FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

I spent the next hour or so stewing and silently fuming. I ended up at my desk finishing most of the work except the science report. It required several days of class observations which I had only seen one on Wednesday, missing both Friday and Monday. I had no clue what I was really supposed to write about, Wednesday seemed like months ago now. All I really remember was something about changing reactions and how he had ground sugar down then lit it on fire causing a big burst of flame and a dark gray mushroom cloud.

There had been several quiet knocks on my door from time to time all of which I had ignored. My stomach growled again but I ignored that too. Sighing and stretching I came up with the idea that I felt dirty, even though I had taken a show that morning after all the cleaning my fur had pickup loads of dirt and grime from the garage. I rummaged through my drawers for something to wear coming across the pair of ripped pants I had shoved in the bottom drawer of my dresser that were supposed to have gone to my parents room. I wondered for a moment if I should give them to dad or just toss them out. Pressing them back in and closing the drawer I found other clothes and headed to the bathroom.

As I was stripping there was a polite knock on the bathroom door and a female voice that called my name. I quickly reached in and turned the water on before I peeled off my socks and stepped inside. I admit I never really like taking showers all the wet fur is such a pain but as I stood under the water as it pounded on my back with heat that was slowly seeping into my skin it felt good to just let my body relax with the wash of water.

I pulled two big towels out of the cabinet and began a long process of drying and brushing out all my fur. I probably spent over an hour in the bathroom compared to my normal, what mom had dubbed, the fifteen minute sluice and fluff. I definitely felt clean and had sleek nearly glowing fur. Only on picture day was I this glossy. Pulling on a pair of jeans I gathered my clothes and towels and went back to my room to dump them in the hamper and finish dressing. I finally went back to the living room and was surprised to see only James sitting on the couch watching some movie on T.V.

Seeing me walk through he said, "Julie just got here and everyones outside fussing over her baby and Lisa is now sulking in the back bathroom." He got up with the commercial and walked past me going to the hall and the bathroom while I considered what he said. Aunt Lisa was sulking... okay and Julie was here. Noted, and checked more invaders. I was shocked to still smell pizza when I went to the kitchen but the scent was not just some cheese but a whole supreme smell.

In the kitchen I found four boxes stacked on the table but before I even got near I was told, "Don't you Dare!" I turned to see my aunt Yellow, yes Yellow her parents had actually named her that. Albert's wife fur color was cream, I could only guess that her fur had changed at some point after she was born unless the name had some other meaning. Her fur was soaked down her arms as she was drying off a plate which she added to the stack on the sink counter. "We are all waiting and eating together for dinner so no picking."

I nodded and walked around her grabbing a glass from the over head cupboard and filling it with water from the sink before I chugged it down. I felt its heaviness drop into my empty stomach and refilled the glass going back towards my room. I had almost made it to the hall when I heard the front door crash open and the tail and back end of a tom that was carrying in some kind of playpen or something and quickly darted down the hall before I was drafted for more work.

I waited and waited still ignoring the two different times some one knocked on my door. There was a great deal of noise on the other side of my wall in the dining room but it wasn't until I heard the clunk of plates on the table that I got ready to leave. I gave them several more minutes waiting to see if someone was going to come back and tell me dinner was served but no one came. My three cousins were already chowing down in the living room seeming to be nearly done while the rest of my family and the two otters were taking the eight seats at the dinning room table all eating and chatting. I gave nods to Julie and her husband as they said polite hellos through food and went to the kitchen.

Shock and surprise, four empty pizza boxes.... Not even one piece remained unclaimed as I rechecked the four boxes. I did quick math looking at the box in front of me since from the grease I could tell the box contained eight slices. Eight times four is thirty two.... Divided by 12 should have been about two and a half or so but with eleven people each taking three there would be at least one left until I realized my mistake. Eleven times three is thirty-three meaning nothing left. I stepped back into the dining room and looked at the table, no serving tray so no pizza there were still several untouched slices in front of some of them but it seemed that most of what had been brought was totally devoured.

"You can eat in the living room or grab a chair and sit with us." By father spoke. 'Eat?' he didn't realize there wasn't anything to eat and sitting in the middle on the backside he was probably one of the first to sit down.

