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Chapter 6: Trust

Jason

'This is the place, right?' He looked around the cafeteria but didn't see her anywhere. 'She's late', he thought nervously. He managed to avoid Sam again: he guessed he was already gone by this time, since he finished at midday like him. He waited patiently at the table, his ears twitching constantly from all the noise around him. 'Maybe she was just kidding. Or she figured it on her own and didn't need his help anymore so she wouldn't come... Then again, what other reason would she want to see me?' He was confused now. When he was about to leave and call himself stupid, he heard a feminine voice shout his name over the crowd. 'It can only be her', he thought as he recognized the voice.

The vixen was waving at him as she made his way between the crowded tables. "Hey, sorry, I'm late! I was ambushed by my mother who called me to take up some news of my doings so far."

"Two times in two days?", Jason inquired with his playful tone. "Sounds like a habit to me."

"No, it's not", she said taking it seriously. "I'm really sorry."

'She looks so cute when she apologizes with her tail twitching.' He laughed to himself, though it was still audible for others around. "No problem then, I'm sure your parents really care about you to check up on you like that."

"Yeah...", she said as she sat, opening her lunch.

"So, you live by yourself now?" He got a nod in respond. "What's it like?", he asked with excitement in his eye.

She laughed. "Oh, fine I guess, but I actually live in one of the dorms of college. It's less roomy than an apartment and your bathroom is outside, but less pricy too!"

"I know what you mean: I have checked over the summer through some to see if I could finally have my own place but they were clearly out of the question for my wallet."

"Yeah! The city ones are the worst. I could have afforded one in a lost spot but what I'd do for transport, right?"

"Take a thirty minutes bus ride like I do." He grinned at her while she was struggling to see if he was serious.

"You live that far? Man, how do you do it? I can wake up fifteen minutes before the start of class and still be in time. That's the advantage I guess."

They ate together and enjoyed each other's company as Jason began eying that shaky tail of her. He could almost get dizzy sometimes; he guessed it was her way of expressing herself, like punctuation. After they finished, he was about to propose her to begin, but she had other thoughts.

"Hey, Jason. How about we head out to a place less noisy? It will be easier for us to study."

"I don't mind. If fact, it's a good idea", he responded, following her out of the complex.

Sam

"Saaaaaam!", she shouted when he arrived at the shop. He took a deep breath before heading through the 'employee only' door, making his way to the hanger where his uniform stood. "So, how's it going?", she asked still in his usual mood.

"I'm good", he said with his monotone voice.

"Great, well that's good to... Uh, are you sure?", she asked. "You look tired..."

"No", he calmly responded. "YOU look too awake. It's only job, and I've had four hours of class already. Can't believe I have to work until five. I'll be dead by then."

"Oh, don't be like that." She gave him a wink as she patted him on the shoulder. "We're working together today, remember?"

"Sure I do; that's why I said I'll be drained after my shift: you take all the energy from me by working my ass out to keep up with you", he joked as he'd always see her bounce around while she prepared coffee or refilled the pastries.

"Don't worry; I'll make sure you stay awake! So, tell me about your classes..."

"Alright, I guess. It's not that different from high school, only the periods last longer than usual and you have a variable schedule. Some still looks boring though."

She waited for Sam to continue, but he didn't have anything else to say, really.

"Well, aren't you precise... What is boring specifically?"

"Philo", he recalled. 'Although, it could have been much more fun if he could've talked to Jason again.' It was the time and place to do what they always do: get into an argument over nothing only to prove the other who was better at building theories.

She didn't know quite what to respond to that so she changed subject, hoping to interest his friend instead of annoying him, like he accused her to do so many times.

"Well, anyway, did you catch any movie recently?"

"Not really... Now that I think about it, it's been a while. Last time I went was..."

Sam stopped himself, filled again with the thought of Jason. A sad expression grew on his face and he tilted his head down a little, hoping she wouldn't notice.

"What's wrong? Did I say something?"

"No, it's not that... Sorry, I guess I just remembered something."

Marty brought one paw to his shoulder. She looked worried, and confused. "Are you sure?"

"Ha! Don't worry about me; since when did you get so protective, Marty. I never knew you were that type", he said jokingly.

"What? I've always been this way! Didn't you notice?"

"Oh, I see... You're referring to when I burned my tongue on that stupid coffee and to cool me off, you had to spill me a cup of water all over my face? Yeah, that was sensitive of you."

