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Not as it Seems

Morning had passed, and the rest of the pokémon, and their trainers, had awoken not far behind Kurath. I had been accepted by those around me even if they were coerced into believing that I meant them no harm. In reality that was the truth. But after what happened yesterday I wasn't surprised that they thought otherwise. As much as I hated to admit it, I owed it to both Rathe and Kein. Who both helped me convince Zica and Kurath that I wasn't planning against them. The only one who hadn't come around was Syne.

I lay in the depressed circle of cushions looking over towards the wall left of the windows, where Syne had placed himself for what looked like the rest of the day. I cuts I gave him were already becoming hard to see, as if he'd spent quite some time trying to part his fur so they weren't so visible. I regretted what I did, but I still stand by my reasons. I have just as much a right to my thoughts as any other pokémon in this house. The only thing he did was speak on my behalf. It wasn't so much the action that annoyed me, but it was what I thought he said that pushed me over the edge.

"You can't spend all day staring at him Luyo." I glanced towards my right, finding Rathe knelt down beside me. "Syne will come around eventually. I guess he just needs some time." It was times like these I wish I was still in the wild. I just wanted a moment to think by myself. Even though I had practically sorted out how I was going to fix this problem, but it didn't help knowing that I had no way to solve this problem without any help. "You can't force these things onto others Luyo. You said you've spent a large majority of your life in the wild, just waiting on nothing."

"For your information I wasn't waiting for anything." I looked back towards Syne. "There was nothing out there for me. Nothing I had to work for or live with. Back when I was care-free. Didn't care for anything in the world but myself." I paused dropped my head into the cross of my forelegs. "But then I was found and turned into something I had always despised. I started to care for others. And it's brought me nothing."

"That's where you're wrong Luyo. It may look like nothing now, but this is only your second day here. It can't tak-"

I started to tune out to Rathe's rambling. I didn't care for her lectures on believing that everything would turn out fine. I didn't believe everything would just happen if I wanted it to. Things only happened if I made it so. And the only thing worse than a result you never want to see is being helpless to stop it from happening in the first place. Being helpless is as useful as being dead. In the end, it doesn't matter. But I was in the exact position I never wanted to be in. I was stuck between wanting to make good with whom I would be living closest with, and waiting for him to approach me so I didn't make things worse. If only I could read his mind. If only I could find out what he wanted me to do to try and make things better. I could ask one of the others to talk to him about it, but Syne is smart enough to know that I sent them.

I sighed heavily and returned to reality. "-ou understand that Luyo?" I hadn't realised that Rathe had been talking that whole time.

"I know." Was all I replied with. I figured that it would cover anything that Rathe would've said over the time that I wasn't listening.

"Well, no, you don't. If you did know then you wouldn't be watching him now. And if I recall, yesterday you said that you didn't care for him at all."

I stood up and faced Rathe, looking down on her, if not only slightly. "I don't care for him. I just want to end the hostilities between us before it gets out of hand!" Unfortunately for me I said that line a little louder than I wanted to. I noticed Syne's ear twitch. I glanced my eyes to his location for a moment, then turned around and walked away. Rathe following along beside me.

"And that is why you think you're so conflicted. If you didn't care for Syne, then it wouldn't of mattered if he heard you say that, but since you made an effort to see if he did, it proves that you do care."

"I don't care, and you seem to keep forgetting that. If I did care about him I wouldn't have said that I didn't! Would it make that much of a difference to me if I had have told you otherwise? Just out of interest, if I told you that I did care, would you act any differently to me? Would I wake up tomorrow feeling better than I did today?" I paused for a moment to give her at least a moment to catch up. "No! It makes no difference no matter what I say. And even if I am telling you this now, it wouldn't change your mind in the first place!" Now I was fully aware that everyone could hear me and were attempting to try and hide it. "So no matter what I say now, it makes no difference to the way you think about the situation. Do you believe me now?"

I turned and faced the door to Saria's, Syne's and my room. Wanting to be left alone to think. Rathe had stopped in her tracks, I didn't know if she was watching me walk back across the room, but I felt the eyes of Kurath, Zica and Kein permanently until I reached the corridor.

I continued straight through to the end room. I contemplated waiting just behind the first door and listening in on if anything else was said, but I passed the thought figuring that they would either be smart enough to drop the subject, or at least lower their voices to one I couldn't hear anyway. I jumped straight up onto Saria's bed and lay down immediately, my head hanging over the far edge as if I was to look over the cliff face of my old home. I knew for a fact that I would never return back there. Last time I believed the same thing and found my way back through... What happened to be... My... Error in judgement. And not a day goes by when I don't regret my decision to have the battle. But this time, I would force myself to remain passive. I wouldn't attack unless I was told it was ok. I wouldn't listen to Saria at any rate. But I would not be forced to leave this house. I-... I will not make the same mistake twice...

But what do I do? I want to right my wrongs but what step can I take to solve my problem? Life wouldn't let me just find an answer and tell me what to do. I couldn't just sit back and wait for something to happen to me. I couldn't do that. The only thing I have ever waited for was to be found again. But... That was different. It was a matter of principle. I couldn't have just lived the rest of my days up in the mountains being ignored by the world and shunned by all around me. Then I wouldn't be helping-

"Luyo?" I lifted my head up immediately and turned to face the voice. Finding Syne standing in the doorway, just looking at me. I remained silent, just waiting for him to say something or at least move from the doorway.

