FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

Jonas reached out to Alexos if begging him for help. He tried to speak, but he couldn't - The blade was lodged too deeply into his throat. He would never speak another word. The blood that gushed from his mouth and neck grew deep around them, swiftly forming a bottomless crimson pool.

Alex was drowning in the blood. It washed over him, coating his pure white fur, cutting off the air.

"Please, stop. Help!" He struggled to reach up into the freezing air above the thick, warm bloody pool. A hand grasped hold of his tightly and pulled him above the surface.

"Thank you." He gasped out, hunched over and unable to see his savior.

"Don't thank me yet, child. Beg me not to kill you."

His eyes widened as he looked up into the face of Jonas's murderer. The panther's face was etched with hatred and anger. Bark brows drew together over scarlet eyes nearly the same color as the blood he had spilled.

"Beg me." He said again, digging his fingers painfully into the fox's throat, hard enough to easily bruise and severely restrict breathing.

"P-please don't kill me! I'm sorry. I didn't tell anyone. I swear it. I didn't tell a soul I didn't do anything. Please don't hurt me!"

He grinned at the fox, turning Alex's blood to ice. "But I want to hurt you. I want you to suffer. Put you in your place." He shoves the fox back down. Alex shrieked as the murdered boy himself took hold of the fox's ankle and began pulling him deeper into the ocean of death.

Alex woke up screaming. He was twisted in a soft wool sheet that Mikael must have covered him with in the night. His fur was damp with sweat, his heart pounding in his ears. He looked frantically about the room, the foreign surroundings so different from his own room that before reality caught up with him made him even more frightened.

He lay prone on the floor, having fallen off the couch when he awoke. But he was alone. It was only a dream. A nightmare.

The very same nightmare that would be with him for the rest of his life, no matter how long that may be. So vivid. So real. But just a nightmare fueled by endless guilt. He let out a long, shaky sigh and crawled back up on the couch, curling up in a ball and pulling the cover back around himself.

If there was a chance to change it, he would have told Jonas to step in and stop the tiger's bartering. His posturing. He would have put an end to it before it had a chance to escalate to such a horrible, deadly level.

He knew he couldn't get back to sleep, but he stayed there, curled up, shaking slightly as he tried to keep calm. There was absolutely nothing left of his former life. Everything would change now. He held back all the tears and tried to think of anything other than what happened the day before. But he failed at both.

His body racked with the sobs, and his only saving grace was that because of the sheet covering him, even Mikael couldn't see him crying. Couldn't see his weakness. Eventually he stopped crying, was so exhausted he couldn't manage anything but to lay there.

Mikael got a late start, and when he saw the lump on the couch, silent and under the sheet, he let him be. The fox needed his sleep. He instead went into the kitchen and started cooking breakfast for them. Nothing too fancy, and it was clear that he didn't have much skill in the trade, but he tried. When Alex finally calmed down and smelled the food, his hunger drew him from hiding and he shuffled drowsily into the kitchen and sat down quietly at the table.

Mikael made the plates and turned around, setting one in front of Alex and then sitting down across from him. "Good morning." He said cheerfully.

" 'Morning," The fox mumbled back before starting to eat, wolfing down his meal. The husky looked almost amused at this and started eating himself, albeit at a much slower pace.

After they were done, Mikael got up and brought their plates to the sink and started doing dishes. Alexos just sat there, feeling extremely awkward and slightly in pain. I think everybody has felt an awkward silence building up and not known what to do about it, but not many people can claim that they felt an awkward silence building in a stranger's home, waiting to be interrogated.

So he sat there, fidgeting occasionally to keep all the pressure off any particular part of his body. Soon, however, Mikael was done with the dishes and turned around again. He sat down in the same seat and looked over at the fox.

"So...?"

Alexos looked up at him, the steel returning and masking everything away. "Yes?"

