FSE

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The car is filled with nonstop chatter and noise, though it isn't much different from earlier this morning. You initially panicked as not just one, but several of your daughters came to poke and shake you awake out of sheer excitement for today. You could barely get them all calm enough to dress and feed them before piling into the car. Even little Sally seemed energetic from her sisters' infectious mood.

You still feel tired from waking up so early, but you can't blame any of them. You find yourself even smiling as the four talked among themselves, their voices suddenly growing louder as they recognize the house whose driveway you pull into. They all click and fumble with their seat belts, only Amanda managing to figure it out before you could get to her.

One by one you helped your little rabbit daughters out of the car, each running up to the front door to knock against it or jump wildly to reach the doorbell. As you get the last daughter Lisa out of her seat, you hear the door open and see a familiar capybara greet the three.

"Oh my goodness! Hello sweeties!" she warmly welcomes as she bends down to hug the three.

"Hi Grandma!" they all respond, with Lisa shouting while in your arms.

"Happy birthday!" she smiles before letting the three go running inside. As you set Lisa down, she runs to your mother and tackles her leg in a hug. She stumbles slightly in surprise, but quickly laughs it off and bends down to hug the final daughter. After letting her go to join her sisters inside, your mother straightens herself with a slight grunt before greeting you with a similarly tender smile. “And how’s my favorite son?”

You couldn’t help but return the smile. “Could be better, but that’s nothing new.” She laughs as she brings a hand up to brush back her hair. You could spot hints of gray beginning to show through, a part of you wondering if she’s noticed it herself. “How’ve you and Dad been?”

“Well, your father’s still moody, but, it’s nothing new like you said,” she responds. “Well, let’s head on in before your girls set the house on fire.” You lock the car and follow your mother inside. Two of your daughters crowd around the worryingly large pile of wrapped gifts. Sally appears to be looking for which ones are hers while Amanda is violently shaking what you assume to be hers as she tries to check it. As your mother tries to calm your excited, gray-furred daughter down, you leave to find your Dad and remaining daughters. Thankfully, you quickly found all three in his study. Your father has his attention split between the TV and his two granddaughters, with Lisa talking about school and Megan silently standing beside her. As he breaks contact with the screen to look at Lisa, his eyes quickly dart up to see you standing in the doorway.

“Hey, there you are,” he announces, interrupting over Lisa talking about her friends at school. Your daughters briefly turn to look at you, though Lisa was quick to go back to talking with her human grandpa. He looks back to the two and speaks in the best enthusiastic voice he could muster, “Hey, how about you two go check with your grandma? She might want some help with... something. Probably a word that starts with a C.” Lisa grins widely and ushers her sister out of the room with her, leaving you and your father alone. He lets out a deep sigh and relaxes his head back into the chair as he resumes watching.

A pause is shared, with the only noise being the TV and the far off sounds of your daughters talking. “Wanna sit, or you just gonna stand there?” he suddenly speaks. You take his word and take a seat on the sofa beside him. His eyes briefly broke from the screen to look at you, but he quickly returned his attention back to the movie. You can tell he was trying to think of what to say as his thumb glided against the surface of the buttons on the remote at his side.

“They, uh... They always this chatty when they’re with you? Or, I guess at least Lisa is... Meg just said hi before the other just went all out,” he chuckles.

You take a short breath before answering. “Yeah, it depends on the day, I suppose. Megan, uh... She just doesn’t speak as much, she’s still a bit shy.”

Another moment of silence. Despite the occasion, you’re still never certain of how to feel when alone with your father. Either this is just a casual conversation, or he’s trying to warm you up for something else entirely.

“... Six years, huh? Least you, uh... Don’t have to worry about separate....” he trails off, a part of you knowing why he couldn’t finish his sentence. “Anyway, they, uh, seem happy.”

“Yeah.”

Another pause in the conversation. You feel a twinge of anxiety as he reaches for the remote and pauses the movie, cutting off all sound in the room. He stares at the still image of the screen and rubs the top of his index finger under his nose. He spends another moment rubbing his thumb against the top of the remote buttons as he tries to think until he eventually speaks. “You’ve... You been holding up, OK?”

“Yeah,” you answer automatically. You know damn certain that some days have been harder than others, but the last thing you want to do is reconfirm his suspicions and fears.

“That’s good,” he briefly states. He sets the remote down beside him and turns his head to face you. “Job still good?”

“Yeah, it’s been going fine.”

“Good, good.” His eyes look back down to the remote again, but he quickly looks back up without taking a moment to think. “Just... wanted to make sure you, uh, didn’t need anything, you know.” He takes another breath in, but he then surprises you by standing up from his seat. “Well, uh... Better join ‘em before your mother comes in here and whips me for not being social.”

He leaves the study and you follow after him, parts of you equally shocked and relieved that his talk was as brief and calm as it was. As you both reenter the living room, you see Lisa now looking over the pile of presents with Amanda. The excitable bun lists off wild guesses as to what could be inside her own gifts before quickly jumping into guesses about her sisters’ presents.