"Oh come on, I thought you were faking it. I had to do something to get you back; if not for this time, then all the other ones where you pretended to be occupied in the shop while some customers asked me for a box of 80 doughnuts, telling me how much of each flavour to put in. It took me forever and I had to take back the order two times because I mixed up some of the flavours."

"I WAS occupied; I had to...clean up the floor because it was all wet and muddy."

"Yeah, I already caught on your trick. You saved yourself this task so you could run away whenever you want..."

"Maybe", he said with an ironical tone.

They both laughed simultaneously, remembering the great time they had together. 'Thank you Marty... Thank you for making me laugh when I'm down', Sam thought.

"Okay, it's decided then." She pointed her finger at Sam. "You're coming with me tonight."

"Uh? Where?", he asked, unsure of what she had in mind.

"Well at the movie theatre of course! Have you ever seen a 3D movie yet?"

"Um...no", he admitted.

"What?! Then you have to come with me. I'll show you how much you've missed of this century. So what do you say?"

"I'll say I'll really sleep well in my bed after dinner", he teased.

"Oh don't be like that. You won't sleep at all because I won't let you; you'll be haunted by my voice in your dreams if you don't, I just know it!"

"Yeah, maybe, but at least I won't look like a zombie tomorrow morning..."

"Please...", she pleaded with her wet shaky eyes.

"Alright..."

"So you coming?" Sam made a resolved nod addressed to her, making her jump in joy like she usually does. 'She is a bunny after all, so it's kind of uncontrollable. She can't just wave her tail like canines do.'

'Maybe I'll feel better if I go out... It's really been a long time since I've done anything social outside my house except for arcades with Ricky, and even though. Somehow, thinking occupy all my time these days, or rather trying not to, but failing miserably.'

Right then the doorbell rang, announcing a customer. "I'll take it", said Sam. The tiger looked ready to order, so I asked him. "What will it be?" The tiger looked like he was in trance, staring at nothing, but soon snapped out of it.

"Yeah, I'll take a white bagel on cheese please; nothing else."

"Coming right up!" He took the last of the bagel from the display stand and made Marty a sign it was now empty. She understood and disappeared through the back store door. Made it grill, added cheese on it along with mayo and salad. "Here you go." Sam looked at him walk off.

'He seems kind of familiar thought... Ah, right, the guy from biology', he remembered. 'I'll surely meet more familiar faces since it's near school ground, I guess.'

How right was he... He turned his back to see no one get back with the bagels and was about to ask her if she needed help when the doorbell rang again.

"Good afternoon. What will you tak-", he said mechanically before seeing a fox tagging along with that same girl. His fox. 'God, he looks so much more in a shinier mood than the past few days. How much I want him to be like this with me!' Sam actually felt relieve for a moment, the disillusion cause by the smile on his face at that moment making him think in this short instant that everything would be alright; that they'll finally get along again. But he was soon stabbed by his change of mood, the almost imperceptible fade on his lips that was betraying his rancor. He stood there silently behind the vixen, fixating me with his adorable-yet-flowing-of-hate eyes. '"She" didn't seem to notice anything.'

"Yeah, a double coffee please. I've already eaten anyway. What about you Jason? My treat!"

"Han? Ah, I want nothing, really..."

"Yes, you do! Just decide..."

He didn't even look at Sam. He just sighed and said "I'll take the same as her."

"...Sure", Sam replied. He turned around to pour the coffee in two cups, and added some milk, sugar and cream. He could feel a pair of eyes stabbing him in the back while he prepared the order. The vixen handed him a five and he stashed the cash, returning the right amount, and led Jason to a table in the middle of the shop, where there was a blurry glass wall to give the clients more privacy. Sam could only see the vixen from where he was.

Just then, Marty came back from the back store and began to replenish the sales stand. She looked up once she was done and frowned.

"Hey, it's Stephanie... Wonder what she's doing here?" She said, taking a sour voice.

Sam looked up at his face, and seeing where she was looking, he stood up eagerly towards her.

"You know that girl?", he said with a low voice to make sure he wasn't heard.

"Yeah, you know, we used to be in the same class before I dropped out of school. She could be so much of a bitch sometimes!"

Sam looked over to make sure 'Stephanie' didn't turn her head at her rather loud comment.