"What happened?" The husky seemed almost concerned for him. He wanted desperately for this not to be so. It would be so much easier having nobody care, having nobody to lose. The fox sighed deeply. "What happened? Everything. Everything changed. Everything hurts. Everything..." His nightmare comes back suddenly, unwanted, but pushing through until it's the only thing he can think about.

But he keeps the tears from falling. His voice catches slightly, but nothing else shows any sign of the meek, passive fox he was just yesterday. "You can tell me. Trust me."

With a extraordinary effort, he pushed everything away, locked it up as tight as he could before he met the husky's eyes. His own showed nothing. No emotion at all. Just amber voids. "How can I trust you. How can I believe anything - anyone - When everybody has a side of the story. When everybody has a lie to tell."

Mikael looked as if he had been slapped. He just sat there with his ears down, looking at the fox. "I took you in - I didn't have to do that. I fed you, cleaned your wounds, clothed you... and you think of me as a liar. One to hate?"

"I never said I hated you." The emotions were starting to get through again. He would have to work on masking his emotions much more, and as soon as possible. "Just that I don't trust you. I don't trust anybody. Have to question everything..."

Mikeal's ears perked up and he cocked his head as if confused. "What happened?" He asked again.

Alexos sighed deeply, fighting to hold back the tears, refusing to answer. Mikael sighed and stood up. "If you won't answer my questions, then you should go. Who knows what you got into. I probably put myself at risk even bringing you home with me."

"...He died." The fox's voice was strained, wavering. "I didn't stop it. I didn't end it. And now he's dead."

Mikael looked back at him as he started talking, his expression changing from that on puzzlement, to surprise, then finally to a sort of sympathetic sadness. "Who?"

Alex shook his head, almost violently. It caused his growing headache to get suddenly worse. He grimaced, closing his eyes and willing everything to just go away. Leave him alone. Let the last day just be erased.

He opened his eyes slowly, trying not to let anything show in his eyes, knowing he was failing miserably. It was impossible, he thought then. To deal with everything. To keep everything inside. His mind wandered to suicide only briefly.

That thought alone sent a shock through him and he was able to clear his mind for a moment. To kill himself. Could he really do that? Yes. Just thinking about it brought dozens, even hundreds of very easy ways he could do it.

But would he be able to? Could he make himself do it, actually go through with it? He hoped that he never had to find out.

Bringing his attention back to the husky, he shook his head again, slower, carefully. "I can't say. I'll get in trouble. He'll come after me."

Mikael sat back down and put his arms on the table, leaning into them as support. "If he's dead he can't come after you. You're safe."

But the fox just shook his head again. "Not him. Him."

Now the husky was even more confused, and getting a bit irritated. "What aren't you telling me?"

"I didn't tell you anything." Alexos gets up, obviously nervous and starts to head for the door.

All Mikael had to do was reach out and stop him. Alex felt so small, so useless. "I'll get my answers one way or another, Alex. You might as well just tell me."

He tried to fight, but even against one of the husky's hands, his full strength barely did anything to the near iron grip. All Mikael did was curl his arm around the fox's waist and hold him there. Soon, he realized that this whole situation was one he wasn't going to win, and he calmed, keeping still.

Mikael went to let him go, and he tried to bolt again, only to be stopped. He growled slightly, but nothing more happened.

"Please..." He tried pleading with Mikael.

"You're acting like a toddler. Just tell me."

"I can't. He'll hurt me... and you."

The husky looked over at the fox. Alex's ears were down and he looked absolutely miserable. "Look at me." He did so. "Nobody's going to hurt you. Nobody else is going to know. Just tell me what happened."

He retreated slightly, and Mikael let him. "Please let it go."

The husky shook his head and sighed. "I have to go soon. You can't be here after I do. I might want to help you when you're hurt, but I can't trust a stray. Especially one that doesn't tell me things and I found covered in blood and running from something."

Alex nodded. He knew this couldn't last forever. The only question now was... What next?