“Geez, did she really get all they- I mean, she really went all out with the list, huh?” you whisper to your Dad.

“Yeah, I told her what she had was fine, but she decided it wasn’t enough. Wanted to ‘make it a special sixth birthday’ for them all,” he responds. Your father groans and takes a seat at the couch across from the two. He looks to you and says, “She’ll probably be done in a bit. Said she wanted to do the cake first before the gifts and all.”

You nod and look behind him into the kitchen, spotting Sally’s white, cotton ball tail peeking out past the door frame. As you enter, you see your mother standing over a chocolate cake with a packet of small birthday candles in her hand. “You girls think six candles for you all to blow out would be fine, or do you think I should have six for each one of you?”

“I wan’ six candles!” Megan answers, her eagerness for cake overpowering her shyness. Sally, on the other hand, remains silent, but her eyes remain fixated on the chocolate cake.

“Six it is then,” your mother smiles as she gets to work setting up six small candles at each corner of the cake.

Megan giggles and runs out of the kitchen to join her sisters at the pile of presents. You hear Amanda call out for Sally, who briefly looks back to the living room. She turns back to stare longingly at the chocolate cake before reluctantly leaving to join her sisters. Now alone with your mother, you ask, “You need any help?”

“No, dear, just gotta get all of the candles in... Figured I’d either use them all now or have some left over for next year.”

“You know, you didn’t have to get... Well, everything I put on the list.”

“Oh hush,” she says, turning back to look at you. “It was no big deal, and I wanted to spoil my little honey buns.”

“Yeah, but... Well, thank you,” you say. You hold back your worries about them becoming bratty as they grow up, especially if she insists on continuing to do this. Just last Christmas she got each daughter three gifts each, clothes separate, and now she looks to be upping the ante with four each.

“Hey, they’re only six once,” she smiles, finishing the cake with the final candle. “Phew... Now to light them all.” She grabs a lighter set beside the cake and starts lighting each candle. “Go ahead and go get your father and the birthday girls.” Before you could even turn around, your daughter Sally makes an immediate return as she rushes past you to stare up at her grandma.

“Is it ready?” she asks.

“Oh, yes it is!” your mother playfully responds. “But we need to get your sisters!”

You leave for the living room, seeing two of your daughters still looking over the presents with Megan quietly talking to her granddad. “Hey, girls, it’s time for the cake,” you announce. The moment the words leave your lips, all chatter dies down as the three drops what they’re doing to hurry into the kitchen.

“Alrighty,” your father grunts as he lifts himself from his seat to slowly follow you back into the kitchen. The lights are turned off, with the only light coming from the twenty-four candles on the kitchen table. Your daughters eagerly look over the cake, their faces illuminated in a soft orange glow as they hover over each corner. Of them all, Sally dons the biggest smile, one so horribly infectious you couldn’t help but smile yourself. Your mother quickly puts away the lighter and digs her phone out from her purse, muttering a quiet, “Hold on, hold on...” Tapping the screen a few times, she announces, “OK, ready?”

You take a breath in.

And then begin to sing.

Your mother starts the song before you and your father join in. Singing all four of their names was a little clunky, but the charm of the song still made the girls giggle among themselves. Then finally, as the song reached its end, your mother caps it off with a cheerful “Yay! Now blow out your candles!” Amanda takes a deep breath in and blows, taking out a few flames on the other corner before Lisa could blow hers. Meanwhile, Megan tries blowing out each of her candles individually. Finally, Sally blew hers out as fast as she could manage, completing hers first before she quickly asks, “Can we have cake now?”

“Not yet, sweetie!” she laughs. Megan was the last one left, still slowly going through her candles one by one.

“Do you need help?” Amanda shouts as Megan reaches her last two candles. As she finally blows out her last two candles, your mother cheers as you flick the lights back on.

“OK girls, let me get you your plates,” your mother says as she taps her phone off. She soon gets to work getting each of your daughters a plate, then she begins cutting out slices of cake for them all. The four start tearing into their pieces of cake, with Sally being the most vigorous of the four. Brown streaks of icing and cake stain her once snow-white fur around her mouth and nose as she burns through her first slice. She was the first to ask her grandmother for another slice. Your mother couldn’t help but laugh at the stains on her granddaughter’s face, granting her request for another slice while taking her picture. Due to the lack of seats, you remained standing with your father at the other end of the kitchen. You quietly ate your piece of cake as you both watch. the small chaos unfold. A small part of your brain is worried about how the four will be hopped up on sugar, but you ignore the thought as you see Sally give your mother a chocolate-smeared smile as she gets her second piece.

“Heh,” your father chuckles, breaking you from your thoughts to look at him. “You seem pretty happy.”

“Well, it is their birthday,” you say, turning back to look at your daughters. Lisa, Megan, and Amanda talk over each other as they try to tell their grandmother about various different things. Sally was still focused on her cake, too busy to pitch in.

“Yeah, it’s just... Well, I’m glad you’re happy. ‘s better than pulling your hair out taking care of them and... I’m just glad you’re doing OK.”