"Tell me more about her! Who is she? What kind of girl is she? Where does she come from?"

"Woo, calm down. Why do you look so concerned all of a sudden?"

"It's...not important." He shrugged, not wanting to explain the whole situation. He slowed his voice and made his puppy eyes. "Will you tell me? Please..."

"Alright, don't have to be so touchy. I don't really like to talk about it, but if it's you, how can I refuse?" Sam looked confused by her remark, but he stayed silent. "You see...I didn't...really drop out of school. The reason why I no longer go is that I just can't. I got expelled from my old one, because of that bitch over there."

She pointed Stephanie again with her head, followed by an angry look. Sam couldn't believe it: he never thought it was because of someone that she had to abandon school. "Why? What happened?"

"Well, I had a crush on a guy. His name was Shen. I knew he was interested in me, and so we flirted with each other for a while. What I didn't know was that she had an eye on him too, and that two weeks before, she tried to approach him so she could sleep with him. He told me once she tried everything she could to convince him otherwise as he always answered he wasn't interested. Pulled out the crappiest lies to try and win him over, like: 'oh, I'm Stephanie and I just arrived this year from Brazil; you're so good in algebra, could you give me a hand; I wear a skin-tight top because it's really hot where I come from. I kind of got the habit now, I hope you don't mind...' Anyway, he saw right through her and politely pushed her away, saying she wasn't the kind of girl he wanted."

She took a pause, trying to reorganize her thoughts in her head. Sam looked over at the vixen, laughing with HIS fox. 'Is she coming on to him?', he thought. "What happened next", he found himself asking.

"Once we finally dated, Shen and me", she continued, "she wanted to talk to me in private after class. She said that if I was to be going out with 'his' man, I would regret it. I laughed at her at that time, not taking the threat seriously. I told her she was just angry because, for once, her boobs weren't enough to win a man over. She looked furious that day and she walked away."

Marty sighed, taking a break, but Sam's eyes were pleading her to continue. "I really became comfortable around Shen. We were going out, and soon I gave myself to him, knowing there was really something between us. She somehow heard what we did and didn't take it; she wanted revenge. Three weeks after, she intended to make us break up. She started spreading rumours about me sleeping with another guy and it eventually came to his ears. Of course, I'm sure he didn't believe it at first, but some guy, probably one of his friends, kissed me while I was waiting for him to come pick me up Friday night in the parking. Man, I don't know how she planned it, but right then his car pulled up in front of us for a brief moment and just started off again really fast. I believe he was furious at that time, but he didn't even ask me what was going on. He just fled and left me there!"

Sam couldn't believe it either. "I don't understand him; how could he believe what he saw without even asking you! Surely you're not the kind of girl to do that! If he thought that, then he didn't know you!"

"Well, hum, thanks Sam, but anyway, I tried to call him many times that night and I got no answer from the other end of the line. The morning after, I received a letter telling me I was no longer allowed to go to school. That bitch told the director that I proposed her to sell her drugs and so they dug through my locker and supposedly found evidence there..."

"You sold drugs in high school?", Sam asked eagerly.

"No... Of course not! She... planted it there somehow. Not only would I have to repeat a year but my parents were soon told what I 'did' and started screaming at me. No matter how many times I repeated them I never sold or even taken drugs, they wouldn't believe me and wanted to take me to a detox center! I... I felt like I didn't belong with my parents anymore. If... If they couldn't even trust me on that, then I thought I might as well be off of them and move out.

"She really did that!? That's awful! And you weren't allowed to go back to school as a student after that?"

"Yeah, they said things like 'it's not appropriate on school grounds' and 'you've shamed our establishment'. The director didn't believe anything I said to defend myself. My parents didn't want to help me with school after that. They...they grounded me, they lectured me, and then finally told me there was no way they'd pay the inscription to another school, since it was 'my fault'."

"So...that means you're working to-"

"Yes, I knew I needed money to pay for my last year of high school and for college too, so I found a job meanwhile. It was only supposed to be temporary, until I could find a better job, a job that pays more, but as you can see, I'm still here..."

"How long has it been?", Sam asked.

"A little more than 8 months now. I moved out soon after they 'found out' about it and I spotted a convenient apartment for me not too pricy, but I still didn't have enough to finish high school AND have money for the rent. I decided to take a year break to come out with the right amount; I still don't know if they're going to help me pay for college or not."

