rapists and cannibals, the fact that it was done by a 15-year-old Fa’ar was too much to handle for the weak-hearted and cowardly person like the Fa’ar.
Both the veteran hunters waited Narati to cry to his heart’s content, until he went to sleep due to exhaustion. During that time, Raine had started making camp, and silently took Narati away from Jek, who proceeded to discard his old clothes for a fresh one he bought some times ago.
As they looked at Narati’s shivering body and tears trickling down his eyes, Raine started a heartfelt conversation that was unlike his nurturing and cheerful conversation. They were not in the mood for such.
“Poor kid…he’s not even an adult, but he did everything as if it was justified,” said Raine. “I knew an arsonist once, and he had clearly lost it, but Narati…he’s too innocent.”
“Even if he’s not, burning a house after killing someone is something that even I wouldn’t do if I’m in a bad mood,” said Jek. “I can’t believe I say this, but…even I have never got something worse than him.”
“When was your first kill?”
“Around his age, when my house was raided and my parents were killed.”
“Mine was when I was betrayed by my first partner.” Noticing Jek’s sudden tenseness, he said, “No, I’m not going to betray you. I’m no longer the Red Rogue.”
“I know you wouldn’t. Otherwise I had killed you a long time ago. Narati…I can’t seem to understand his outburst.”
“I think I understand.”
“Oh, you understand everything now?”
“I’m not in the mood for sarcasm.”
“Me neither…it’s out of habit. Sorry.”
“That’s fine. The reason why Narati was like that…could be of anger.”
“I think you’re right.” Jek looked towards the sleeping Narati. “Unless he woke up, we won’t be able to talk to him about his plight and his reason for going all out, but I can understand if he’s angry.”
“He’s angry to the world. I know he is. Those scars were not because of battles, but because of the misery he had endured for such a long time. He was so angry to the world, but he had no heart to vent it out. He’s…not strong enough. Every encounter throughout his journey must’ve been like yours.”
“Everybody is suspicious around Fa’ar, and I know how to deal with one to make them understand their place. Fa’ars were generally cowardly people who would trick someone for their own gain, but if someone was too strong for them to trick, they would become soft, asking for forgiveness and redemption. I…couldn’t believe any of them would not turn on my back.”
“I think I’m partly responsible for what happened today,” said Raine. “I was so determined to make him open up and become a friend for him that I failed to realize how mad he was to the world and everything it throws towards him. If I knew that his inability to trust wasn’t because of race, I would…”
“No, it’s best you don’t,” said Jek. “Whatever happens today, he rid a whole town of blight and plague. If not for his arson, life would be harder than it is now.”
“Oh, yes…I forgot. That might be something you would do anyway if you have no self-control.” Raine laughed, albeit half-heartedly. “Now what are you going to do?”
“What are we going to do,” corrected Jek. “You’re in this pit with me now. Are we going to abandon him here, or let him follow us?”
“I doubt that he’ll do that same stunt again, unless you decide to deal with slavers. I’d say take him.”
“My thought exactly. Get some sleep. I’ll be first watch.”
In the end, however, Jek couldn’t get some sleep, and Raine was too exhausted that he forgot to wake up. The morning came faster than they thought, and by the first light that shone on Narati’s face, he woke up.
He was at first dazed, but then a moment later he remembered everything that happened the previous day. He wanted to cry again, but smelling good roasted food made him forget all of those momentarily. He saw Jek cooking something with a machinery, powered by fire crystal, as a stovetop. He cooked some meat for him and the group to eat for breakfast. Jek had been looking at Narati for a while.
“I hope you’re an omnivore like your smaller kin, Narati.” Hearing Jek said his name made Narati felt light. He had never felt such respect from the Lup before. But as he grabbed the hot food, he realized why he started with his name.
“I…guess I screw up…,” said Narati slowly. “I…was so angry, I couldn’t stop myself from burning that house. I don’t want to…I didn’t mean to…”
“Shit happens, Narati. Look, kid, if you’re angry, why not just blow up something without causing that much mayhem? I know you can always do it.”
