Coalescence Book I - Chapter 7 - Complications
Chapter 7 - Complications
-W-
My human had hardly moved, even as my body couldn't seem to stop wiggling or rubbing against him. Even as my tail refused to calm itself as I channeled all my building emotions out through it so I wouldn't burst. He felt a different wash of emotions than I did it seemed.. Wetness welled in his eyes suddenly and began to overflow. Even through the faint, nearly severed connection I could feel it. That haunting sadness had returned. My joy would have to wait, I had a duty. I came out with a purpose, to protect my human from his own sadness, from his sullen solitude.
My arms embraced him before I had consciously commanded them to, wrapping him up and smothering him into my fur, shielding him from unknown enemies. Non-existent enemies. There was nothing to fight, my instincts wanted something to fight off, to rip and tear an enemy.. but his enemy was circumstance. It was loss. There was nothing physical I could fend off. I could hold him however. He had held me for so long without knowing, it was my turn to return the kindness.
He remained quiet for a long time, letting me hold him as he cried. I wondered what he was thinking, he seemed lost, but I would guide him. Very carefully I moved and shifted, keeping one leg within his.. I did not want to risk leaving him completely, but I did want to turn to face him more. He wiped the wetness from his face and stared at me, his voice slipping out barely heard by even my own sensitive ears.
"Thank you.."
I wanted to return the words, but I had not yet mastered words. Instead I put my paw to his chest. He seemed to understand the gesture, or at least the intent.
"Do you have a name?.."
A name? The concept was new, words were new.. but I understood them through him. He had a name, I knew that, but somehow I did not know what it was. The way knowledge and information was shared through him to me seemed so vague in the finer details. All I could do was shake my head. Even simple gestures like that I seemed to know, because he knew. Yet still I did not know his name. I did not know where we were, but I understood it was his home.
"My name is Connor.."
More silence followed, he seemed at a loss of what to say and speaking was going to be hard for me. I didn't try to repeat his name, but I was elated to know it. My tail began to move again. His hand tentatively moved to take mine, lifting it up in-between our faces to examine me. His dexterous fingers spread my thicker ones, a thumb rubbing and feeling over my faint pads, up and down the warm underbelly of my palm, before tracing a line up to my claws. I didn't move, I didn't want to hurt him, I remembered what those claws could do, what they had done to his bedding.
Suddenly there was a loud sound, banging. My fur stood on end in an instant, especially on the back of my neck. My body jerked towards the noise, and I heard my human cry out in pain. Rage flared through me, I had never felt this intensity of emotion before. Not from him, not from myself. Who had hurt him? Who was making that rapping noise? Where were they? A deep, guttural noise boomed in my chest and escaped my throat, growls that seemed to fill the room, to warm whoever hurt my human to back off.
"Fuck... ah.. shit, shit.. calm down.. calm down.."
I looked back at my human.. he was clenching his hand tight, crimson liquid was dripping through his fingers and down his wrist. The very same red was smeared on my claws.
Wait.
No. I had hurt him. It wasn't someone else, it had been me. My rage boiled alongside a different emotion, regret, sorrow. My heart sank as I stared at his blood. The smell of it ignited something else in me, in my core, in my belly. I felt a deeper growl emanate from there as a twisted pang worked itself through my gut. My human seemed to be panicking, staring at the door like there truly was danger there.. but it was me, I was the danger, I had hurt him. I tried licking at his hand, my ears flattened back firmly against my skull.. but he pushed my now bloody snout away.
"Shit, please.. No, you gotta go.. you gotta hide or go back in or leave or.."
His voice was quick and breathless. He wanted me gone? Another knocking sound towards the front of his home. Another deep growl from me in response as my body jerked.
He repeated his words, telling me I needed to go back. That I couldn't be here. Connor tried to get up, he kept looking towards the knocking noise. Shame was welling in me, but I began to obey, I began to slip back inside of him, letting my legs reconnect and disappear inside of his own. Letting our chests become one again. Our arms. The last he heard of me was a pitiful whine as my muzzle melded back into his face. Just like that, I was gone from his world. Back in the comfort of my own, in his emotional embrace. I was distraught, I could feel he was in pain from my claws. I could feel his panic. What did I do...