"But...that's wrong! You shouldn't have to put up with all these problems on your own, even if you did take drugs and got expelled because of it... What kind of parents could suddenly turn his child down like that? Aren't they supposed to love you no matter what?"

She didn't answer. His friend looked hurt, Sam noticed. 'How could she have put up with all that and said nothing?'

"Have you told anyone about this?"

"No, not really... You're the first person I've said that much."

"So why did you wait? You didn't trust me enough to think I'd care?" Sam sought for her eyes that were now fixed on the floor. "How did you manage to keep it all inside for so long?"

"I'm... I'm sorry. I didn't want you to take pity on me, and what difference would that have made, really? I'm practically an adult now, I'm on my own. I have to be able to take care of myself without help, that's what everyone does anyway..."

"What? No, it's ridiculous to think like that!" She was surprised as Sam raised his tone and confronted her opinion. She lifted her eyes upon the otter, who was looking directly at hers. "Look, everyone needs help from time to time, it's natural. You don't have to be ashamed of telling me something like that. You know I'm your friend, right?"

"Thanks Sam, you're a sweet guy."

"Don't thank me, it's only common sense that I'd care."

Sam looked back again at the table and quickly made a connection in his head.

"Is she...going to do that to Jason too", he thought aloud.

"Han? What's that?", he heard from behind.

"Ahh, no, nothing, I was talking to myself..."

Sam looked over at the table and perked his ears towards both of them.

"Hey, you heard of that party this Friday they're going to throw at the Academy?", she asked to Jason.

"No, not really; I don't really live there, you know?"

She laughed again, and Sam couldn't help but wonder how fake it was. "It's not because I live there, it's because there are posters everywhere in the halls. Don't you ever look up in front of you?"

"No", he admitted. "My eyes were half closed in all of my morning classes, so just imagine if I didn't have to pay attention outside of class..."

"Yeah, I can see that. You get pretty distracted sometimes, I noticed."

"I...guess I am."

'His eyes are pretty wide open as of now!' Sam noticed.

"So, you coming? I thought it could be fun if we go together!"

"I'm...gonna think about it", he responded with a light blush on his face.

"Well, I'll have to be going now. I just remembered I have to buy some books for my next class."

"But we haven't revised anything yet?" Jason looked confused.

'Revised?' Sam thought. He remembered what Marty had told him.

"You have a point there... How about tomorrow, at lunch again? This time I promise I won't run away. Is that okay with you?"

"Um..." Jason stood up with her, visibly about to step out. He seemed to hesitate, ears folded, like he was already lost somewhere. "Yeah, why not?" His ears perked up and his head followed, giving her a smile. A smile she didn't deserve...

'Damn, that bitch IS after Jason', he said to himself and cursed again. 'The studying, the party, the fake laughs: it's all to lure him in... But what will she do after?' He didn't quite know what she wanted, and that's why he had to figure it out. 'No, in fact, if something happens to him, I'll never forgive myself for not doing anything. I have to act, somehow, but how...' His thoughts ended here as she gave him a strange look while she was walking off.

Sam heard Jason stuffing his bag behind the glass and soon caught of a glimpse of his face as he turned around to leave. Again, he avoided the otter's eyes and walked away, with half a smile on his face.

"Wait", Sam heard from behind, "HE was with her? But... he couldn't have been talking about her, yesterday, could he? She..."

"Who's he", Sam asked, scouting around the store to find out.

"What? Nah, nothing, I was talking to myself." Sam frowned at her, but decided to let it go. He had a long day of work to go through still...

[...]

"Hey, Sam! You're early", Marty said, walking to his car parked in front of her apartment.

"Am I?", he said by the opened window of his car, almost instantly. He was blind shocked by what he saw. He actually smelled her before catching a glance at her. She has definitely put perfume on her; apricot maybe. She rounded the front of the car and made her way towards the passenger seat with her long dress. She wore her pink ribbon around her neck, and under it hung a silver pendant. She got on and looked into his eyes, Sam returning the glare. 'Mascara, gold and green earrings, and maybe some pink lipstick', he took note mentally.

There was an uncomfortable silence for a moment. She took a good look at me and smiled. Sam was about to compliment her but she started first.

"You decided to wear only jeans and plain T-shirt?"

"What? What's wrong with that?"

"Well, nothing I guess, it's not like...like we'd go to a chic restaurant, right?"