"Allen kids should be sitting in the living room not eating with adults." Lisa spoke in an almost lecturing tone. A rather audible spit/hiss came from the living room telling me Leanne did not consider herself a kid.

I checked the table one more time even though I knew what the results were. Looking through the fridge and freezer I found nothing really. We usually shop on the weekend and this one hadn't gone so well. All that was left to eat was questionable leftovers and the few frozen rocks I wasn't going to choke on either while everyone else ate pizza. I grabbed on of the apples from earlier and dug my thick nails in squeezing and watching as the juice squirted out onto the shelf.

I closed the fridge and suddenly had the thought of reopening it just so I could slam it shut. They all wanted to eat as a family but didn't bother to make sure I got anything. With nothing but the apple and a strong scent of pizza I stomped back though the dining room. Conversation stopped by the time I entered the living room and the stomping of my paws was all I heard all the way back to my room. I turned and slammed my door way harder than I ever had before tilting my ears back to try to block most of the noise. Instead of closing it bounced back open so I had a chance to slam it closed again. This time it stayed shut and I stood there sucking on the mangled part of the fruit before biting in. I stood watching the door hoping someone would open it just so I could slam it on them, or throw the apple then slam it on them, or scream, throw the apple and slam it.

It took a few moments and most of the apple before there was a light knock at the door. "Ben?" Father fine, I took a step forward and reached out clicking the lock. As far as I was concerned all of them go go to hell right now. I could tell he was still on the other side and probably for once had no clue what to tell me nor had he anything to say. I stood there listening carefully for like five minutes before I finally heard him move off down the hall.

My head was starting to pound and I squeezed my eyes shut, there was no way I was leaving my room even for some pain medication. If I was going to suffer then I would suffer all the way. I kicked off my shoes and laid down.

I cried some and cursed some. Mainly I just wanted all of them out of my house or maybe it was I wanted mom back so they wouldn't be here in the first place. But the part that still infuriated me the most was hearing Yellow tell me. "We're all going to eat together as a family." Well it seems first come first serve and screw the family was the way things really went.

I had dozed off and was startled awake by noised that I could tell weren't normal. A heavy click and bright light blasted in to the dim hole I was in. The shadow in the doorway was easy to recognize as my father. "Ben are you okay?"

"No." My voice was still thick and sounded somewhat choked as I tried to clear my throat. "Anything you want or need? My father asked.

I stopped for a moment it was mean, cruel and hurtful but I said it anyway, "You to leave." He stood for only a few seconds before backing out and quietly closing the door. I was awake now and could hear several low voices talking in the hall. I didn't care who it was it was far to late for an apology in my thoughts. Quietly I crept to the door 'CLICK' the lock sounded extra loud as I flipped the little knob.

Silence, maybe I could have almost smiled If I wasn't still felling like crap and my head pounding. That simple act of locking the door had totally shut them out in my mind and shut them up as well.

I peeled off the pair of jeans figuring my underwear was good enough for now and I went back to bed pulling the covers over myself. It was easily dark enough in my room to sleep but the constant different noises, thumps, and movement through the house kept me from drifting off and I ended up tossing and flopping around till at least one am or later so the alarm clock said.

Finally I suppose I dozed off because was suddenly looking at 5:12 in glowing numbers and I had to pee. Carefully getting up and as quiet as possible I crept to the bathroom went and silently returned to my room. I was hungry, real gut pain hungry but knew there was no way to the kitchen with out waking several people up who were likely sleeping in the living room. Thinking hard I finally came up with what I thought was a good plan. I opened my window and, in nothing but the pair of jeans I had slipped back on, crawled outside.

It was easy once I had scrambled threw the window to get around the house and make my way to the side of the house and the garbage cans. The door was still unlocked since I had not stopped to lock it the day before. Closing the door I turned on the light and stepped inside the pantry.

After a little searching I grabbed the flour and brown sugar tins along with the little can of baking powder then looked through the spices picking out the vanilla and banana flavorings along with cinnamon and the treasured ¼ bag of chocolate chips. I left the laundry room light on as I carried my load into the kitchen also flipping on the small light over the sink. Enough light for me to cook with and hopefully not disturb anyone.

