In the Service of Mystery (Pt. 24)
#31 of In the Service of Mystery
And we're back to Saturdays. Also this is the high point of a frankly pants week this week.
Aren't mothers wonderful?
As always, please feel free to leave comments and/or questions!
'I took that uniform off for the last time and went to the nearest pub and tried to drown out the memories.'
Silenced reigned once more; roughly, Harry wiped a paw across his eyes, dashing the wetness away. The lynx sat slumped forward, his face hidden by his paws - it was as if the entire weight of the world was pressing on his shoulders. There was little I could say that wasn't going to sound like some trite platitude. There is a depth of grief where all one can do is share in it, to be at the edges - simply to be present.
We sat on the wall, just looking across the garden. Harry began to fiddle with his tail, it always amazed me that he would just reach round and start picking at it; I was convinced he wasn't really aware that he was doing it. In the distance, the sound of the tolling of the church clock could be heard, three o'clock. The normal, everyday sounds of the village seemed alien and harsh to my ears. I blinked a couple of times and then shook my head.
The very idea that I would have to confront something that was pure evil was distasteful, to say the least. The events of the past days were whirling about in my mind, all overlaid with Harry's revelations about his career with the army. The possibility of something normal seemed to slipping away over the horizon. Two weeks ago, the idea of just spending a day tackling paperwork would have been a form of bureaucratic torture; now just the faintest glimmer of being able to do my admin would have been as welcome as a fortnight's holiday at the seaside.
My strange, paper-based day-dream was cut short by a noise from the back door. Looking round, I saw Anna standing on the step.
'Sorry, am I interrupting?'
I looked at Harry, who shook his head imperceptibly.
'No, not at all.'
'It's just that your mum said she wasn't going to drive back to the Borders tonight, and I've said I'd put her up.'
Even at one remove, my mother's ability to break the flow of my thoughts remained undimmed.
'Umm, right, okay.' I said, then I remembered Kiniun's advice. 'Anna, do you know anything about the Oxfold Estate?'
'A little, yes. I used to sneak in there when I was younger, drove mum wild.'
'What's this about, Nerd?' Harry asked, his voice sounding calmer.
I looked from Harry to Anna and back again.
'We need to get to where The Offering is happening, we have to stop this at its earthly source. You know, Harry, we spoke with Kiniun about it. So, Anna, do you have any idea where this is going to happen? Do my dreams of some temple-like building make any sense?'
Anna looked thoughtful, her eyes rather distant. Absently, she ran her paw through her whiskers and then scratched her ear.
'I think so...' She said at last, 'I always thought it was just a folly, or some kind of elaborate garden shed, but there is a building on the estate that looks like it's some kind of temple.'
I took a sharp breath.
'Could you describe it, love?'
Anna smiled at me, then closed her eyes.
'It's made of the same stone as the Hall.' She said, waving her paws vaguely. 'I suppose it's about fifteen feet tall, and is built into the hillside. There's a portico with columns in front of a big metal door.'
'I think that's the place. Where is it?'
'In the Estate, the hills between the Hall and the main road. I could show you more easily than giving you directions.'
'Would you?' This was from Harry.
Anna looked at him, then at me.
'Yes.' She said, the finality in her voice brooking no argument. 'What is happening in this village is wrong, so, yes I'll show you where to go.'
Harry grunted, he rolled his shoulders loosely and stood up. There was a look on his face that I had not seen in some years. It was a look with flint in it, I think the last time I had been treated to that look was when Brian Strix had fallen and broken a wing on our 'camping weekend' back in seminary. Harry had carried the owl for twelve miles back to the road and into a waiting ambulance. It was a look that cried out 'don't get in my way'.
'Good.' He said, a low growling tone in his voice. 'Those utter_bastards_ have got Gerald; I want to get him back safely.'
This was greeted with a mildly shocked stare from Anna, I suppose it was the first time she had heard him swear. It was nothing new to me, in seminary he would, quite literally 'swear like a trooper', adding some rather inventive curses that were peculiar to the Royal Tal Borderers to my vocabulary.
