Legend of the OmeletWings - Chapter 13: Waiting
#13 of Legend of the OmeletWings
Screaming rang through Embryo's ears, the screams of everyone in her village who had ever laid an egg echoing into the present. Screams of pure torture and angst, screams of dragons who could not bear another moment of their own existence. No matter how proud they had been when it was over, no matter how many they laid, not one had ever managed to keep it together while it was happening. When faced with Egg Laying, even the strongest of dragons were unable to avoid succumbing to fits of horrific screaming. And Embryo was next, not only far from the strongest, but also the most sensitive of her kind.
"Em? Embryo, are you okay?" Summit was calling to her. After Summit had broke the news, Embryo appeared to have dropped off into a fog of horrific memories, and Summit couldn't help but feel worried. He had known Embryo had had some reserves to egg laying, but faced with it now, he saw that those reserves went much deeper than he'd originally suspected.
Embryo tried to turn her attention to Summit, but she was still wrapped up in her memories. Her eyes still staring blankly, her chest began to heave with heavy breaths. After the initial shock, panic was beginning to set in.
"How can this be happening?" she gasped, "I didn't do anything to have an egg, did I?" She looked at Summit. "This isn't your egg, isn't it?"
Summit took a step back, "Of course not. You know we've only been..."
"I know," Embryo panted, "Just how then...?"
Embryo kept panting.
"Okay, calm down," Summit soothed, "It's going to be okay. You're not the first dragon to ever bear an egg without a father. It's completely normal."
"Okay!?" Embryo burst, "Have you ever heard a dragon laying an egg before? The way she screams? The way she basically begs for mercy rather than just being able to see it through?"
Summit stopped. Was it really that bad? He knew it wasn't the easiest task, but... Was it really that bad? "No," he admitted, "I haven't." He looked away, feeling a deep shame opening up in him. He'd always thought of egg laying as normal. As a male, he'd never considered it anything he needed to concern himself with but he'd always just figured, it just happened. Had he really just been unwittingly closing himself off from a secret world of suffering that half of all dragons inevitably faced, and just passed it off as normal?
Embryo closed her eyes, trying to make herself calm down. Finally, she opened them and looked at Summit. "Sorry, I just wasn't ready for this. I just wanted to leave my village and see if there was more to life than just Egg Laying, and now..." Her voice cracked. "I'm sorry, I'm not even having mood swings right now and I'm still acting like this."
Embryo paused. It now made sense now, why Embryo had been acting funny these past few days. Her natural instincts had been trying to get her partnered up in preparation for the coming egg so it wouldn't be left infertile. Summit had been there all along to father the egg, but their relationship wasn't yet to the point where they were ready to partner for life. And now it was too late, the egg was already beginning to take shape. The only purpose it'd be good for? A simple Omelet, highlight of a true OmeletWing.
She looked at Summit, suddenly realizing how awkward this once again was. She'd been pretty open with him at how awkward it was that girl bodies just so happened to be such great natural food producers, but it was quite different acknowledging such an embarrassing fact about one's own gender as opposed to the fact that she, sitting here with egg right now, was now specifically one of those food producing bodies herself. She crossed her legs, trying to avoid imagine how the egg would come into the world. Her face went red. Surely Summit must have some idea about that aspect as well. How could this be her body? The only body she had, now set for unimaginable pain, already set for humiliation.
Embryo thought back to the other dragons of her village and started calculating on her talons. "It takes about one week for the egg to form," Embryo said to herself, "I've been tired for about five days. That means..." Embryo's breath caught in her throat, "I have till the day after tomorrow."
The day after tomorrow until she was no more, until she was ruthlessly murdered by the agony that was egg laying, the Embryo who came out of it being a completely new dragon, one who'd actually know what it was to bear such pain, the old Embryo, the one she was now, gone forever.
Summit looked at her pale face, she wasn't taking this well, "Em, are you okay?"