She didn't seem all that convinced after the pause she let stretching out. It wasn't like her to be so...hesitant. Sam always pictured her from the way he's been bonding with her at work that she likes to talk and never take back her words once she said it. She looked confident, and Sam really envied her for this part of her personality.

He decided to let it slip, since he reminded himself that he didn't know her that much; only from working alongside her.

"Duh, it makes me feels like you are overdressed, actually", the otter said with a smile. The comment didn't produce the desired effect, because he swore he saw his long bunny ears slide down a bit. "Eh, I mean, with the dark and all in the theatre room, who can notice?"

She giggled now, more at him than at herself. "You think I care what people I don't know think of me?" She asked it with an overly exaggerated question mark at the end. "You really don't know how girls works, right?" She winked at the otter, eyes fixed on her like a statue. "You see, it doesn't really matter how others perceive us, it's how we perceive ourselves. Whenever we go out, most of the girls have the needs to feel like they're pretty and at their best. It's as simple as that. Don't ask me why thought, but it just is. Feels...rewarding somehow."

She got a confused look in return, but expected no less. "So, you said you do this for yourself... Fine, I won't try to understand...", he said shaking his head. They both laughed, enjoying the nice breeze outside whose smell reminded them that fall was setting in. This odour always remembered Sam the camping trip he used to do with his parents when he was young. He turned his keys in the lock and soon got out in the streets and directed the car to the nearest highway entrance. The local theatre apparently didn't have 3D yet, so they had to go to 'the real one', as she called.

"So? We haven't decided yet... What are we gonna watch?" Sam asked.

"I said I was taking you to show you how much you've missed of 3D, so I kind of... had a movie in mind."

"Shoot", the otter said amused.

"Final Destination 5", she said with a smile.

"What? I didn't think you were into horror movies..."

"Well, it's not really a horror movie since you know people are going to die. The fun really is seeing how absurd their deaths are going to be... I consider it more as a comedy, but with gore on top of that."

"Wait... what do you mean, how absurd?"

"You haven't seen any of the previous ones?"

"No... To tell you the truth, I don't really like watching stressful movies."

The rabbit punched him in the arm, making him steer the wheel a little to the right. "Hey, I'm driving!", he said.

"Oh, don't be like that... You'll like it, I promise. Each movie shares a common rule: one person foresees a big disaster that kills a few dozen people just right before it happened, like in a dream. That person awakes soon after and some details of his vision come to reality. He or she panicked beforehand and successfully manages to escape with 6 other persons."

"So that's it?" 'If it's just that, I can handle.'

"No, silly, because it would be boring otherwise." She blinked at him, clearly enjoying the effect of suspense she was setting up. "You see, they weren't actually supposed to survive in the crash, so some entity (they call it death) tries to kill them one by one and make it look like an accident."

Sam tensed up a little in his seat, his hands pressing the wheel tightly. 'Death that tries to kill you', he thought. 'That's not reassuring...'

"So, you wanna see it?"

The otter felt a strong desire to keep seeing that evil smile of hers on her face.

"Um...yeah."

"Cool!"

They arrived at the parking and left the car. They entered the theatre and each paid their tickets. Once they entered the already dark room, Sam noticed most seats were occupied.

He actually had only seen one horror movie in his life, and it was the day he turned thirteen. He was old enough to be let in and his father decided to take him to the movie theatre for the occasion. He remembered he didn't even make it through the whole length and cover his face with his paws at the scary moments. They went to see "The Ring", which had quite some disturbing moments. Unfortunately, the creators clearly took pleasure at surprising the viewers because most of the time it was already too late as the images printed in his head like exposure to sudden lightness after waking up. Eventually, he got tired of hiding behind his paws all the time because he was scared of being taken by surprise, so he just walked off.

He didn't think he would be scared now, but he didn't see the point of watching furs being killed on screen.

"What are you waiting for?", she said looking back at him. He snapped out of it and followed her to where she was heading.

Marty

I spotted two seats that were isolated between the wall and the stairs. It felt kind of private and I liked it.

The movie had started and I couldn't help noticed that Sam looked tensed in his seat. It was so cute! But instead of putting a reassuring arm on his shoulder to help him ease up, I took a deadly pleasure of making him jump in surprise when he wasn't looking and the movie was in a particularly bloody scene. What do you know? Maybe he was right about me not being the most sensitive person in world, but come on, who doesn't enjoy these kind of things even a little. The face he made...it was priceless!

