Ander - Part 3: Subchapter 25
25
The howls of pain from the fire and the screams of horror from the crowd filled Ander with an emotion he was too ashamed to admit to himself, but it was there, and deep down, he couldn't help but revel in its glory.
That emotion was pure satisfaction.
Garten burst out of the bonfire, scattering smoking logs and chunks of coal everywhere. He was only in there for a second, but his fur was already a blazing inferno.
He fell down to the ground, screaming, and started to roll in the dust, desperately trying to kill the flames.
Ander just watched him writhe in pain and agony. Squirming down below, sweeping his arms across the dirt, he looked like an oversized insect with plucked wings, an insect that was still stupid enough to gnash its pincers at its enemy.
Through all this, Garten had never let go of the spear that had caused his defeat.
The last of the flames finally died away, and Ander scrutinized what lay before him - no, _relished_it, drinking in every detail...
His fur was scorched and smoking, entire patches burned away by the intense heat. Ander could see the soft, pink meat underneath, breaking out in shiny blisters, some of them as big as his fist. Blood slowly oozed from his shaking body, and he was making the most pathetic sound, something that couldn't even be described as mewling. He sounded more like a mouse than a Wolf.
"What have you done?" Dorin asked in a wavering voice. He was shaking almost as badly as his master. "What in the Cora's name have you d-"
Ander looked at him. It wasn't a menacing glare, or a stupefying stare, or anything like that. It was just a simple look, a simple tilt of the head, but Dorin must have seen something. Maybe he saw what Ander was feeling on the inside, because his good ear dropped down and his tail curled between his legs. "W-Who are you?" he stammered, taking a careful step backwards. "No... What are you? What manner of devil are you!?"
Ander gave the question some serious thought, but he couldn't come up with an answer. Truth be told, he had no idea what he was anymore, and neither did he care.
Dorin spared his quivering master one final glance, then simply backed away through the crowd, staring fixedly at Ander with wide eyes, slowly shaking his head, one hand clutching his torn ear. His lips moved rapidly, and Ander realized he was reciting a silent prayer of protection to the Cora, not just for himself, but for his entire family.
Ander's gaze slowly drifted across the crowd, making them recoil and flinch, as if it had a physical weight to it, something they could feel on their bodies.
They had called him a monster more than once this night, but now that they were actually seeing one before their very eyes, standing right on front of them? Everyone was retreating, backing away from this sudden horror they had unleashed. For the first time since Ander was thrown to the Wolves, the oval they had formed around him and the bonfire was receding. The egg was growing bigger.
The only one who refused to retreat was Wardo, who was now standing inside the circle without having moved an inch. He was grinning from ear to ear, as if he hadn't had this much fun in years.
Garten was still making his sad little noises. "E... eh..." He had managed to claw his way back up onto his knees, and was now looking down at the blisters on his hands in astonishment. One of them burst wide open like a flower in bloom, spilling blood across his palm. "Y - You..." he said, turning to face Ander. "You..." His words sounded mushy because his lips, nose, and even his tongue had been badly burned. His eyes were red and watering. "You...!" It was as if his entire vocabulary had been reduced to that single, accusatory syllable. "You...! You...! You!" He grabbed the smoking spear and used it like a cane to push himself up from the ground, his knees trembling under his own weight. "YOU!!"
He took a shuffling step forward, and the newfound rage inside Ander flared up again. If this thing wanted to come at him, he would be more than happy to strike him down. He would do it for Hezzi. He would...
But Hezzi wouldn't want that, would he?
Not so different... after all...
A sudden, throbbing pain erupted inside Ander's head, but it didn't come from the gash Garten had put there. This was something else. It felt like his head was swelling, and that it would just crack open at any second, like -
Like an egg...
Ander could see himself emerging from that egg in his dream, the one filled to bursting with blood... but the paw reaching out of the cracks wasn't the same light shade of brown as before. It was pitch black...
What am I doing here? he thought. What's happening to me?
"Garten, stop this!" Nilia shouted. Ander didn't even notice when she came to stand between them, but she was right there, standing with her back to him, her arms splayed out at either side.
Just like the Cor -
Pain shot through his head again, like an arro -
Ander clapped a hand over his eye, certain that it had been pierced somehow. The pain was so intense, he couldn't even scream. Maybe someone threw a rock, or -
And then it was gone. Just like that.
