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i clicked my sticks four times and DJ hit the 3 strings starting Big Wiggly Styles by The Devil Wears Prada.

Condemned My regret is not writing more for you, Lord As this ocean comes to be deeper Our vessel becomes less stable

Look to the sky [Encourage the elements of God] Rather than the jars that contain them [If only the ingredients of man were of such elements]

If only, if only

With great horror, I admit that we all live off the lust and misfortune of others All live off the lust and misfortune of others This is vision, not contradiction I see greed in the face of a priest And deterioration in the walls of cathedrals Cathedrals What was right, now wrong Casts a cold reflection on glory on glory on glory on glory

Look to the sky

i looked up to the crowd in awe at all our fans. the blue lights lit up everything making me smile. i dont know why but this had to be one of the (at least for me) best songs we played yet. as dj finshed the keyboard part the lights came back to the stage, all turned white. the house lights came on as well as the Blinders ontop of the stage faceing out into the crowd. everyone was cheering and jumping up and down screaming for us to do one more. i walked down and huddled up with the rest of the band.

"They want one more... any songs we got that would give them what they want?" i asked looking at the other guys.

"erm.. Louder Then Thunder by T.D.W.P?" Dj said.

"cant sing that one. well not yet." alex said.

"i have it." hayden said looking up.

"eh we want everyone in on this... hmm" i said thinking about a song.

"Derailed by Mindscape..." we all said. we turned around and looked into the crowd. they were all still cheering despite us just standing in a circle for about 2 minutes. we waved to them and walked off the stage and the lights dimed. The screen started turning on behind the kit as i clicked off the next song. the others jumped out of the darkness and started the song.

Here I am Once again Facing the ghosts of yesterdays A past In my life I fear I can't outlast They're inside In my mind A softly whisper leaves me cold So lead me Release me As I'm bleeding tonight

Could you be my sweet escape?

I was wrong I know This time, there's no place left for me To heal me To save me I'm lost again, my only friend

Hayden turnd to me and pointed at me. the camera cought what he was about to do and quickly turned to him and me in the same shoot. our image was quickly put up on the screen as hayden sang to me.

** Would you be my sweet escape?** Make this heart beat again

I need you here tonight All I need is To bring me back to life A new beginning Without you in my life I'd fall apart Derailed

he came around my drum kit and after he sang Derailed he turned my head and kissed my lips infront of the whole arena. i couldnt help but feel a slight blush but kept playing harder then i was. after the song. i had sweat falling down my face. i walked up and put arm around haydens neck and waved to everyone. alex was on the other side of the stage waving to some fans as well as Dj, Marcus and Josh. we all walked off the stage and everything dimed but the house lights telling everyone it was over. me and hayden jumped in to his car and quickly started our way home.

--------------------------------------------------------till (Highschool) --------------------------------------------------------

"HEY TILL!!" a fox yelled out running to me.

"CHRISTOPH!!!" i yelled. he tackled me to the ground and we laid their laughing. Christoph was a fox, normal fox fur, bushy tail, pointed ears and blue/green eyes.

"Chris you reall need to stop tackling me like this." i said poking his nose.

"yeah i know.. but i cant help it! your so dam soft!!" Chris said smiling and poking my nose.

"hey!" i said wiggling my nose. "no touch the the nosepad." i said and licked his nose.

he put his paws over my muzzle. "my sheppie!" he said then kissed my lips.

Christoph was the first person i ever told i was gay. he was the only open gay in Highschool. he got crap for it each and every day, even though he would help every single guy who thew him in a locker just because he was "that kind of guy". after about a year of being out to him i asked him to be my mate. we were sorta already going out because we did everything together, but still i wanted to make it offical.

"so what are we ganna be doing today Misure Kit?" i asked licking his nose.

"Eh i dont know... i think im ganna head home actually i have some stuff that i want to get out to my parents." he said looking at the ground besides us.

i garbed his arm then turnd his head towards mine. "if you want me to i can come with you.. i know that it wont be easy." i said.

his parents were complete homophobes and if they found out who Christoph actually was they would kick him out right away. "no hon i will be fine trust me." he smiled and got up. i walked him to his house witch was about 4 blocks down from mine. after i kissed his cheek and walked him to his door i turned around and started home.