You feel your smile wane. You know just a few weeks ago you had a depressing meltdown, all in front of their teacher and your college friend no less. You struggled to patch things up since then, but the tone and look she gives you keep reminding you of the time you failed to keep your cool. You’re thankful when she asks if you’re OK and if she could help, but you should’ve never let something like that ever come out. She still keeps you updated on how your daughters are, occasionally bringing up things like the weather or a party coming in a month or so on Halloween. You never liked the awkward act of pretending everything’s normal after something has happened, but you can at least appreciate her still trying to talk to you. Still, you know you haven’t been holding yourself together well at all. Despite the guilt you feel lying, you almost feel a sense of pride hearing your father’s partial approval.

“Thank you.”

“Yeah, well, just gotta wait until they hit their teens. Then you’ll be as bald as your granddad was,” he smirks.

You do your best to return the smile. “Yeah.” You can’t begin to imagine how they’d turn out as they grow older, but you hope that in the very least they’ll at least all turn out all right.

Your father grunts as he puts his plate aside in the sink. “Well... Should, uh, probably warn you now,” he starts. As worry begins to cloud your mind, your father continues in hushed whispers, “Your, ah, mother... Well, she’ll probably come to you and start asking about... You know... Progress on getting the four a... step-mother.”

You couldn’t help but choke a bit as he said that, though thankfully you avoid drawing anyone’s attention as you try to clear your throat. “I- No, I haven’t-”

“Yeah, I know, just... She talks to me at night sometimes worrying for you, and I just figured you should prep for that now than when she hits you with that question out of the blue.” He pauses for a moment to clear his throat with another grunt. “I know you’re still probably... Well, anyway, I just wanted to let you know. I know it’s not just something you can get right off the bat, but it is... You know, something to think about.”

You set your plate down and look at your daughters. Sally’s trying for her third piece as the others go for seconds, chocolate now beginning to stain her white-furred hands. They all look happy, especially your mother, but you wonder if without a step-mother to care for them they’d come to resent you. Maybe they would grow up improperly without a female role model in their lives. You can feel a headache beginning to brew already just thinking about the potential problems.

“Yeah... Thank you,” you answer.

He stops talking and continues watching all of the gals. After some time passes, your mother asks if they’re “awful” and if it’s present time. All of the daughters except Sally cheer, the latter now a lost cause as you see some chocolate staining the tips of her ears. In a few moments, all of the girls are wiped clean to the best of your mother’s ability and given a seat on the couch. One by one the presents are given to your daughters, with each reaction captured in a photo by your mom. Your daughters are overjoyed with the abundance of gifts, and with some prompting from your end, all come to thank their grandparents before running off to play in the backyard or living room.

“Feel free to wait a bit as they wear themselves out, dear,” your mother advises you with a smile. “They’ll be out cold once the sugar wears out. By the way, I got the cake in a tub for you to take home.”

“Thank you. Again, you-”

“No, no,” she hushes you. “Like I said, it’s not a problem.” She gives you another warm smile, though it wanes ever so slightly as she looks you in the eyes. She looks ready to say something, but she stops and looks back out the window to a few of the bun children playing. You can already assume what she wanted to talk about. Before you could work up the nerve to speak first, she speaks, “Hey, so... Halloween’s coming up in a bit. You gonna get something for them all to wear?”

“I... I don’t know yet.”

“Well,” she huffs jokingly, “I got some ideas, though you could ask them. Just make it cute!”

“Sure,” you smile. “There, uh... Anything else you want me to do? Ah, with... them?”

She looks back out the window, then to the closest one of your daughters still inside. She breathes in slowly, then responds with another smile, “Nope. Just wanted to ask about that.”

You’re still worried about that inevitable question, though now you’re worried about not giving her some form of an answer. Regardless, you smile and say, “All right, I’ll, uh... Figure out what they want to wear. Dunno if they’ll all pick something cute, but-”

“Pssh... Any one of them could dress as a pile of trash for Halloween and they’d still be the cutest little things. Just let me know and I’ll get it sorted out.”

You almost speak up to say she shouldn’t have to handle their costumes, but you know you’ll be shot down anyway. “Thank you.”

“Like I said, not a problem. Just consider it payback for when you clean Sally tonight. Hehe, almost mistook her for Lisa when giving out the gifts.”

You laugh with her, now wondering just how much of a chocolate mess Lisa could be hiding in plain sight. With nothing else to do or talk about, you rest back into the sofa cushions and watch your daughters play. Sometimes, a niggling thought would pop up about a worry or fear. Sometimes about what to do tomorrow, today, or worries about them, your friends, your job, and whatever else. However, for some reason, the thoughts don’t stick around as much as they would any other time. Maybe today is just a good day for you, or the idea of infectious happiness is grounded in some sort of truth seeing everyone here today. You’re not going to worry about any of that, at least not for now. For now, you feel happy. For now, you’re going to enjoy today. Everything else can wait until tomorrow.