Anyway, I guess he doesn't hate me that much, because after a while we were soon passing comments to each other to debate on how the next person was going to die. Whether or not it was because he wasn't really scared anymore or it was because most furs were laughing in the movie theatre, he decided to play along. I couldn't really see him in the dark, but his eyes still shone in enlightenment. We had so much fun in there; I didn't even have time to make a move...yet. The movie of course ended too fast and soon, we were off into the light again.

"Damn, that scene at the clinic, it was insane!" He said.

"Yeah, I know! It must have hurt like hell, right."

"Yeah, so much for not bringing me to a 'real' horror movie."

"I acknowledge that this particular scene was frightening, but it was worth it, right?"

"I know what you mean: who could have guessed she'd die by stepping on a cuddy bear's eyes and miss her step so violently that it broke the window. She just fell out of the building and died."

"Yep. And then her eye popped out and rolled into the street!"

We laughed again while walking off outside the building. The night was a little cold, but refreshing. It helped me cool down and breathe normally. I still felt like it was five degrees higher inside my body since the movie ended. My tail couldn't keep still, betraying my nervosity.

"Hey Sam, want to grab a bite before we head back? There's a really great place where they sell the best pizza in the world! You'll love it, I'm sure-"

"Sorry, but I have to head back, really. I have school tomorrow and it's already..."

He checked his watch with astonishment. "Eleven? Damn I'll be tired tomorrow. And anyway, my father decided he was the best fan of pizza for the past two weeks. That's actually what I ate for supper, so..."

"Oh, I see..."

'I have to do it. I have to... If I don't now, I never will.'

Damn, we're walking around towards the parking. But why would he? Why would he say yes? I mean, we've known each other for over two months, but we barely know each other's life. Maybe he was right; I couldn't tell him my problems because I didn't trust him enough. I don't want him breaking my heart, I want him so bad. I want him even more because of what he'd said this afternoon. He was so...caring about it, saying it was wrong and all for my parents to turn me down. I felt like... I felt like I was closer to him than my own family! And he doesn't have to love me, but...

Sam

I crossed the pavement to get to my car, but I could only hear my footsteps behind me. I turned around to see Marty motionless with her head down.

"Come on," I said, "you shouldn't have chosen your three feet tall high heels if you can't even manage to cross the street with 'em."

I stopped too, hearing no reply to the provocation I threw at her. She'd always tell me something back to shut me up, but now she didn't. Was she...sad? No, she looked more...thoughtful. I walked over to her and I saw her head move up, with her ears still faded down.

"What's wrong, Marty?"

"Sam, I, eh..."

It wasn't like her to jump from happy to serious, so it got me concerned. She breathed out loudly, feeling that soft warmth on my cheek. She was closing in to my body as I just stared at her in confusion.

I was really surprised when warmth surrounded me as her arms pressed on my back, lowering my head over her blue eyes. I sensed my lips brushing against hers and I felt her tongue trying to push itself inside. I was so shocked by her sudden show of affection that my maw opened in surprised and now, our tongues met fully inside my muzzle.

It was really weird... I mean, it wasn't unpleasant, but... Surely, that wasn't the feeling they described in those movies. I didn't feel like...pure love, passion, or something. I was still thinking of Jason even though her very female lips pressed against mine and her breasts up against my chest. I guess that confirms it then. Damn it, damn it all! I didn't want to be like this; why should I be the one who's different?! Like my life wasn't bad enough as it is now! If I don't like girls, what are my parents going to say?

We were still kissing and about fifteen seconds passed. My mind couldn't stop running in the background. She had still no clue of what I was thinking. I... I have to...do something. I can't let her go on, but... What am I going to say?

I gently pushed her off and she looked confused for a second. I guess she was trying to figure out if I was out of breath or if there was another reason. I looked her up in the eyes with a sad smile, but I was still wordless.

"I'm...sorry", she said after a while, turning her head back. "I always wanted to tell you how I felt, but each time I tried, the words just wouldn't come out. When I finally had the courage to invite you, I had so much fun... I knew I couldn't just let you go and pretend I felt nothing for you this time..."

There was a long pause at the end of her sentence. How could have I not seen it before?