Embryo shook her head again. "Of course I am," she tried to convince herself, "This is normal stuff for a girl. It's the way girls are, right? To lay eggs whether they want to or not, to suffer all that pain, and be glad over the Omelet left behind. And here I thought I could get away from all that. Of course I couldn't because that's the way girls are, right? Just egg loving Egg Layers. Girl. Imagine being one. What a joke, right?" Embryo wiped a talon across her head, feeling herself getting worked up.
The thought suddenly came to Summit, he'd always just taken things as they were, he'd never thought of wondering if they could be different. "Do you not want to be a girl." He asked.
Embryo sighed, letting her emotions calm. "I don't mind being a girl, I just don't know if I want to be an Egg Layer." She turned back toward her resting spot. "But it appears the two are inseparable."
Summit looked at her. "I don't know. You said you had two days right. Maybe you should just rest right now and we'll figure this out tomorrow." Summit shifted his talons. He was helping her right, right? He'd never dealt with girls dealing with these things. Oh, he was blushing now. What if he did something wrong? Why did girls do weird things like lay eggs? Not like there was anything wrong with that, just why did reality have to be so weird? Why did everything weird about girls have to amplify his crush by a million? Why did girls have to be so cute and weird at the same time? Especially Embryo. (It'd probably be nice for her to be able to take a breath for once without the risk of sending his crush levels through the roof. In other words, guys and girls really needed to stop having differences that made the other blush.)
Embryo sighed, trying not to think what inner monologue Summit must be having right now to be blushing like that. Of course, rest, that's what she needed. It was all she was good for anyway right now. Embryo's heart dropped. She'd quite enjoyed seeing the world with Summit, Summit had been so looking forward to visiting the Bay of a Thousand Scales. Now, by the next time she'd be able to travel as she'd once had, she'd first have to endure unspeakable agony for with she couldn't even imagine.
She shook her head, moving back over to her spot to lay down, trying to take deep calming breaths, just focusing on the rhythm of her chest, the air coming in and out of her lungs, tinged with the scent of sea salt and stale sand carried from the Ocean, finding its way slowly into the cave. That was soothing. Summit was right, no use worrying over something that was going to happen anyway. This happened all the time, it was natural, right? None of the other OmeletWings ever had this much anxiety over it, surely she was overreacting. But even still, as she drifted off to sleep, the anxiety inside her continued to gnaw at the pit of her stomach.
Embryo awoke with a gasp to a deep pang inside her. Her talons went to her stomach to feel around and see what the problem was, but it was gone now, only a distant memory, faded like the dreams it had ended.
Embryo looked around the dark cave trying to remember where she was. And then it came back to her. She was with egg. She was with egg... because she was a girl. Embryo's head spun. She was a girl. She was a girl and all her girliness was about to be put on display because she was an Egg Layer.
She looked over to where Summit was sleeping peacefully, his stomach rising and falling in the gentle rhythm of sleep. She blushed as she realized how much of her girliness Summit already knew about her, how much he would know by the time this was over, things he'd never go through himself, but would still see her go through. It felt weird knowing that their differences made her vulnerable in way that he wasn't and still she was essentially sharing those vulnerabilities with him. It felt awkward to see herself that way, but at this point, it didn't matter, she just needed to get through it and be done.
She stood up and walked to the cave entrance. Sitting down, she just stayed there awhile, breathing in the Ocean air, listening to the sound of the waves washing upon the starlit beach, just being. This was the Universe, just things happening. Things shift and move all the time, it was natural, she just wondered what that shifting and moving must feel like when happening to an experiencing being like herself. Like the water separating as it hit the beach, so her body would do whatever was natural when it came time to lay the egg. The only difference was that while the ocean just happened as it happened, her body would actually feel those changes within her, and she feared it would not be as calming of an experience as waves hitting the beach. An avalanche wouldn't stop to ask what it was impacting as it ripped and tore through everything in its path. It couldn't, it was gravity, the laws of nature, why should her egg be any different when it happened to her.