I lay still, watching the psychic type stare back at me. Minutes past and nothing was said. We just exchanged glances. No words were spoken.

He'll say something eventually. I'm sure he will. Why won't you say anything Syne! I shifted my forepaws slightly moving into a seated position as opposed to laying down. I thought about what might happen, what he could say, if he would say anything at all. Accessing any possible outcome of what he would say, and what I could say in return, thinking of every combination or excuse he could come u-... I stopped my thoughts. He didn't need an excuse. I was in the wrong. It's my fault that this is happening.

Why must this be so hard!

Syne flinched. His head recoiled slightly. The Espeon stepped into the room, stopping on his cushion. I followed him intently, wondering what was going on. "When did Kein teach you telepathy?"

What was he talking about? He didn't teach me anything... I only asked him last night after Rathe had given me the first of what had turned out to be many lectures. "What are you talking about?"

"You, just then. You spoke through your mind. Why would you ask me to teach you if you could do it on your own?"

"But I can't. I didn't." Did I? My mind was buzzing. Not only was it a surprise to actually see Syne talking to me, but now he wa-

"But you did. It was your voice. Maybe dark types have the ability innately also." Syne tilted his head to one side, perking his ears up a bit in the process. "Try it again."

"Try what again?"

"Whatever you did, do it again. You spoke using telepathy, now do it again."

I had no idea on what he was talking about. I didn't even know how I did it myself, if he was being truthful about the whole thing anyway. How can I do something I didn't even know possible? "I don't know..."

"You don't know what?"

"I don't know how I did it. Didn't you hear me the first time? I told you that I don't know how to speak telepathically, didn't you believe me? What would I get out-"

"Luyo, calm down. I heard your speech outside."

"So you know why I'm in here then."

"I can assume," It wasn't the first time I've heard that line. "but to prove that you can do it. What were you thinking of before? Just before I moved to here."

"I- I can't remember. It was... I was thinking of why you here. Why you followed me back here, and..." Why was this important? What would it prove? He is the one that is causing this, it's not like learnin-

"Stop." I stood up and turned around once, finding a comfortable spot on the bed and lay back down. "That's how you do it. You focus solely on who you want to speak to, then-" It's just a matter of thought.

"You're kidding me, right?" I placed my head in the cross of my paws. "It is that simple? That is all it is, that I have to do, if I want to speak with you telepathically?" Syne nodded slowly, as if not understanding what I was getting at. "And that, was supposed to take days for me to learn?"

"It's not as simple as you think Luyo."

"Oh really, it's not as easy as I made it seem. Then why was it so easy for me to do?"

Syne dropped his head slightly in thought, trying to figure out an answer for me, even if it might've been out of spite. "Because before you can speak to others you need to be able to concentrate only on them. Clearing your mind isn't an easy thing to do for a regular pokémon type. I can only assume that because dark types are the direct opposite to psychics that you already held such an ability. Or because you had spent so much of your time doing nothing but contemplating certain differences of what your life might've come across." He paused for a second to stand up and stretch out his legs. I watched his separated tail-ends twitch in complete opposite directions. "But that is only my opinion."

So that's it? That's all I have to do? Syne had a slight smirk across his face. "What's so funny?"

"If I were you I would practise the skill. Because right now, you look like you're having a nightmare to speak to me." I growled under my breath silently. Don't worry, it doesn't take long to master Luyo. "But as for the real reason I wanted to come in was because I wanted to apologise."

What? "You want to apologise?"

"Yes. It was my fault that this all happened because I refused to acknowledge your ask for me not to say anything on your behalf towards Saria. That you would speak for yourself when you learnt telepathy. Which was the exact reason why I came in now."

"So this has nothing to do with what I said out there?" There was a prolonged silence after I made the comment. Syne looked back towards the door and returned his eyes to me, if not for a moment, then continued to scan around the room. I had my eyes fixed on Syne, it was his question to answer. Either way, he just refused to look at me, which made me instantly think that something was wrong. "What? What is it?"

Syne sighed slightly, and shifted his position on the cushion so he was lying side on towards me. "I can say that I don't believe a word that you said, but that would get us no-where. I don't know whether or not it was the truth, but like you said, it wouldn't affect how I thought towards you in the end."

"So if what I said were true?"

"It would make a substantial difference in the future, but as for now, nothing would be to change."

"And if it weren't?"

"It would make a difference later. But not now." Syne stood up and took several steps towards the door. "Now it seems we need to get to know each other a little more. There needs to be an understanding between us if you are planning on staying here permanently."

"I guess we have some work to do then."

Syne nodded in agreement before stepping out the door and disappearing into the other room. It was a strange feeling I held during this time. I had a feeling that something should've been said, like I'd forgotten a detail on something I mentioned. But I guess that didn't matter, Everything I had set out to do yesterday managed to complete itself today. Or at least I think it did. I still thought it strange that he apologised when I was-

That was it, I should've apologised for striking him. Damn! Missed my chance. I made a note to myself to remember it later, maybe the reason I forgot was because he'd hidden it so well...

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