“I shouldn’t have done that! But somehow I…was so angry because of that slaver…”
“You mean triggered.”
“Seriously, Jek…stop saying that.”
“Okay, but don’t think you’re out of this.”
Narati became sullen and resumed talking.
“I always wanted to be independent. I kept reminding myself that it’s my life now after my pack was destroyed. But...whatever I do, I can’t muster any strength or will to fight back. I’m just a miserable rat taking the waste out of people’s trash. I was knocked out, lashed out by whips, humiliated, and even robbed, but I didn’t have the strength to fight. All I did was causing me more humiliation as they laughed on how miserable I was. I couldn’t stand it, but…I can’t do anything.
“When I met you, I was also scared, and thought that you’re just like everyone. But seeing Raine and you being friends…I wanted to be with you and feel like I need to prove that I’m not just some coward who can’t even use the lance I’m carrying around. But…I went too far in that town. I wanted to kill slavers and end slave trades because I think those people who willingly sold themselves had no other place to go and gave up. Not only that, I feel that their abuse and harassment was unbearable even for them, so I did just that.
“I want to set them free, or at least save them from their fate. I know killing is a last resort, but seeing that lion, being reduced from a prideful beast into a sex slave…opened something inside me that I didn’t want to know. I’m so sorry!”
“At least you’re honest,” said Jek. “But what if I told you that those slaves willingly sold themselves because they, too, need protection? Some of them were not as strong as you are and they had given up life because they knew the world hated them. If you kill their master, they had nowhere else to go and in the end, they’ll be the first victims of this world.”
“Then why can’t they be someone equal, like us?! I don’t care if they can’t fight, but you can’t objectify yourself just because you’re weak! I can’t fight properly but you two helped me, so, why can’t they?!”
“Because…all of us are fueled by greed,” said Jek solemnly. “Narati…you’ve been living like a nomad for so many years, alone and terrified with the world. You’ve learned not to trust even your own race, and especially strangers, but you don’t have a strength to fight back. Narati…you’ve been living in a world without muns for some time that you forgot what greed is.”
“So they sold themselves because of greed?!”
Jek never could’ve imagine a Fa’ar like him to start an argument, but he slowly respected the Fa’ar. Even with his weak heart and cowardly personality, he still had a sense of justice, no matter how twisted it was. The loup never would’ve thought someone like that existed.
Jek stopped the argument by putting his hand on Narati’s shoulder and said, “In this world, it’s kill or be killed. I kept reminding myself of that phrase. I know this place is no longer a fantasy we once were in prewar society. But…I guess your kind might do.”
Raine then move towards Jek, having heard their conversation. He also had never seen Jek being so respectful towards Narati. He took over talking with Narati by saying, “You can be angry with the world, and you have no one to stop you, but in the end, you’re going to be as lonely as you were before meeting us. You’re no longer fighting against the world anymore, Nara. At least not alone, anyway. You’ve got us. So, when you need to talk about things, you can do that with us, not by burning down the whole town and killing someone.”
“And not causing people to spread rumors that can make your race into a scapegoat every time a problem arises,” said Jek. “You gotta earn respect, not notoriety.”
Despite of how Jek told them the truth, Narati didn’t care much about them. All he cared about was that now he had two people that would support him. All his doubts of their own trustworthiness were soon replaced with relief. He soon cried again.
“This time, don’t cry your heart and your body out,” said Jek. “I don’t wanna carry you all the way, you understand me?”
Narati smiled and nodded, while Raine looked at the two in relief. He had never seen this side of Jek before. It could be something that he had intentionally left when he decided to be a bounty hunter, and finally regained when he saw Narati’s plight. He was glad that Narati could trust again.
With Narati in tow, they resumed their journey, this time equals with each other. No longer did Jek thought Narati as a coward, though his respect wasn’t that high enough for him to trust the young rat for anything revelant. Raine was relieved that his companions didn’t end up causing trouble within themselves. Yet, he was also questioning something.
Did they accept Narati because of his apparent will, or because of the fear of having him lose control?