I'm going insane, Ander realized, slowly lowering his hand. That's what I'm doing here. That's what's happening to me.
"Get out of my way, bitsh..." Garten snarled. Puffy flakes of skin were peeling away from his lips, exposing the raw meat underneath, red and bloody. "I'm going to kill him... That monshter... I'll kill him!"
"The only one you'll end up killing is yourself!" Nilia shouted, sounding absurdly like a mother who's had just about enough from a stubborn cub. "Just look at you! You need help! Let me take you to the witchdoctor, she'll -"
"No! No! No!" Garten heaved for breath after every word, and each time he did, a flap of loose skin would blow out from his upper lip. "I'll kill! I'll kiiill!"
Wait, there was something strange going on here... Ander didn't think it odd before because Garten was making such a spectacle of himself, but why was Nilia standing with her back facing the enemy? When you try to protect someone, shouldn't it be the other way around? You should always face the enemy, and turn your back towards the ones who can't defend themselves. Even Ander knew that. Surely a Wolf like Nilia would never make a rookie mistake like that, would she?
Ander looked at her back for what felt like quite a while, but he no longer trusted his own sense of time. The way her shoulder blades made twin crescents of shadow, one slightly thicker than the other because of the light's angle... The way her body narrowed at the waist, but widened ever so slightly at the hips... She was masculine, yes. A warrior in every way. But underneath all that, she was still a she-wolf. A woman. Didn't she realize that he could just walk up and bite down on that sexy neck of hers whenever he wanted? He could do it right now. Just walk a few paces, open his mouth... and...
What are you thinking!?
Ander suddenly felt sick to his stomach, sick and filthy, because...
Because his mouth was watering...
Bile rose up inside Ander's throat, hot and burning, unbearably bitter, and he was powerless to stop it. It burst out of his mouth and even his broken nose, splashing the ground with a foul-smelling mess. He bent over and threw up again, watching in horror as his vomit splashed down between his feet, spotted with blood.
You can't, not now. Pull yourself together... Your life is at stake here!
Ander raised his head, a thin line of drool hanging from his mouth, and quickly looked around to see if anyone was thinking of taking advantage of this temporary weakness.
They were staring at him, horrified, disgusted, but none of them had come any closer.
Good, that's good. I think I'll be okay. Yes, I'm okay...
Nilia was still trying to keep Garten away, ordering him to go see Shekka, but he would have none of it.
I'm okay... I'm okay...
He still felt nauseous, but that was probably because of all the blood loss and the sticky puddle of vomit at his feet. If he could just get away from it, he'd start to feel better. Yes, that's what he'd do. He'd just take a step, and then another, and another... yes, that's right. Everything's fine. Everything's perfectly all right...
I'm okay... Ander thought, clutching his stomach like one who's been poisoned, shuffling along much like Garten was trying to do. I'm okay...I'm okay... I'm - No, no I'm not. I'm not okay...
All the strength ran out of Ander's legs and he collapsed down to his knees. The pain was coming back, all of it; his shoulder, his nose, his forehead, his ear, his hand, the spot underneath his arm where the spearhead had burned into him. Every time he moved it felt like two wet pieces of leather rubbing against each other.
And now, to top it all off, he was starting to feel lightheaded again. He had to plant his hands on the ground just to keep himself from tipping over. Probably made him look like a zealot deep in prayer.
"Get out of my way, bitsh!" Garten roared. "Or Cora help me I'll tear right through you, I shwear!"
"You can't fight right now! Use your common -"
A sudden _swish_cut off her words, a noise that instantly made Ander's heart rate double. It was the exact same sound the spear had made slicing through the air when Garten cut down Hezzi.
Ander raised his head with much difficulty (it felt three times heavier than it should be), certain that he would see Nilia lying on the ground with a spear sticking out of her chest, but she was still standing, albeit a big leap back from where she was previously.
"What the hell are you doing, Garten!?" she screamed.
"Bitsch! You bitsch! For the last time, get out of my way!" Garten raised the spear straight up into the air and swung it down, wielding it more like an axe.
Nilia had no choice but to jump out of the way again, opening a direct path between him and Ander.
"You!" Garten shrieked, now holding the spear properly above his shoulder. "Heshi couldn't take your eye, but I will! I'll take both of them!!" He charged, screaming.
