College Years
#3 of College Years
College Years Chapter 3
Allen
It was 5:00 am and I was already up, making breakfast in the small kitchen that was in the dorm. Eggs and bacon was this morning's breakfast. As I cooked, I began to think back to what had happened yesterday when I ran into my new roommate.
I remembered that feeling I got, the one that I was hoping I'd never come across again, the one that I was hoping had left my life forever. I had hoped in vain. Memory betrayed me, and I thought back to when I had been happy, back when love really meant something to me; when it was a part of everyday life. I remembered his face, his beautiful icy blue eyes that gazed deep into my soul with warmth and affection.
My adrenal glans suddenly kicked into overdrive and sent my heart into a frenzied beat as I remembered that one day when I lost him forever. The screeching of the brakes, the blaring of the horn, then the sound of metal smashing into metal. I remembered the exact words that the paramedic had said; '"I'm sorry...but there's nothing we can do...he's gone"' Tears began rolling down from my eyes as the memory lingered in my thoughts.
Staggering back from the counter I dropped down into one of the chairs at the dining table. Putting my face in my paws, I started to sob. Suddenly I heard a voice say, "Allen?," I snapped my head up to see Blake standing by the bedroom door in his pajamas, an alarmed look in his eyes. "What's wrong? Why are you crying?"
Quickly wiping my tears away, I ignored his question and instead stated, "Breakfast is al-almost done. G-Give it about t-ten, fifteen m-minutes"
He didn't say anything as I got back up and headed over to the stove. Then suddenly he said something that caused my entire body to go rigid.
"Allen, we're going to be living together for a whole year. I-I think that we should be able to talk about things that are going to involve the both of us."
Slowly I turned around to stare at him, finding that he was standing only a few feet away now.
My fists were clenched and my eyes were watering even more than before. In a trembling voice, I gave him my response. "Wh-What did you say? How dare you try and...and-" I broke down into tears.
Before I knew what happened, I felt Blake slip his arms around me, holding me gently. Without thinking, I buried my face into the white fur on the side of his neck and began bawling my eyes out.
Time was lost during that moment, I had no idea how long we stood there like that, but it wasn't until I smelled the overly cooked bacon that I finally came to my senses. Realizing what I was doing, I quickly pushed myself away from Blake, only to find myself up against the stove. I felt vulnerable enough as it is, and it scared me.
Our eyes locked, but only for a moment. I was the first to look away. Turning, I grabbed a paper towel from the dispenser and quickly wiped my tears away before focusing my attention onto the stove. Soon, after a bit of scrambling around, I had breakfast on the table. In silence we sat and ate, not so much as glancing at each other, well, I didn't anyway. I couldn't even look at the wolf sitting across from me, though I could sense him sneaking a look or two every now and then at me. It wasn't until I was nearly finished eating that the silence was broken
"Allen?"
My fists clenched at the sound of him saying my name. Flattening my ears, I focused even more on my plate in an effort to block him. It was a vain attempt.
"Allen, please"
Growling in a dangerously low tone, I finally looked up at him and acidly replied, "What?"
"Is there something th-that you want to talk abou-"
I snapped.
"WHY DO YOU FUCKING CARE?! WHY DON'T YOU JUST MIND YOUR OWN DAMN BUSINESS AND STAY THE FUCK OUT OF MINE?!"
Blake cowered against back of his chair in fear, his eyes as wide as saucers. Realizing what I had just done, I pushed my plate away and left the table. On my way back to the room, memories flooded my head again. After slamming the door shut, I climbed up to the top bunk of the bed and buried my face into the pillow, sobbing.
By the time my tears had all dried up, it was already 6:13 am. Thirty-three minutes had already passed since the moment I had stormed away from the table. Which meant that I only had time for a quick shower before classes started at 7:00.
Climbing down from the bed, I made my way over to my dresser and opened the top drawer. My outfit had already been put together and there it awaited me: black boxers, tight blue jeans, and a white tee.
Taking the outfit out and setting on top of the dresser, I reached into the back portion of the drawer and took hold of something with a leathery texture to it. Pulling it out, I set it on top of my clothes and eyed it for a moment.
It was a black leather collar with pink heart-shaped studs going along the outside. I wore it around with me every chance I could get, which was usually always save for a few exceptions; like when I forget it.
Gathering up my things, I turned and headed towards the closed door, bracing myself mentally for the challenge that I was no doubt to be facing the moment I'd leave the bedroom. It was time that I forget about love. It was possible for me once before, but never again...