Chapter 1

Daniel

I awoke to the sound of soft snoring, after an endless and dreamless night. My head felt heavy and I felt like shit to say the least. My mind was sluggish and it took me a few minutes to realize I was in my own bed. I remember Roger having invited me out drinking with him at this new club downtown. It had been weeks since I last left my apartment.

Although my mind was a bit hazy, I was able to remember going to the bar and having a few drinks, but that was as far as my memory would go. I also don't recall ever having left the club. I attempted to sit up, but was struck by a sudden wave of nausea. Then came the damned migraine that comes after a night of excessive drinking.

After recovering from the bout of dizziness, I took a moment to take in my surroundings. The sun was trying to shine through the blinds with little success. The room was dimly lit as always. No matter how sunny it was outside, the light could never get through. The first thought that came to mind was, "At least Chase and I made it home this time."

I felt a familiar warmth lying beside me. A smile crept upon my face as I wrapped my arms around my husband.

I was happy.

Everything felt right.

At that exact moment of happiness, a sound broke the silence. It was a chuckle. The deep rumbling that was painfully similar to Chase's own deep, if not deeper voice. However, this wasn't Chase lying beside me. It was a stranger. The person wasn't even a wolf, like Chase. This man, this stranger, was some kind of dog breed. He was chuckling at me.

"I didn't think a coyote like you would be the type to want to cuddle," he said, his voice rather rough. "You seemed like the kind of guy who'd just wanted to get in my pants."

The happiness had all but left me by now. I almost started crying, but I was stronger than that. I gave a low, weak chuckle. I almost didn't believe it came from my own muzzle. "I didn't realize I came across as such a downer," I said in a failed attempt at a joke.

His voice rumbled again in a chuckle. "I was joking bud," he laughed.

"Oh." I replied awkwardly, now looking at the ceiling. I felt tears begin to burn my eyes. Thoughts of Chase were resurfacing again. I felt the tears push even more at my eyes. I shivered slightly before sitting up. I felt a shifting on the bed as he turned himself over to face me. I continued to look up.

"Well -," he began. But I cut him off.

"Look, I'm sorry, but I'm gonna have to ask you to leave now." I finally looked at his face. Two things struck me when I saw him. First of all he was handsome. More so than I deserved. That bothered me. I wasn't good enough to be a stud's sex toy. The second thing that struck me was his hurt expression. I was immediately stricken with guilt. How could I be such an asshole to someone who, up until now, had been so polite?

The events of last night had slowly returned to me, proving me to be more of an ass. I distinctly remember him asking me if I wanted to use a condom, just lube, or both. I chose to use both.

Both of us were clean. I knew I was, 'cause I haven't left the apartment and no one would sleep with a beat-up looking guy like me. I knew he was clean because he told me. Plenty of times last night. Particularly when he asked if I'd want to use a rubber. Although my memory's fuzzy, I remember not caring, just grunting as I continued smashing my muzzle to his, trying to get his clothes off.

I was drunk, wasted. He was buzzed, at best. I tried to shut him up with my muzzle. I wanted him. I needed him. He was merely there for the fun of a one-nighter.

I sat up, looking away from his direction and looked around the room. Saying it was mess was a sad understatement. Clothes all over, especially building up in the corner by my bathroom door, a large pile of old dishes piling up on my desk, and embarrassingly, a stack of Heat mags and a tower of old and... used, tissue paper. I looked away from the trash bin and the offensive material.

I saw that the dog had sit up and grabbed his nearby button up shirt which was torn and tattered. I ripped his rather nice black shirt to shreds, and tore a hole in his jeans out of frustration because I couldn't remove the God forsaken garment. Another guilt trip.

"Hey man, I'm sorry. For snapping at you, and for the shirt and jeans. I'm just... Going through some shit is all." I apologized. He looked at me, understanding evident on his face.

"Naw, it's fine. I understand. Bad break up?" I shook my head. He kept his soft gaze on me, as if analyzing me. "What's wrong then?" he asked me, his voice somewhat worried. It seemed as if he were sort of concerned. I inhaled a sharp breath of air as I debated whether or not to tell him my problems.

"Nothing you need to worry about." I said, releasing my bated breath. He looked skeptical, not exactly trusting my word. The corner of my lips turned up slightly in a small smile because I was glad for the amount of concern for me he has shown up until now.

"Come on, I don't mind listening to you, ya know. I am a therapist after all." He chuckled a bit, and I looked at him, one eyebrow raised in disbelief.

"Are you really?" I asked.

"Yup." He looked at me and smiled. My confusion was probably evident on my face. He chuckled again and patted my leg. "Hey, just cause I'm a therapist doesn't mean I can't have a little fun. I'm allowed to sleep around."

"Oh..." I replied softly, my smile now completely gone. After he realized what he said negatively affected me, he tried to take it back.