Get up, Ander. Get up right now!
He knew he had to move, but he couldn't! His body wasn't listening!
"I'll take them booooth!!" Garten planted his foot and thrust the spear downwards. In that split second, Ander could see it race for his eye, could see the blackened tip grow bigger and bigger until it blotted out the world, it -
It stopped.
It quivered and shook just a few inches from his face, doubled and blurry this close to his eyes, but it wasn't coming any closer.
Focus, Ander!
He blinked rapidly, but the image that formed out of the shadows didn't make much sense either.
Nilia had grabbed hold of the spear's shaft behind Garten's back, and was fighting furiously to keep him from shoving it straight down into Ander's face.
"The use of weapons is forbidden," she grunted, her face contorted with effort, her small, but well defined biceps bulging out in her arms, "against those who have been Thrown to the Wolves!"
"Let go, you crazy bitsch!"
"No! You let go!" Amazingly, Nilia started to back up, pulling Garten along with her, who stubbornly refused to let go of the spear in his crazed bloodlust. "You're going to get yourself killed, Garten!" she shouted. "Can't you see I'm only trying to help y - !?"
Garten's hand slipped down her side and came to rest on the dagger she always wore on her hip.
"I'll kill hiiiim!!" he screamed, letting go of the spear and wrenching Nilia's dagger from its sheath all at the same time. He dove through the air, raising the dagger above his head as Nilia staggered back, the now redundant spear clutched in her hands.
It was one of the most horrific sights Ander had ever seen; this charred, bloody creature flying at him through the air, silhouetted against a towering bonfire like a demon out of hell. He could see the fire's reflection in the dagger's metal surface in waves of orange and black, flowing like water as it swung down...
Ander jerked his head back at the last moment, and instead of plunging into his face, the blade instead impaled his left hand, piercing skin, meat and tendon. Garten's strike carried so much force it actually drove the blade into the earth underneath, pinning him to the ground like a splinter would pin a bug.
It was strange. Ander's eyes were able to see what had happened to him before his body could feel it. The handle was pressing against the top of his hand all the way down to the finger guard. He couldn't even see the blade, but he knew it was there, beneath the surface. He could feel it inside his hand, pushing the bones of his index and middle fingers apart inside his palm, making it feel like it would split apart. The pain was indescribable.
"How do you like that!?" Garten screamed in his face. He grabbed Ander by the throat and pushed his head up, forcing him to look into those crazy inflamed eyes, the mesh of veins standing out a brilliant red inside the yellowish whites. "To hell with Banno! I'm gonna do what he couldn't! I'm gonna kill you, Ander! And I'm not gonna do it for your dead brother, or for the Chieftain, or for the tribe, or for anybody! I'm gonna do it for myself, you hear me!?"
Ander reached for the knife's handle with his free hand, but Garten stomped down on it immediately, grinding his wrist into the dirt with his foot.
"Oh, I'm sorry. You didn't want that, did you?" He leaned in close, almost close enough to kiss, and he smiled, stretching his lips until all the blisters popped and blood ran freely into his open, gap-toothed mouth. "You know what, Ander? Once I'm done with you, I'm gonna go after the fox bitch that started all this. I'm gonna find her... and I'm gonna wrap my hands around her scrawny little neck... and I'm gonna tear her head off..."
He shouldn't have said that.
The fury. The rage. The uncontrollable anger. It was coming back, stronger than ever before, and it felt good. His whole body was shaking with it. He tried to lift his left hand, straining hard against the dagger pinning him down. The finger guard dug painfully into his hand, and he could feel the blade's serrated edges scrape against the bone, shooting vibrations up his entire arm. The pain was excruciating, but in the red haze of bloodlust, even this unbearable sensation felt so good.
"Die now," Garten said. "You murderer... you betrayer... hated by everyone you once called family..." He opened his mouth wide, thin ropes of saliva and blood connecting his upper and lower jaws, twin rows of jagged teeth that could snap a doe's neck with a single bone-crushing bite.
Ander ripped the dagger out of the ground in a shower of bloody dirt clods and closed his fist in the most unorthodox grip ever, with the handle protruding out of the back of his hand and the blade sticking out between the knuckles of his index and middle fingers. Blood ran down his arm in a torrent, but seeing Garten's eyes widen in shock made it all worth it.