---next day---

"Hey hon!" i said and hugged Christoph.

"... hey...." he said sadly.

"whats wrong."

"nothing.. dont worry about it." he smiled and kissed my lips.

"oh... okay." i said and turnd to walk off thinking about why my mate was so sad... did his parents kick him out. is he just having a bad day?.. gah i wish i knew." i said into my head. when i got to class i sat down in my normal seat next to the window and waited for the day to be done.

sooner then i realized the last bell rang. i ran out to find Christoph but couldn't see him anywhere."hmm where that fox go." i thought out loud.

"HEY!" christoph yelled behind me making me jump and turn around.

"dam it fox!" i said pulling him into a tight hug.

out of nowhere he kissed my lips the deepest he ever had. his tongue moved into my mouth and felt its away around. normal i would have been the one who would do this. 'hmm somethings up' i said to myself. "hon you okay?" i asked looking into his eyes smiling.

"yeah.. im sure everything will be better by the end of the night.. im ganna have..a... really nice long sleep." he said and moved my head closer and kissed my lips giving me one of the most loving kisses i ever had.

"i love you hon." i said holding his waist.

"i love you to.. never.. ever forget that i love you, no matter what happens. i will always be with you." he smiled and we walked over paw in paw. we wint out to eat then to a movie. the hole entire time we kissed so i didint get to really watch the move though. when ever we walked around he would be hugging my arm smiling. but as soon as the night started, it ended.

we walked up to christophs' door and i kissed him one last time. he gave me a even more loving deep kiss then before. his eyes went down and nuzzled my chest. "im ganna miss you so much." he said almost crying.

"we will meet up tomorrow." i said smiling.

"yeah... well i have to go Goodbye hon.. Ich liebe dich." he kissed my lips and walked inside. i smiled and started my way home. after a 10 minute walk i got to my house and into my bed room. i feel asleep with a peace i have never had before.. it was like christoph was right next to me hugging me again. little did i know what had happen to my loving fox....

-------------------------------------------till (presnt year)----------------------------------

i looked down at the last picture i ever got of Me and Christoph. tears rolling down my cheeks, but a smile on my muzzle. it was our 3ed year going out, a week before he came out and we had just gone to a concert. he always looked goo in all black. some say i do to, but i dont see it. he had a huge smile on his muzzle and his arm around my neck with his paw on my arm.

"Chris... why didnt you tell me... why did you have to use rope." i said and put the picture on my nightstand. as i set down the picture i couldnt help but have a flash back to his grave.

everyone w_as crying... well just my friends and his friends. all the others didnt want to say goodbye to a "Fag". _i put a rose down onto his grave and sat down over it. right were the newly planted dirt was put. my friends could tell that i was going to be here a while so they all rubbed my shoulder and smiled as if to say "dont worry hes in a much better place.". i nodded and they walked off. "chris..." i said looking at the grave stone. "chris, why. why didnt you tell me.. why didnt you say something. i would have been their to help you. i would have helped you get though this. i love you hon. even in death i will never stop loving you." when i said that tears fell down my muzzle to the grave. i felt a cold jet of air land next to me.

"hon" it said. i jerked my head to see christoph siting next to me. my mouth flew open and i blinked my eyes.

"ho..how...who...what...are."

"yes hon. but body i_s _gone but my spirit is still alive. also that crap about gays go to hell... total bullshit." he said smiling. he reached over and hugged me. i felt nothing but cold air on my body but then i felt the warmth he would give off if he was here."hon i know i didnt think straight when i did what i did.. i couldnt help it.. all the years of emotion just built up.. and i just felt like i had to.. im sorry." he said.

"i forgive you." i said tears rolling down my eyes. "good.. now move on with your life... i seen what what is instore for my pup.. you will like it." he smiled. "now i have to get back but i will be watching.... trust me. no matter what my eyes are on you.. and your in my heart." he said and kissed my lips. i felt his warmth then he waved and faded away.

"dam it fox i miss you so much.. love you hon.. forever and always" i said then slowly fell asleep.

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