"Hey man, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that."

"N-no... No, it's fine. I shouldn't expect more than sex out of a one nighter." I got up and headed towards the dresser. I opened the drawer and pulled out one of Chase's old t-shirts, tossing it in the dog's direction.

"Here. This should fit you." We are both silent as he stands, t-shirt in hand. The covers fall, revealing a beautiful body. Even layers of muscle, minimal body fat, and beautiful light brown fur. I steal a quick glance down at his crotch and begin to flush a little. Everything on him was beautiful. I continue to stare at him in awe before he clears his throat, obviously feeling a tad bit awkward. "Oh...Right. Sorry." I look away, and rummage through the drawers again. I pull out a pair of nice boxer trunks. Ones that Chase always wore around the house. "Here, take these and I'll find a pair of jeans that'll fit you. Just hold on." I walk out of the room and into my closet. I rummage again, taking my sweet time, as I don't exactly want to face him again.

Moments later, I walk back into my bedroom. He's now wearing the slightly tight shirt and hugging boxers. He looks like a Calvin Klein model and a Giorgio Armani model had a lovechild. I sighed and looked into his eyes. They were twinkling with youth. A swell of pain in my heart hits me. "Why would you want me?" I ask quietly. He looks at me, his gaze soft and reassuring.

"Because you're a strong looking, mature man. I like that. It's... different. Most guys come to me, acting like needy sluts. You came to me, confident, sure of yourself. But you were acting almost like we were merely drinking buddies." He then branded a devilishly handsome smirk and continued, "Well, buddies up until you started to kiss me."

I groaned, embarrassed to find out I attacked him. "Oh god, I'm so sorry. I didn-"

He laughed and clapped a paw on my back, "Don't be sorry! I'm glad you did. Last night was amazing, even if you drank half the bar beforehand."

I blushed a little and sighed again. "Look, if you don't mind, I'd like for you to go now. Please."

It was his turn to sigh. He got up and stalked towards the bedroom door, clearly a little flustered that I didn't want to talk to him anymore. Why would he care though? It wasn't like I had known him for very long. Either way, I let him go out the door. He waved a hand goodbye and walked out of my room. But, before he walked out the door, he turned and said:

"Goodbye Daniel." This shocked me because I don't recall ever having given him my name.

I drove my mind to remember exactly what happened the night before. But nothing came to me. Eventually, I had enough (with my headache and what not) and I gave up. I laid back down on the bed, sighing loudly to no one in particular. I closed my eyes, letting my mind drift into a foggy haze filled with memories of lost loved ones.

I'd been thinking a lot about my life for the past week. My parents were gone. My sister and brother barely acknowledged my existence. I didn't have a steady income. My life partner was dead. I had absolutely nothing left to live for. Along with reflecting on my current life, I also had time to think about death. Why was I so immune to death, accidental or not?

Dad had a stroke and died. Mom slipped and hit her head, knocking her into a coma. She has not woken up. Chase, my late husband, died in a car crash.

I, however, have been electrocuted twice, have been in two car accidents, have slipped numerous times, have been burned, and have been shot once in the chest. And... I managed to stay alive. God must be having fun with me, the sadistic bastard. I felt my anger building up in my chest. It was painful to think about all the people I've lost and realize that I had no one to rely on. No one to comfort me. I was alone.

"I'm still here!" I screamed to the ceiling. "I haven't given up yet you bastard!"

I must be going crazy now. I was yelling at my ceiling. There was no one to scream at. God didn't exist. Fuck him. I don't need a god. I didn't need anything from someone who was supposed to love everyone, but couldn't do shit for me. I hadn't even done anything to piss him off. Whatever. I'm tired...

Though I had just woken up not too long ago, I was ready to go back to sleep. I laid my head down and closed my eyes, ready for sleep.

~~~

"Morning Hun."

I smiled, and wrapped my arms around my Chase. "Good morning baby." I replied, inhaling his scent, and feeling his soft fur brush against my own. He moved us around so he was above me, his arms on either side of my head, and looked into my eyes. I felt at ease, yet a growing sadness began to bloom in my heart and my eyes began to tear up. I grabbed him and pulled him into a tight hug. "I miss you so much Hun. I miss how you smell. I miss your fur against mine." My tears began to really pour as I began to list off all the things I missed about him.

"I know babe. I'm sorry. I wish I could be there with you. I wanna comfort you, but I can't and it hurts me. I love you...

"I love you too, Chase. More than you'll ever get to know." I replied, looking away from him as guilt washed over me. The wolf chuckled and rolled us over, with me resting on top.

_"I know you love me. I've always known. Since the day I first looked into your beautiful eyes. I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you, my little 'yote." A fresh wave of tears and sobs broke out of me at the mention his cheesy pet name for me. My body gave and I fell onto him, my smaller frame wracking against his due to my sobs.

He held me, his arms moving me so he could see into my eyes. "You know, it's been awhile since my accident. You've been alone for months now."_

_I scoff and reply, "I'm not alone... I have Roger..."

Chase looks at me disbelievingly and rolls his eyes. Then he looks back into my eyes, the seriousness returning. "I think you should move on."

I choke back a sob that tries to break through. But I fail, and begin crying again

"I can't..."

"But you can. You will. You have to. I'm not there to protect you now. You need someone to love you."

"But I have you."

"You do. You always will, don't ever doubt that. Not one second." He sighs and hugs me. "But I'm not going to be able to tell you everyday. I won't be able to tell you how amazing you are, how much you mean to me."_

_I hug him to me and hold on for dear life, knowing that once I let go, I'd have to wake up.

"I don't think I can move on. You were with me for so long, I..."_ _I cut myself off as I release yet another sob.

"I love you Chase..."

As I continued to sob, a haze filled my head and I began to lose all feeling. Chase's voice began to fade with a final echo of: "I love you, and always will."_