It was weird to think about. Egg Laying to her was always an unfathomable third-person experience. As much as her life had tried to tell her this was inevitable, she just could never comprehend that she could actually face this unfathomable experience first hand as everyone else in her village was convinced she would. Right now she felt akin to Summit who would never face such things. But soon it would no longer be like that, as Embryo _would_have experienced the unfathomable, and Summit would remain at the place Embryo was now, never able to comprehend the unfathomable as reality.
She took a deep breath. It was a nice night. Too bad she couldn't leave her story here. But she knew that right now, all this niceness was just a pause, a break in her journey leading up to that which was unbearable. Right now she was feeling okay, she could tolerate her own existence, later when the laying was done, she would once again be okay with herself as all the pain faded into the past, only a distant memory. But between these two points, there would be a time of certain excruciating agony for which she knew she wouldn't be able to bear. If only she could skip beyond that time to the point where it was over, then she knew she'd be okay. But looking down at her talons, she could do nothing but accept that her existence was firmly rooted in the present, that though there would be a time when the egg laying incident was no more, she would actually have to go through it first before that could be the case.
Suddenly, a yawn rose within her. She realized it was probably getting time for her to get back to sleep. Turning to go back into the cave, she took one last look back at the ocean knowing that she didn't have many more times to enjoy it as herself before she was changed by the unspeakable pain of Egg Laying.
The next day, Embryo's anxiety only got worse, she knew she was going to lay this egg now, there was no way out of it, but she could only imagine what it'd actually be like. She had some idea what her reaction would be considering that of all those in her village, which wasn't too pretty, but she could only imagine what the pain must feel like to raise that same kind of reaction in her, to know that it was normal, to know that it'd all be alright in the end, yet still succumb to that same kind of screaming in the end anyway.
She tried to calm herself by telling herself it was alright, that it's all be over eventually, that other dragons had experienced the same and still made it out fine, maybe even other dragons just as sensitive as her. But she couldn't help but realize that no matter how fine they were in the end, how excited they were to create their own Omelets, there was always a lot of screaming between Point A and Point B.
Embryo once again found herself wishing she could just skip to the end of this whole thing.
As Summit was out catching fish for them to share, Embryo sat down and started feeling along her stomach. She began moving her talons down, trying to imagine the path the egg would take through her. Would there be enough room? Embryo flinched at her own touch, her body felt so sore, there was just too much muscle and body mass already there, how would there be enough room for the egg to pass through her without bursting and tearing through all that. Embryo winced. And if this felt so sore her just feeling from the outside, she couldn't imagine how it'd feel when it all happened on the inside.
Summit entered the cave bringing with him a decent load of fish. He saw Embryo feeling herself, and stepped back awkwardly. Embryo realized how embarrassing this may have looked, but considering that she had essentially become afflicted with this condition on no other account than by her simply being a girl, she didn't know if there was much more that could make her any more self-conscious in her own body than she already was.
"Sorry," she apologized to Summit, knowing he probably hadn't reached the same point as she had of already-too-embarrassed-with-myself-to-care-about-the-small-details-anymore, "I.. just don't know if the egg can fit through me. I'm trying to imagine it..." Embryo cringed, "but I just don't feel there is enough space in my body for it to fit through."
Summit sat next to her not sure what to say. "It's been done by many dragons before. I don't think it matters if it seems possible, it will find a way to work out either way."
"That's what worries me," Embryo said, looking at him, eyes large with worry, "If it doesn't fit naturally, then think of all the muscles and everything it'll have to reshape and tear through in order to force itself out of me. All that stuff I have to actually feel!" Embryo was beginning to panic. "The egg can mutilate my insides however it needs to to get out, and all I can do is feel it's impact!"
Summit was speechless, gaping at the horrific thought. Embryo was panting, trying to catch her breath. Slowly it evened, beginning to calm down. She looked at Summit. "Sorry, I just sort of panicked there for a moment."
Summit looked at Embryo, "Are you sure you're ready for this?"