My ears twitched in the cool air that surrounded us that I now felt since Marty let me go. "Marty, I... I had no idea that you felt this way for me... How long has it been?"

"A long time I guess. The first day I saw you, I was stunned by how beautiful of an otter you looked." I grinned at her compliment. That was the first time someone said something like that to me. Ever. "So, of course, that explained why I was bugging you so much to try to know you better-"

"But I was kidding! You know I don't really find you annoying; you're just the type of person who's enthusiast and confident. I... I envy that, in fact."

'I wish I could be the same', whispering to myself.

She smiled, even though she's still waiting for me to give her some kind of sign that her love was mutual. "Sam, I like spending time with you. I like talking to you. You're the first person that made my life better since I ran away from home. You said you envied that I was enthusiast and confident, but it's all because of you..."

'What is she talking about?'

"Before I met you, I was really depressed that I was now alone to manage my life. To my eyes, it was day after day of work; it became a rotating cycle. I wasn't the person I used to be anymore. I was too reclusive to make any effort to relate to others and to be friendly. I thought in some point of my life that I was doing it all in vain. But then you came in... You made me laugh, you made me smile, and you always found a way to get my mind off things. I actually looked forward to go to work and seeing you! That's when I realized that I was slowly falling in love with you."

'I can understand that', I thought. 'I wouldn't know what to do if I was abandoned like this by my parents... Still, she could have said something sooner!'

"I'm...really flattened that you consider me that important... I... I don't know what to say..."

"Then say yes Sam... Tell me that you care about me, that...you want to be with me. Say something, at least!" Her voice was really shaky and I could see her arms trembling, lying in a crossed position on her belly.

"But I DO care about you! And sure, I like to be with you, but...not like that. I... I see you as a friend, a GOOD friend! I..."

** Marty**

'A good friend... Of course! Everyone sees me as a good friend. If I'd stop acting like a brute all the time, then maybe he would've seen me otherwise.'

I couldn't hold them anymore, the tears were running down my cheeks and I turned my back on him so he wouldn't see. It wasn't his fault, so there was no reason for him to see me in pain like that. It wouldn't be fair to him...

I began walking off in the other direction, hoping he'd leave me alone. Unfortunately, his voice saying "hey, where are you going" behind my back made my ears twitch in annoyance. I didn't respond. I couldn't. I only wanted to be left out and wonder what part of my personality he didn't like enough to love me, playing the role of a masochist. We all does it even though it doesn't help at all, it just makes us sad even more. But I wasn't able to contain my emotions nor to talk rationally and fair to the one guy that made my life so much brighter these past few months.

"Come back! You can't leave like this."

"Just...leave me alone, Sam..." I said with my monotone and cold voice.

"No I won't! You're twenty miles away from your house, what will you do?"

"I'll...take a taxi."

"That's absurd! Let me drive you back!"

I was walking away from him, but he was following me still. He was beginning to get on my nerves, so I stopped to face him.

"Sam, I... I understand, okay? Is that what you want to hear?"

"No it's not. I'm telling you, you DON'T understand!"

"I understand that it's pretty clear you don't find me attractive!"

And there I was, shouting at him. Does he want me to be mad? Why can't he let me go? I breathed normally again, trying to remain calm.

"If you don't want to be with me, I understand, really. You don't have to feel bad about it..."

"No! I really like being with you, it's not that... I would probably have fallen in love with you, if..."

"If what Sam? If I'd be more gentle and caring with you?"

"No! Damn it, it's just...I...don't...swing that way, okay?"

"What?" I couldn't restrain myself from expressing my confusion. Did he really say what I heard? I turned around to face his eyes, but they were shut and dripping wet. The wind was picking up and there were suddenly no more sounds in the surroundings, except for the footsteps of two passersby who were looking at us awkwardly. I saw him clench his digits into fists, finally breaking into sobs.

"I...I'm gay, Marty. I'm sorry, I can't help it... I'll... I'll understand if you don't want to see me again", he said trying to wipe off his tears with his paw.

'I wasn't the only one. He's been repressing things inside like I did, too scared to even consider letting these thoughts out to someone. I understand now... So it wasn't just my imagination, he had a lot on his mind these days. Did I really think for a second that he was just tired all the time? No, somehow I knew something was wrong with him, but I didn't want to believe it... I didn't want to think that a guy as funny and optimistic as he was could have his share of fears and sadness.'