Do it Ander... Do it now... a voice whispered inside his head, a strange, quiet voice he's never heard before. Stick it in his eye... Feel the way it resists slightly before yielding completely. You know the sensation I speak of. Feel the blade pass through his eye socket and into the soft meat of his sick, twisted brain. After he tried to do the same to you, it's only fitting. What did he call it? Poetry? Yes... Why not give him what he wants? You can recite for him a beautiful poem, written in his own blood by the blade of the one who was trying to save him. You know you want to... You've done it before, and you liked it...
No! Ander could see the blade rise up into the air, could feel his arm moving, but it was as if he had no control over it, like he was just a powerless spectator inside his own body_. I didn't like it! That was the worst experience of my life! I never want to do anything like that again! Ever!_
Are you absolutely sure you didn't like it? Not even for a moment?
Yes, I'm sure!
But you like Kiana, don't you?
Things were speeding up now. His arm had almost reached its apex! He would have to make a decision soon, and he only prayed he would have enough sense of self left when the moment came so he would be able to make that decision for himself, and not be swept away by whatever he was becoming.
This Wolf, this loathsome, hateful creature... He attacked your little brother. He's lying in Shekka's tent right now with a giant cut in his stomach, fighting for his life. Or who knows? Maybe he's already dead. Quite possible. Just look at all the blood still lying around. His blood. Your blood. It's all the same, in the end. The blood that flows through your veins is the same blood that flows through your brother's, so when Garten cut Hezzi, didn't he also cut you?
That was painfully true. When Ander saw Hezzi fall, it felt like it was his own body that had been torn open.
And what about Kiana? Didn't you make her a promise? You promised that you would protect her, that you would keep her safe. This thing called "Garten" just threatened to decapitate her, and I'm sure he could do it, too. Are you really going to allow that to happen? Are you just going to roll over and die and let this monster make all your sacrifices meaningless? Aren't you doing all this for her? Isn't that why you're lying half-dead in a pool of your own blood right now? So she and her family can keep on living without fear of being ransacked in the middle of the night by a band of bloodthirsty marauding Wolves!?
Yes... that's exactly what he's doing this for...
So, by killing Garten right now, you're actually saving the ones dear to you. That's a good thing, Ander. That's a pure thing. There's nothing wrong with that.
The blade was slippery with his blood, and his blood was gritty with bits of sand. As he tightened his grip, he could feel them slide smoothly across the metal and roll roughly between his fingers.
Garten's mouth was still open, his breath a foul fume that reeked of smoke, burnt fur, and old shreds of spoilt meat. His watery eyes darted from the dagger in Ander's hand to the nape of his neck.
There was no time left. Ander had to act right now.
He had to protect everyone...
Yes! That's right! Do it! Protect everyone... Plunge that knife through Garten's head! Let his eyeball explode! Let it go all the way through and out the other side!
But...
Do it, Ander! DO IT!!
But I'm not a murderer!
YES YOU ARE! YOU MURDERED ME IN COLD BLOOD!
What?
DO IT, ANDER!! KILL HIM!! KILL HIM!! KILL THEM ALL!!!!
Garten lunged for Ander's neck, his jaws agape, slamming into him with enough force to bowl him clean over onto his back.
Ander brought Nilia's blade down with every last ounce of strength he had left just as Garten clamped his teeth around his throat.
There was pain, followed by an ear shattering crack of bone, impossibly loud, and Garten's immense weight pressing down on his body... and then the warmth of fresh blood...
Sorry for the late update, everybody. A horde of rampaging ostriches swept through town, so I spent all of yesterday barricaded inside the local bar with a ragtag group of survivors, all of whom kept throwing dirty looks at me whenever I decided to whisper sweet nothings into the barrel of my shotgun, who I came to call Agatha. There was a hairy moment when a bunch of the mutant feather dusters tried to bust through the door, but we managed to placate their hunger by chucking a virgin at them.
But good news! The attack only lasted twenty-four hours, there were only nine fatalities (that's 40.9% better than last time), and repairs are already underway. The ostrich bastards did break into my apartment (don't ask me how they got past the gate and up the stairs), but it would seem they were only interested in my stash of Pringles and Stracciatella ice-cream, so my laptop (and therefore my story) made it through unscathed.
If you enjoy my story, please help keep my face un-mauled by irritable ostriches by dropping me a donation.
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