The Symbol? - Chapter 5
#6 of The Symbol
Sorry for the short ending and crappy cliff hanger everyone, work has been getting on my ass lately. My schedule is being crammed and I'm not having a lot of time. Going to the doctors and making sure I focus on my work, as well. But don't worry, next chapter I will make it longer. I'll probably post it in 1-2 days, but until then, enjoy! You can also read my story series 'Karma's Fate'. I will start picking up on that series, soon.
But until then, I hope everyone has a great day!
~Disturbia
~Morning~
I looked in the mirror in disbelief. Just the day before, I thought I was in love with someone who actually cared for me and whom I trusted. Moments later, I find myself drowning in a swimming pool, thinking I was about to die. I was taken for a fool, blinded by love. I should have known from the start it was too good to be true, but I was blinded. I'm not a bimbo living in a fantasy world, this is reality. I was sad, but I was also extremely angry. The same words echoed through my head,
"I'll always be there for you"
"Give me your trust"
The whimsical thing about it was that I actually trusted him. I gave him my trust and look where I ended up. Would he have been happy seeing me drown? Would it have satisfied him? I had so many thoughts scrambling around my mind it made me so angry.
Out of frustration, I punched the white, concrete wall. My [aw was bleeding and it was hurting badly, but I didn't care. I kept punching it and punching it until I made a dent in it. I looked at the dent, the hollow dent. The hollow dent was just like my heart, it was hollow. The only thing that filled it up was nothingness, only a dark void of nothingness.
I tried fighting back the tears, but I couldn't help it. I could see from the mirror I was a mess, my shirt was still wet and soaked, I had uncontrollable tears running down my face, the fact is that I looked horrible. I looked over at my phone, I had 26 messages, all from Jake. I didn't even dare look at my phone or even touch it. I just wanted to be left alone. Luckily, school was out today, meaning I didn't have to miss out on any studies considering if today was a school day, I'd just stay home.
Now that I think about it; i think besides my heart, my ego is also hurt right now. I've always known we lived in a world of reality, not a fantasy or a dream. I know because my dream of me and my sister living with my mother and father as a happy family disappeared as if it was never meant to exist in the first place. I never wanted to experience the pain of living in reality, but it seems reality took it's toll on me.
I decide to get up and go to the kitchen. I didn't sleep at all and I looked execrable. I sat at the kitchen table and looked at the texts Jake sent me. Most of them asked if I was okay and that he was exceedingly sorry. I didn't want to hear or see his apologies, I just wanted to be left alone.
I sighed sadly and stood up. I've always felt cheerful around him, even though he hurt me, I still feel cheerful around him. His absence hurt and felt like like the walls were closing in on me.
I look over at the time and see it's 12:54pm. It was raining again today, not as bad as yesterday, but the sky was grey and the streets were hollow. I felt a sudden strong urge of getting out of the house. I needed to buy some groceries anyways since I was low on food. I went over to the counter, grabbed my wallet and phone, and went straight toward the door. But before I left, I went to the bathroom to get a quick bandage for my bleeding paw. Most of the blood dried up but it left a red stain on my wrist. I had white fur so it was clearly visible to see. But, I decided to bandage it up either way.
I pulled on some fresh blue jeans and a white T-shirt. I put on my long black coat before exiting my house and turn off all my lights to insure I'm not home.
I walked down the street to the super market and notice the rain is really taking it's toll. The streets were flooded with water, but they were still safe to walk through. I look up at the sky as I'm walking down the street and notice the endless amount of drops pouring from the sky. The mood was pretty depressing, which is the same exact mood I feel right now.
I walked into the super market and bought the groceries I needed. As I walked down the paying aisle, I noticed a group of teenage girls from school talking about Jake. I quickly get near them but pretend I'm minding my own business by reading the newspaper. I eavesdrop on their conversation.
They were giggling and talking about Jake.
"Jake is so hot!"
"I know!"
"Do you think he has a girl friend?"
"Probably! I mean come on, he's captain of the foot ball, the most popular guy in school, of course he's probably dating somebody. He's probably dating Brittany, that otter who's the most popular girl in the school."
"No, they broke up a while ago. He's probably available now!"
"Jake sounds like a really sweet guy. He's the man of every girls dream!"