~~~

I awoke from my heart crushing dream, and found my face tear-stained and my head fur roughly pointing in multiple directions. I turned my head to look at my clock. It was now three in the afternoon. I felt much better now, thanks to my ethereal encounter with Chase. At the thought of him, I subconsciously smiled. My heart wasn't aching nearly as bad for him. My head was no longer cluttered and clouded with negativity.

"Thank you Hun."

I sat up, swung my legs over the side of the bed and stood, stretching dramatically before heading to my kitchen. Once there I made a quick breakfast of cereal: Honey Bunches of Oats with banana slices. I then began to set up a bowl of Rice Crispies with strawberry slices and drizzled slightly with chocolate syrup for Chase. It was only when I finished making our meals that I realized it was a waste of time. Chase was gone.

I stood there for a few moments, my head devoid of emotion. Although my mind was blank, I was vaguely aware of my surroundings. The kitchen was silent, save for the humming of the refrigerator to my left. The air was still, slightly warm, but the linoleum floor was cool to each foot paw. I stared at the table in front of me, looking back and forth between the two bowls of food before me.

Then a tear found its way to the table top. I looked at the bowl designated for Chase, and I began to laugh. I laughed hard at my mistake, forgetting that I didn't need to make two bowls of cereal anymore.

"Heh, I guess old habits die hard, huh, Hun?" I sat down, smiling to myself. I began to eat my slightly soggy breakfast, feeling better than I have in the past few weeks.

I glance towards my fridge and notice something different. There was a little business card stuck there with a magnet. I stood up and walked to reach for the card. It was a small white card with a simple black line for a border. On the card were the words:

Archibald Ganello, P.T., D.P.T. Doctor of Physical Therapy Telephone: (838) 205-0364

I flip the card over revealing a hand written message:

Hey Dan, call me when you wanna talk, please? -Arch

I smile lightly. "Chase, you better be right about me being ready to move on."

I walk back to the dining table and place the card next to Chase's full bowl. I sit in my seat and continue to eat my now mushy cereal.

After finishing my quick breakfast and running through my morning rituals, I go back into the kitchen to check for any messages. I click a button on the machine and in reply, it beeps loudly. The machine then begins to speak:

---

"YOU HAVE 2 NEW MESSAGES. FIRST MESSAGE...:"

"Hey Dan! It's Roger! So I got this puppy here, and have no clue what to do with it. I think you'd like it. I mean, you've never had a dog before... But it shouldn't be too hard for you to care for. I mean, you did have to care for Chase, who, in all honesty, was a handful. Anyways, if you wanna see her, give me a call back. Later!"

"END OF FIRST MESSAGE. SECOND MESSAGE...:

"Umm, hey Dan, it's Arch, the guy from last night. I know that we just met, and I may be a bit too forward, but, uhh, I'd really like to talk to you again soon. Maybe on an actual... you know, date," he lets out a quick, deep chuckle, "Again, call me back whenever you can. Hope to hear from you soon!"

---

I chuckle a bit at the messages. "What the hell is Roger talking about? And this Arch guy seems like a pretty good, decent person. That's good enough of a reason for me."

I place a hand over the small business card, glance at the bowl of mush across from me and release a deep breath. It feels good to be able to finally move on.

=== === ===

To be continued...

Author's Note:

Although I write that this will be continued, do NOT expect a sequel anytime soon. I've not got too much time to write cause college and work sucks like that. I will try to write as much as I can, but I can't guarantee it won't take another year to write anything. =P

P.S. I'd love for some awesome constructive criticism however. :)

EDIT: So, as with my other story, I just could NOT leave it be, and had to reupload my edits. I'm sorry because the second chapter is coming along very slowly seeing as school and work both suck. I promise, I will keep working on it though. I swear!