"Well, it's not like I exactly have a choice," Embryo sighed, "Besides, it's just pain. What more is pain than not being able to stand existing in your own body, but existing in it anyway?"
Summit hesitated. "Em, I'm not sure I like this," he told her.
"Well you're lucky that you're not sure. I am sure I don't like this and I have to go through it anyway."
They fell into silence.
As they sat down to eat, Embryo continued to think about the whole situation, the egg, how small her whole body felt compared to it. There was no way it was going to fit through her easily.
And then she felt herself cracking up. Summit looked at her surprised.
"Em? What's so funny" Summit asked.
"It's just... Just, imagine... being a girl," she started, amused, "and knowing that you're about to endure a pain beyond the limits of what any dragon can take, and you're extremely hypersensitive and you know every ounce of pain you feel will be realized to its fullest extent. And... and every part of you wants to do whatever it can to avoid it, but the next day, there you are writhing and screaming in pain and humiliation in that same sort of pain that no dragon should have to take anyway. And it's all because you're a girl, a weird girl, because that's just how your weird body functions!"
Embryo was bursting out laughing hysterically by this point.
But then that the laughing began to turn into tears. Embryo breaths started coming in heavy gasps, as she began to cry, all sense of humor fading from her being. "I don't want to be in a pain that no dragon can be able to bear," she cried.
Summit's heart broke for her. Moving next to her, he let her lean into him and cry. He patted her back with his talons. "It's okay Embryo, calm down, it's all going to be okay," he soothed.
In an instant, she pulled out of his grasp, her eyes flaring. "Okay?" Embryo burst out suddenly "Of course it's okay! Do you know what it's like to wake up every morning to the screams of another dragon in unimaginable agony, and knowing that your only purpose in life is to eventually suffer the same, just so everybody around you can enjoy Breakfast? Of course you wouldn't! Because you're not a girl, your life is easy. Here I am to take on something no one should have to face, and I'm expected to just deal with it because I'm a girl! Well I won't, I won't be calm, I won't just take it and pretend everything's alright! Why don't you carry an egg you never asked for, have to sit here waiting to suffer beyond all imagining, and then you tell me it's all okay! But of course you won't, because you're a boy, you get to live comfortably in your non-Egg Laying body." Embryo began to break down, "You will never have to lay eggs! That is my suffering and my suffering alone! So don't you think you could ever understand me."
Summit bowed his head, shocked by the outburst, regret filling him. "You're right, I don't understand, I'll never understand. But I want to. I want to be here for you."
"You want to understand, but you'd never want to actually experience it."
At these words, Summit knew there was nothing more to say. He just bowed his head. "I'm sorry."
Embryo looked at him, her emotions calming. "You're right, I can't blame you for not understanding, it's not your fault you'll never have to go through something like this. It's just, I didn't want to go through it either, I left my village to see if I could be more, and here I am again, right back to what I was trying to avoid. All because I'm just a stupid Egg Laying girl." Tears began to fill her eyes.
Summit cautiously moved back to sit down at her side again. "Em. Being a girl doesn't make you 'just a stupid Egg Layer'. You are so much more than that."
Embryo took a deep breath to calm herself, tears rolling freely from her eyes, her voice cracking. "I know. I just wish I could be a girl without having to be embarrassed or afraid of what it means to be me."
Summit looked at her. Gently, he leaned his head over into her, twining his tail with hers. She leaned into him as well, trembling with emotion, letting the tears flow.
The rest of the day, Embryo had very little left to say, just anxiety and regret over her predicament.
As they were getting ready to go to sleep for the night, Embryo looked at her stomach, then at Summit. "At least I'm sort of attractive with egg and all, right? What do you think? How do you feel seeing me with egg?"
Summit looked away. "I don't know Em. I mean, you're pretty Em, I'll always think you're pretty, and I do like slightly plump," he winced at his words, blushing. Okay, time to move on, "but mostly, I just want you to be okay. And by the sound of how you're handling this, I don't know if you are."