My first thought had been just to make a few pancakes and dash back to my room before the scent brought anyone. But I realized it would make a far better point to make everyone breakfast and be sure there was enough for all. I pulled out milk, eggs, butter and the last few strips of bacon. Carefully and quietly I slowly pulled pans and pots out of the cupboard till I had the grill and a small frying pan. I let the bacon fry in the pan while mixing up batter adding a little banana extract and cinnamon to the mix adding just a handful of brown sugar at the end to make them sweeter.

I had the bowl and everything ready when I fumbled for a cup to get milk and try to wash the solid lump that was constricting my throat from a memory that had overwhelmed me. It had been over a year ago since my mother previous birthday that I had made a near disaster. The night before mother and I had one of our first really big fights that had lead to her locking herself in her room not just sending me to mine. My father and I had talked later and he requested that I be extra nice and really try to make her birthday a happy memorable one.

I had gotten up early and cooked bacon and eggs for her breakfast but while trying to pour the batter on the grill for pancakes the bowl slipped spilling batter onto the range. It had also knocked the frying pan spilling grease out onto the range and starting a small but terrifying fire burning batter and grease and smoking like crazy. My mom walked into the kitchen with the smoke alarm blaring and me trying to pick up broken bits of ceramic mixing bowl that I had in my fright thrown at the fire causing the left over batter to smother the small flame.

She instantly began a yelling tirade about that and everything else from the previous day and every other fault she could think of at the moment. I couldn't help but start crying I had already felt horrible from the evening before actually making my mother retreat to her room and my father who had a long conversation afterwards about being a real man. Add to that my screaming Mother and the fact that I was ruining her birthday before it had really even started made me feel that much worse.

Needless to say I was more than shocked when she had stopped to look at me kneeling on the floor amidst the mess heart sorry sobbing and even more surprised when she knelt down wrapping me up hugging me tightly and apologizing. We probably spent ten minutes crying together before she finally rose and tried to get me up and help clean. I insisted she start on her breakfast of bacon and eggs along with quickly made toast while I cleaned up the mess. She spent an entire hour in the kitchen just watching me work my tail scrubbing the burnt mess of the stove and even mopping the floor giving me a few words of encouragement and some advice at the end.

Back in the darkness of the kitchen I took that advice and found the smaller pitcher in the top cupboard above the sink and poured half the batter inside. I pushed the bowl back thinking that the mix in the pitcher and bowl would likely make about two dozen pancakes. I also had enough ingredients to make a second batch about the same size with vanilla flavoring. Pulling the near burnt bacon out, I loved crispy bacon and just before it burns is the best, I dropped them on to a plate I had set aside to let them cool. Draining just a little grease on to the grill that was now more than warm enough I poured out the first two pancakes extra large dropping a few chocolate chips on top. I cooked them both perfectly as I chewed on the first piece of bacon, light golden brown with dark chocolate spots. I quickly pulled a second plate putting it on the counter next to the stove and pushing the bacon plate to hard almost knocking it of with a crash that would surely alert the household. My quick reflexes had saved the bacon but my elbow had again knocked the frying pan causing a little grease to splash over the edge. With my breakfast secure I quickly turn to the sink for a rag to wipe up the little bit of grease.

Needless to say I stood there slightly stunned at the fact both plates were missing when I turned back around and the clink drew my eyes to the table where aunt Lisa had just set them pulling out a chair to sit down. "Hey that's mine!" I said trying to still keep my voice as quiet as possible hoping no one else showed up.

"Oh no worries you can certainly make more." She responded. "You have butter and syrup right?" she said looking at me, "Oh and some silverware as well." Resisting every single urge to yell, shout, scream, and throw a tantrum on the kitchen floor. I turned off the fire pushed the batter to the back of the range and as calmly and slowly as possible stepped down into the laundry room exiting the side door.

It was just getting light outside as I slipped past the garbage cans and ducked under the kitchen window stopping for a second when I realized there was now a second person in the room. The somewhat bigger frame made me believe it was one of my uncles, who reached out and likely grabbed the final piece of bacon off the table.