I couldn't walk away on him now. Not when he needed me, even though I wouldn't have a chance with him. I was hurt, but he needed me. He needed me to be comprehensive and comforting.

"Are you out of your mind!? Why would I want to do that?"

Sam

I opened my eyes in incredulity. 'Does that mean she doesn't mind?' I didn't care one bit what would happen to me when I saw her ran away from me, I just needed her to understand and not to do anything rash. I didn't want to hurt her. She was always the one to cheer me up, so it was inconceivable for me to think that her smile would fade, that I would never be able to see it again. I just...had to do something!

I stayed silent for a while, waiting for what she was about to say. That's when I heard very familiar words that made me realize how foolish I was...

"So why did you wait? You didn't trust me enough to think I'd care?"

I felt like a lot of pressure was lifted off of me. I hugged her tightly with my arms, too happy to express it otherwise and too precious of a friend she was to let her go. My head was buried in her shoulder, her warm fur brushing my cheek with the softness of a cloud. I felt her tensed up, visibly uncomfortable by the posture I adopted, but she hugged me back after a while, pressing her paws on my back, returning the strong grip I was giving her.

We stayed embraced into each other's arms for a while until we heard "just get a room, you two!" from an obviously jealous tiger. That's when I realized we were still outside the theatre near the front door, surrounded by people. I let her go and noticed that her ears were red like tomatoes. 'Maybe I went too far...'

"Um...thanks Marty. Thanks for being so comprehensive and for comforting me. It really means a lot to me..."

"Well, that's what friends are for... TO BE COMPREHENSIVE, I mean. Not to...hug each other..."

She made me smile once again. 'Looks like I did', I thought with amusement. That's when I realized how much of a good friend she was. She had no trouble accepting the fact that I liked guys even though she had a crush on me. Or...because she had a crush on me. 'Ah, it's so confusing!' What really mattered is that she decided we would stay friends.

"I know it's not what you wanted to hear, but..."

"It's okay. I understand now... Does anyone know about you? I mean, except me."

"No. Right now, I can't talk to anyone... Feels...too risky."

"You can talk to me, just so you know. When I'll...feel better myself."

I was about to apologize again, but she cut me off.

"And don't you dare repeat that you're sorry. It's not your fault!"

I frowned at her and she returned me a smile of satisfaction.

"I know what you're thinking just by looking at your face. Even though I didn't know that part of you, you're still the same clumsy guy I knew not so long ago."

I nudged her instead of responding, breaking the confidence she had before. She tensed up again in a cute way, but didn't stop me. I saw her close her eyes slowly.

"Marty? What do you say we go home now?"

She agreed and we went to my car, both of us stayed silent. There would have been a million things more to talk about tonight but we were both too tired to discuss it. The fact that she was okay with it was all I needed to know for now. But something else slipped into my mind while I was driving her home. 'What if... No, she wouldn't accept that, would she? Then I'll have to convince her as well...'

"Good night, Marty?" I said while putting my car on park.

"Yeah, good night, Sam", she said while opening the passenger door. She hesitated before walking off, but she added "my friend" while punching me in the shoulder. It sounded a little forced out giving the circumstances and a little clumsy of her, but it didn't fail to make me smile. 'There's the Marty I know...'

[...]

I got home around midnight but there was still light inside. I found my dad finishing a beer in the kitchen.

"Dad? Why are you still up?"

"Oh, I was with a client. He just left, actually."

"I see... So you're drinking on the job?" I inquired with a smile.

"Couldn't let him drink alone", he responded, followed by a laugh. "So how did your date went? Did you kiss her?"

"It wasn't a date, dad..."

"Wait, it was with a girl, right..." I nodded to him, who had let the question fall. "When I was young, going out with a beautiful girl was called a date-"

"Dad! It wasn't like that, okay!"

"Jeez. Okay, fine, whatever you say. If you don't want to talk about it..."

"I do want to talk to you about something, but... It's complicated... Could it wait until tomorrow, if you're free?"

"Sure, son. Now go to sleep and don't make any noise. If your mother knows you're still up, she'll kill you for sure."

"Thanks dad", I said with a smile, tapping his shoulder while passing by. I went up in my room and literally dropped my body on the bed, face in the pillow. I still didn't know what I'd say to Jason about Stephanie, but I was too far gone in the warmth of my bed to care right now.