At that point I had enough. I bit my lip trying to hold back the stinging tears that were about to pour out. I hurried away from the girls and proceeded to check out and pay for my items. After paying for my items, I was so lost and careless I some how ended up at the park. Since I was here, I just sat on one of the park benches. It was raining harder and there was no one in sight, I was all alone in the park.
I looked at the play ground, it was empty, no child in sight. I decided to go over to the swing set. I sat on the swing set and gently swung back and fourth; I was desperately trying to get rid of Jake from my mind. I couldn't help it, I couldn't. No matter how hard I try, I can't get him out of my head.
After a while of thinking, I decide to go back to my house. When I got to my house I nearly choked.
I saw Jake leaning against the door of my house, soaking wet from all the rain. He was looking at his phone, he looked as if was frantically trying to call someone.
I froze at my spot. I was staring at Jake as if he was a ghost. I clutched my grocery bag tightly and remembered what the girls said.
"So hot!"
_"Sweet guy!" _
_"Popular guy!" _
The words echoed in my head and I couldn't get rid of them. I didn't want to face Jake not now. But I couldn't help but stare at him, stare at the same man who almost killed me, stare at the same man who hurt me.
I still saw that he was trying to call someone. It was pretty late, so I decided to turn on my phone and check the time. Just as I turned on my phone, it rang immediately. I quickly looked at the number calling, it was Jake.
He quickly spun around and saw me holding my phone in one hand. I was anxious, I was getting ready to call him every horrible thing I wanted to call him for what he did to me. But I couldn't. All I wanted to tell him was that I missed him.
"Kevin! Oh god, are you okay?!" Jake asks me_._
"Yes, I'm fine." I say heading towards my door to unlock it. I didn't even look at him.
_"Look Kevin, I wanted to come by and apologize for what happened yesterday..." _He said lowering his voice.
I open my door and close it slowly._ "What's done is done." _
He blocks the door with hand and opens it up._ "Kevin, please, forgive me. I didn't mean for any of that to happen." _
My heart sank into my stomach making me sick, I couldn't breathe. After a few moments, I was finally able to spit out the words.
"So you expect me to forgive you like nothing happened? You expect me to forgive you and we all live happily ever after?" I say raising my voice.
_"Look Kevin, I know it was stupid of me. But I didn't know!" _He said in a pleading tone.
"What's done is done, Jake." I tell him.
"Don't you have any feelings for me? Don't you love me?" _He asks me sobbing silently. _
"Feelings?" I tell him. "I don't have any left anymore. Why do you even care?"
_"I have feelings for you, Kevin. Ever since we met eyes, I've always loved you. It seemed kind of crazy at first, I've dated so many girls, but I've never had the thought of dating a guy. But you were different. Please Kevin, I want to be with you." _
There he goes saying incoherent words and meaningless phrases. Part of me wanted to forgive him and just hug him. But I didn't know what to do. I was extremely angry, he didn't really expect for me to fall for him and forgive him, did he?
"_I never knew the crew was going to prank you, I even made sure with them that they don't prank you horribly. I cared for you. I jus-" _He says stuttering
"Just what?!?" I say in a loud tone.
_"I just wanted to keep you safe!" _He says yelling at me.
That load of bull crap. I couldn't stand it anymore.
"Just LEAVE!" I say screaming. "JUST GO ALREADY!"
I slammed the door and went to my bedroom. I fell onto my bed, crying. I knew he had broken me, he had won.
Later that night, I decided to take a long, hot shower to try to calm and relax myself. I was still tearing up. The shower was nice and warm, but it's warmth didn't comfort me at all. While I was in the shower, I thought about what he said to me. I wanted to believe him, but I refused to. I then started to sob and tear up again. After letting it all out of my system, I get out of the shower and put on some boxers. I didn't feel like putting on a shirt or a short, I was madly depressed.
The rain outside made the mood even worse. I still loved the rain, I really did. But the thunderstorm outside had me shaking and I was afraid I'd have a black out.
A while later, I hear a knocking at my door.
"COMING!" I yell. I didn't care if anyone saw me in my boxers, I didn't care about anything else at this point.
I go to the door and open it slowly, only to find the husky; Jake, standing at my front porch.