I turned in what was nearly a rage and tried stomping off only to step on some kind of stone or rock that was sharp enough to nearly cut into my pad as pain raced up my leg making me bite my lip to stay quiet. Taking more care I limped till I reached the softer grass of the backyard. I walked most of the distance of the house before kinda flopped down to my chest and pressed the side of my muzzle to the grassy earth.

I made a bet with myself, well a sort of guarantee, that they would never even think to look for me until they had all eaten and the food was gone. I was planning on not moving from this spot until someone found me and asked me to have breakfast or what I felt was more likely, was that I would simply lay here until someone came outside and suddenly noticed that I was there. I was sure it would be somewhere along the lines of 'You know I haven't seen Ben yet *Burp *' The only hitch to all this would be my father. He'd probably go looking for me when he didn't see me around and in my mind I now decided that wouldn't count. There wasn't one person in that house who even cared that I was laying on the grass out back.

I just laid there until I was uncomfortable enough to have to roll onto my side. Dawn had passed and I could see lights now were on in my parents room behind the curtains. There was a loud thump and dishes settling that drew my attention since the didn't come from my house. The noise had come from next door not but a few feet away there were light shadowed movements on the lawn that I hadn't noticed. Shelly and her father were making some kind of breakfast in the kitchen. They were either up early or it was much later than I thought.

Totally ignoring my deal with myself I got up and crawled back through my window and with a bit of scrabbling ended up on the floor next to the nightstand. It was only 6:40 and if we went to school together it was usually around seven thirty but we could leave a little early today since I had all my homework to turn in. I quickly turned on the desk lamp and packed up the books and papers into my backpack. I picked out anything else I though I might need for the day including extra writing paper and went to the dresser for clothes. Grabbing what ever was on top and dressing quickly I had everything set and realized that it hadn't even been ten minutes.

If I showed up before seven Mr. Thaner would surely tell me to come back later and likely that would mean I'd have to wait all the way to seven thirty before we could go. I tried to sit patiently on my bed listening to the noises of the house around me, the murmuring from the kitchen side, a sudden slam of the bathroom door, and the rather loud noise that must be the television reporting the news.

I kept waiting, as usual time wanted to add its own personal form of torment as seconds stretched out and five minutes seemed like a half hour. Not being able to wait a moment more I grabbed my backpack and tossed it out the window and crawled out a few minutes before seven. Since I could tell that both Shelly and her dad were still in the kitchen I walked over to the back door instead of around to the front. I took the two steps up and was able to now see both sitting down at a round table. Mr. Thaner was talking and a sideways profile of Shelly was nodding to his words.

My stomach growled looking at the table with the extra slices of toast and what were probably bowls of cereal. With a light tap on the window startling both of them Mr. Thaner quickly got up and yanked the door open. "What are you doing here?" The words were gruff but I didn't sense the usually growl behind them.

"Well I was going to head to school early and turn in my homework. I was wondering if Shelly wanted to walk to school with me." I could see his lips twitch a few times almost like he wanted just to tell me to leave and slam the door. The groaning creak came from behind the big canine as Shelly pushed her chair under the table.

"I'll go get ready." She spoke darting from the room before her father even had time to glance at the clock on the wall. Mr. Thaner stepped back heading to the wall and the phone while pointing at me and a chair as he finished dialing mumbling something I couldn't hear.

I quietly close the door and sat down facing away from him waiting to see what was going to happen. I guess everyone had allowed the phone to ring and ring until my father finally picked up because it was quite a while before he spoke saying, "Is Ben supposed to be here?"........ "He has his backpack talking about going to school.".......... "Breakfast..." I felt as his eyes turned to look at me. I couldn't stop the simple reaction of my head dipping down and my ears laying flat. He grumbled a few more things before hanging up and sitting back down in his place picking up a piece of toast and biting in.

