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The Gift

Edward's Storyline, Chapter 1.4

copyright comidacomida 2018

I began walking back toward the car. "So is it that hard to understand that I'm angry?"

Remaining right where he was, Treboada called after me. "Ah knew it from th' start, Eddie... ah knew ye'd do yer dinger an' 'ave at me."

Stopping after a few steps I looked back to Treboada and asked "If you knew I'd be this angry then why'd you tell me?"

"Yeh asked."

Letting out a sigh, I kept my back to him so he couldn't see how much the discussion was disturbing me. "So you're coming clean and hoping that pleading guilty means I won't hold it against you as much?"

Treboada made no sound as he approached but somehow I could still tell that he was drawing closer before he spoke. "Nay, Lad. Ah cannae control how yeh respond-- all ah ken do is be 'onest, an' if yeh gonna ask then ah'm gonna tell yeh."

I felt my hands shaking; I also wanted to cry, but I managed to fight the tears back as I turned around to face him. "So you don't feel even a little shame about ruining someone's life? You aren't the least bit guilty?"

He blinked, his Emerald eyes gleaming as he looked right at me. I remember being stunned for a moment, hypnotized by the little purple flecks of color swimming in his gaze. "Ah regret 'urtin' yeh, Lad. Ah neveh wanted t'make yer life 'ard or bring yeh any pain... that's somethin' that'll sit with meh fereveh."

His round-about answer lit a spark of fury inside me. "Why? Why exactly am I so important? What's so special about ME that makes you care how I feel when you obviously didn't care enough to object to the plan of my mom getting raped?"

Treboada stepped forward, slowly extending his paw to me. He turned it over, revealing his dark gray paw-pad. "Will yeh gimme yer 'and, Edward?"

It was the first time the Wolf had actually called me by my actual name rather than some pet name or 'Eddie', and it caught me off guard. I had just started to hold my hand out before I realized what I was doing; I stopped. "Why?"

He met my gaze and I met his, the vibrant Green in his eyes flickering with points of purple and gold. Treboada's ears rose and I could hear the strange familiarity in his tone. "Because ah asked."

The Wolf had put me in quite a spot, especially since his declared reason for coming clean to me was because I asked. There was a big difference between him answering a question and me letting him touch me but, at the same time, I was a little confused; would we be able to touch? Why would he want to? Would I be able to punch him again? Would I try? I couldn't answer any of those questions so, in the end, I did what he asked. "Fine."

I set my palm against his and, to my surprise, I could feel it; the paw pads were the same as fine sandpaper-- strangely smooth despite the texture. He closed his fingers around my hand but, rather than it feeling like he was grabbing me it felt more like a connection. He spoke candidly. "Ah'm a warriah, boy-o, an ah cannae speak about what ah feel as well as ah ken show it."

What he was saying made no sense... until it did. Treboada's gaze stayed on me right up until the point he closed his eyes and, strangely, my vision went black as if I'd closed my own. The sounds of the world around me muted until it was scarcely background white noise, and all senses fled me save what I felt on the inside, and that was magnified greatly. I found myself searching for focus, and the first thing that struck me was a sense of unmistakable confidence-- the kind of pride that had escaped me my entire life.

Treboada spoke, but I heard his statement in my own voice. "I am a Tribal Spirit, Edward, and I have always known my purpose. Not all spirits can say the same."

That sensation of egoism faded and I could clearly feel its absence. Treboada continued speaking and, once again, it sounded like me narrating. "Tribal Spirits are nothing without a Tribe, and mine has been beat down, been thinned out, and changed so much over time that there is so little left of it that I'd have to look ten times to get once glance of what had been before."

I felt my heart begin to pound; the sense of apprehension and anxiety grabbed me with an icy chill. My own voice explained. "Tribal Spirits cannot exist without a people, and as I lost my people I was pushed closer and closer to... failure."

Although I was caught adrift in the many changing emotions I somehow managed to use my own voice and interrupt him. "What do you mean, failure?"

His answer was both simple and complex at once. "A Tribal Spirit gains strength when our people are strong and becomes weak when our people suffer. It is our job to protect and watch over our people, but I could not help my tribe enough."

I felt a strong punch of sorrow hit me in the gut and, although I wasn't crying, there was a sense of tears falling down my cheeks. "Spirits have no family, Edward. For a Tribal Spirit, our people are our friends, our sons, our daughters, our mothers, our fathers, our sisters and our brothers. They are our lovers and our teachers and our students. To lose that would be like losing everyone who was ever important to you... and, while you would lose eighteen years of that, spirits measure our losses in centuries."

Even as I was choking under the oppressive sadness, it suddenly lifted, and I was raised up by a powerful sense of warmth and lightness-- I was feeling hope. "When I came to this new world I learned that, like my people, I could reinvent myself and become something new without surrendering what I had been. I was able to become a Tribal Spirit again and I found a small but worthwhile family that had held true to the ways I called my own."

The explanation was far more than I'd ever heard Treboada say at once, which was, in a way, ironic since he was using my voice to speak. That point passed out of my mind the moment I was struck by that same feeling I had when I heard from the Wolf that he'd had a part in my mom's rape; I felt betrayed and disappointed and helplessly disgusted. "Sean, your father, was the last child of that family. He destroyed the lives of everyone around him and he destroyed his own. While I'd had so much hope for two generations, all of that ended with him and I knew he would be the end of everything for me."

Only in that moment did everything finally start to come together; he was telling me a story of his past through emotions. The next one, though, was a feeling I really hated-- I was disgusted with myself. "That was when I met The Ancient One, and he told me what I could do to continue his bloodline... and I said yes."

The Wolf continued to dance around the main issue, so I took control again and demanded of him "What was so important to the two of you that-- that IT happened?"

The world around me came back to focus as Treboada slowly pulled his paws away, his fingers gently sliding off of mine. "Ah said bafore, laddy-- yeh be the reason ahm heah now... if not for yeh bein' born ah'd'a lost what made me me."

I clenched my fingers a few times as I looked around the empty park before glanced back to the big black Wolf. "What about The Ancient One?"

He shrugged. "Ah might guess, but ah cannae say fer sure-- yeh gotta ask him if yeh wanna know fer sure... but ah know th' Ancient One cannae give th' Gift t'someone if'n they dunnae have pain. Yeh ma... well, boy-o, she 'ad that... an' yeh' 'ave that too."

Staring at the Wolf, I felt so many emotions flowing through me. They weren't as strong as what he'd had me experience but they were probably some of the most powerful emotions I'd ever felt, and there were more there than I'd ever experienced at once. In one sense, I admired Treboada; I hated him; I pitied him; I was angry with him; I identified with him; I loved him; I feared him-- I still didn't know what to think. One thing I did know though was that he didn't have to tell me, but he decided that he would... because I asked. "Thank you for telling me about my mom, Treboada."

He nodded briefly. "Yeh welcome, Lad... an' now ah'm at yeh merceh... yeh ken send me away if yeh want if that's what yeh feel yeh gotta do."

I didn't need his permission to kick him to the curb, and I was pretty sure he knew that. However, after giving it a moment's thought, I--