"But at least I'm pretty, right?"
"I guess."
Embryo sighed. "Well, at least I still got something going for me."
Embryo didn't really know if that made her feel any better, but maybe she should just accept it, that maybe her sole purpose in life was just to lay eggs and be pretty. And since she knew that she wasn't thrilled about laying eggs, perhaps she should just focus on her beauty. It felt kind of awkward that her main purpose in life was to have her presence give guys a mega crush on her, but at least it was better than nothing, right? At least Summit had tried to be modest and respectful with her when it came to his crush. Besides, she kind of had a crush on herself, so it was alright, right? Somehow, none of that satisfied her, but she tried to put the thoughts out of her head.
As she curled up to go to sleep, Summit looked over at her, concerned for her emotional wellbeing.
Embryo awoke in a panic, gasping for breath, scrambling to find her surroundings. It was the middle of the night and all was calm. Embryo reached to feel her stomach. Nothing. The egg still wasn't ready to come.
Embryo began pacing the cave, trying to catch her breath. Stopping, she seethed her claws through the cave floor trying to get her head in the right place, feeling the dust and sand shifting in her talons. "I'm a girl, I'm an OmeletWing, I love Egg Laying, I love eggs." She paused, realizing, "I do like eggs." Pause. "See, this is for something good, something you love. You just need to make a small sacrifice, all Egg Layers make this sacrifice, it's normal, you're normal..." She felt her stomach, it was starting to feel overly bloated. "So why am I so anxious about it?"
Summit awoke to the sound of her franticing. He watched her as she exited the cave.
Slowly, he got up and followed her. Finding her sitting out on the edge of the beach, he sat down to join her.
"Having a hard time sleeping, huh?" He asked.
Embryo sighed. "Yes. I don't want to go through this, but I know I have to." She breathed in a deep, shuttering breath, "But I have to," she said again.
There was silence for a moment. Summit didn't really want to go into the subject, but he knew he had to address it.
"Em, when this all starts..." Summit hesitated, "I could stay with you... Or I... maybe I should go?"
Embryo looked off into space, as if in a daze, "You could go. Come back when it's all over. All the pain and suffering I go through, for you it'll be like it never happened. That'd be nice."
"That's not what I meant," Summit rushed to get back to the point, "I meant, you know, I'm a guy, and this is..." he hesitated, going red, "very, uh, not guy-ey stuff right now. And you're a girl, and you might not feel comfortable... being made so vulnerable in front of... and it's just very... personal and not... I'm just not sure if it's proper for me to, uh, see you like that, with uh, how it's all done and all." Summit flinched at the implications of his words.
Embryo looked at him. "At this point, I don't really think there is much more discomfort with my own existence I can have than I already feel now. You can go if you don't feel comfortable seeing me... doing what Egg Layers do... But if you could..." her voice cracked, "I don't want to be alone. I want to be with you."
Summit looked at her and nodded, fighting back the embarrassment of the implications of he had just agreed to, trying to focus only on the necessity of the situation. "I'll be here for you."
Summit let her lean against him, twining his tail once again with hers. In such a short time, he had grown much closer to her than he had ever dared to hope. Now he was about to be brought closer still, to stand at her side as she experienced something more personal than he even felt ready for, closer to a girl than he imagined himself being, dealing with scenarios only a girl could deal with. It was awkward, almost unnatural. But at this point, he knew wasn't doing this for himself. Embryo needed him, and he'd be there for her, even if all his instincts were telling him their relationship wasn't far enough along for this. He'd do it because Embryo needed him.
Sunlight was shining into the cave, Summit was standing next to her, gently nudging her. "Em, it's morning."
Em stirred, moaning slightly as she opened her eyes. Her talons slowly went over her stomach, and then the realization hit her.
Today was the day. She knew that the two days was just an estimation on her part, but somehow she just knew, she could feel it, somewhere deep inside her. The next time they went to bed, Embryo of the OmeletWings would have laid an egg.