"So you cooked pancakes?" I nodded. "They say they were very good." I nodded again inside the words made me twist but sitting there in front of him they seemed to have very little effect. "To hungry for some toast?" I glanced over at the plate and took one slice hoping my stomach wouldn't start growling like a small jet engine. Before I had finished the slice Mr. Thaner had taken the last one and began cleaning up the table. When he had the dishes were on the counter he spoke, "Your dad didn't know you left the house." I kept still as the water started running in the sink. "It would be bad to make your father worry for no reason. I don't, won't allow you to show up here again like that."

"Okay." I mumbled.

The water stopped and Mr. Thaner took several steps toward the table glaring at me, "You got some problem? You angry with your father or something." I sat for a moment and then suddenly realized I wasn't going anywhere until he some answer that was acceptable.

I took a deep breath to start in but at that moment Shelly walked back in dropping her backpack on the floor drawing both our attention. I could see her looking back and forth between me and her father wondering what exactly was going on with him looming over the table. "They are all over there, they didn't even know I left, it's like they don't care. I just... didn't want to be around them." I had tried to explain but I just ended up shaking my head realizing how stupid I sounded.

Mr. Thaner pulled out a chair and sat down, "And?" It was a prompt for more like he could tell I was hiding something.

"I wanted to yell, scream, tell them they are pissing me off." I had raised my voice some almost hoping for a challenge now that I wanted to vent.

His smile caught me off guard. "Good! In two ways, first your left rather than cause a problem, means your growing up. And good because I think you'd be stupid not to get upset with some of your family." He looked at the clock and I followed his gaze. Seven twenty, "Alright you two, off to school have a good day. And Behave!" He spoke sharply as an afterthought. I grabbed my backpack and nearly fled passing Shelly but waiting for her at the front door as she took nearly a minute to leave the kitchen.

The twenty minute walk to school seemed short. Shelly and I talked about the end of the school term and I gave her the few hints I had about passing the third tier. She brought up my mom once just kinda carefully, "So do you know what extra chores your gonna do, her chores?" My only answer was a head shake. I had no clue but I realized there was still a pile of my clothes on the washer waiting to be done.

Shelly had slowed down hand in her backpack questing for something. "Here take this." She handed over something blue. It was a small kerchief not silly or frilly just a small square of light blue cloth. I wasn't sure if I should take it, I wasn't even sure if I wanted it. "Dad gave me lots and told me, 'Don't need to come home just to wipe away tears or rub off some snot.'" I folded it and shoved it into my pocket. I didn't really want it but I felt this was a gift and I would accept it because it was the meaning behind it. She was trying to help me out already knowing what I was going to have to go through.

Guys aren't really supposed to cry even though I was always told it was good to cry if you have a decent reason to and I had one, one of the best, but I suddenly realized it would be better to have a way to wipe away tears than have wet fur showing that you'd been crying.

A quick round at the teachers lounge and checking in two classes had all my homework returned to the teachers with the exception of the dreaded science paper which I tried to just forget about. Only two of my teachers inquired about my absence and I told them I had been rather sick. The only one to question further had been Ms. Ashton "Seriously sick?"

"I spent three days in the hospital." I answered truthfully.

"Then why are you back at school already?" She demanded.

"As long as I take it easy I will be fine." I replied. After taking a seriously long look inspecting every part of me she could she told me to go straight to the nurse if I felt at all funny.

It wasn't until first period that I started getting little twinges of hunger again. I asked for a bathroom pass and was let out of class for a few minutes early. Taking several long swallows at the fountain I was able to quiet my stomach and take a leisurely walk to my next class. It seemed that trick didn't work very long as my stomach started grumbling not even twenty minutes into the next class and I asked to use the bathroom again. After drowning myself and feeling bloated with water I returned to class. The remark from Mr Lenord was if I was trying to make some record for the fastest bathroom break coming back just a few minutes later instead of the usual five plus most students took. The fact was the fountain was right around the corner were the mens bathroom was at the far end of the hall.

Well water, water and the fact that I really hadn't been to the bathroom for hours had me needing to go badly before the class was over making me wiggle and my tail twitched erratically behind me. Catching my teacher attention and learning the problem he stated. "No Ben I have never given two passes to a student in one class."

"Potty boy!" the jeer came from somewhere behind me. "Honestly Ben did you go earlier?" He asked.

"No."

"What exactly did you do then?" My teacher questioned. Whether I wanted to or not I was going to have to explain to someone or at least my friends why I had been gone for several days.

"I drank some water I umm.. Didn't bring a bottle with me." Maybe Mr Lenard thought I was making some joke in his class because he started to become upset.

"Water.. You went for water." The tone was one that had the entire class silent and still.

Thinking fast I reached a quick solution. "Yes, Doctors orders, and I was very thirsty." He began tapping his pen on the desk top something he usually did to alert us time was almost up whether for a test or the end of class.

"How exactly is it doctors orders, some note or something I'm sure?"

"No, I was in the hospital for three days and was running a fever of almost 108. When I left on Sunday it was rest and water, orders directly from the doctor. I was bored at home so I promised Dad to take it easy and drink lots.... but I forgot a water bottle." I finished explaining figuring a bit of lying would likely help.

"Really 108 temp and nothing happened?" Mr Lenord had a snide little smile and a sarcastic tone that I'm sure had several of the other students grinning.

"No, I umm.." I looked strait at him taking a second to gather myself. "It was three ice baths and I was totally unconscious on Saturday. They weren't sure if I would wake up at first or if there was any serious damage." His frown when I looked at him faded as I spoke. Then he seemed to spend the same moment that Ms. Ashton spent examining me.

"You probably shouldn't be in school." He spoke quietly.

"The doctor said I could go back Wednesday as long as I took it easy. Also I have no wish to repeat the tier so I can't miss any more school." I tried squeezing my legs shut suddenly feeling the pressure build for a moment before I started to wiggle again.

Mr. Lenord had stood up sliding a few books on the shelf behind him and pulling out a thick plastic orange bottle. "Take this and hurry up and go. I expect you back before the class ends."

Running down the hall I made it to the restroom and was still shaking while relieving my over full bladder. I filled the bottle at the sink and took a long slow sip still feeling my body almost quake as I started a quick walk back to class. I made it back with one minute left hearing Mr Lenord tapping out on the desk signaling his students to start packing up.

Even as the bell rang several students were pressing me about my illness, "Did you really almost Die?" The question was asked that stopped everyone to listen for the answer.

Taking a breath I answered, "Yes they weren't sure what was going to happen on Friday night."

"Wow dude you know...."

"Ben... I'll need to talk to you for a few minutes after everyone has left." It was a clear dismissal for anyone not named Ben. With all the students moving out I stepped forward and took the first seat in the row.

There were still a few students moving for the door when Mr. Lenord started, "Ben, bored or not, doctors approval or not, even worrying about failing a tier I don't think you should be in school. You seem worn and I can tell you've lost some weight, you face even looks pale and drawn."

Worn that felt like a good name at the moment. It was as if his words had made the truth known and I felt weak and almost shaky. "I'm asking you to stay here till the break is over, then head to you next class." I just nodded fifteen minutes here wasn't a problem and my next class was just two rooms down. I took a sip from the bottle and leaned back into the desk.

It seemed the time pasted quickly and as I picked up my backpack to leave Mr. Lenord asked, "Do you have any activities classes?" I shook my head, "You should sit down for the entire lunch time. When you leave the cafeteria find somewhere quiet to sit if you need to come back here." I nodded again and left.

Third class went smoothly until I started feeling hot and flush. I asked for a bathroom pass and Ms. Ashton didn't even ask a question only as I stood my legs were so shaky I could barely make it a few feet before I nearly stumbled catching myself on a neighboring desk still trying to make it to the front of the room. It was like I could suddenly feel my heart pound out and a humming started around me muffling the question the teacher posed. I realized I was on my knees staring at the floor and then on my side, something was wrong... again... but it was totally different a new sickness or problem as things seemed to grow quiet.

I was yanked to my feet and propelled out of the class. I thought maybe I had passed out since it was Mr. Lenord's strong arms that were tucked under my own keeping me upright. When we were in the hall I stumbled and almost fell before it felt for a moment like I started flying until I realized the bouncing motion meant I was being carried. As the movement continued things started to spin more and then darkness.