The rest of the afternoon went past in a blur of discussion and practicalities. Some things were more run of the mill, such as getting my mother over to Anna's house (she had clearly planned to stay the night, as there was a small suitcase in the back of her 4x4). Others were less normal, one conversation that sticks in my mind was with Kiniun:
'All of the rites call for incense, but how are we going to get a thurible and lit coals into this temple?'
'You're getting hung up on incidentals, Francis - the rites all expect that a priest will be able to perform the entire exorcism in a nice living room in someone's house. Concentrate on the important parts of the rite!'
'Such as?' I asked in frustration; by this point we had been batting details back and forth for the best part of an hour.
'What is the absolute heart and soul of any rite of the Church, Francis?'
'Prayer centred in and on the Risen Lord.' I answered, feeling like I was back in one of Father Lutra's apparently endless lectures - I could almost see the view out of the lecture theatre's window to the college church.
'Yes! Prayer!' Shouted Kiniun. 'The incense is secondary to the prayer. What you do need to take with you are the oils and the holy water. They are much more tangible elements of prayer, the touch of both will be repulsive to all of Satan's minions.'
'And, they're easier to carry about, I suppose.'
'Hmm... The portability of the items is not what I was worried about.'
And so the discussion wandered and meandered on, from the sublime to the ridiculous - apparently it is unsuitable to carry holy water in a sports bottle, but not so bad to wrap a silver holy oil-stock in a tea towel to stop it from making any noise. On and on went the discussion, Harry, Anna and my mother popping in and out of the study where we were sitting - more often than not carrying cups of tea and plates of biscuits. In the end, it was Harry that broke us up.
At about half past eight, he came in and sat down on the arm of Kiniun's chair.
'You two probably haven't noticed,' He began, 'But Theresa and Anna have gone and it is well past dinner time. Nerd, your mum told me to come and get the both of you - she and Anna are cooking dinner for all of us at Anna's place. Apparently, Kiniun cleaned out every ingredient he could find in your kitchen when he cooked lunch.'
Kiniun treated us to one of his huge, slow smiles - it was the kind of smile where every tooth seemed to get shown off. He scratched at one side of his mane, then said:
'I said Wildcat food is good, not that it was simple.'
'Come on, you two.' Said Harry. 'I want to see Nerd's girlfriend's house!'
Needless to say, I chucked a cushion at him, which he fielded with a graceful motion of a paw. He ruined the moment by sticking his tongue out at me. We all trooped out of the house and walked through the quiet of the Saturday evening.
It was another strangely quiet evening. From what I had heard, Rayton was normally quite busy in the summer with walkers and tourists; that evening, though, was as if the entire village was waiting. It was as if the place was, not exactly dormant, but lying, cat-like with one eye just open - waiting for the next move. A tension hung heavy in the air. I flinched as someone clanged the lid on a dustbin, it even caused Harry to cast around for the source of the sound.
I was glad to reach the safety of Anna's doorstep. Kiniun rang the bell and there came a loud rattling and clattering from the recesses of the house. Anna answered the door looking slightly... harassed. I grinned at her, knowing exactly what was going to follow:
'Has Theresa ever cooked with someone else in the kitchen before? I've given up trying to help and I'm just hiding in the dining room.'
'She does that, I'm afraid.' I winced as a crashing noise came from the direction of Anna's kitchen, followed by a sound that could only be described as roin-roin-roin as a pan lid rolled around on its edge. 'At least you know where I get my clumsiness from! And, don't worry, your kitchen will be spotless before dinner is even served.'
'I hope so; I'm just about pulling my fur out.' Said Anna, leaning against the newel post at the bottom of the stairs for support.
I dived past Anna and walked through into the kitchen. The little room was just as I had expected, a melee of one. My mother managed to apparently be in about three places at once, stirring, turning and prodding at things with knives. From the scant cover offered by the doorframe, I spoke:
'Mum, you appear to have taken Anna's kitchen over.'
'Oh, hello, love. We were cooking together, but she seems to have gone. Pass me that bowl.'
Reaching cautiously into the maelstrom I proffered a heavy earthenware bowl.
'Thanks, dear. You really must keep your kitchen better stocked.'
'Mum.'
She grinned at me, her mismatched eyes twinkling. She was loving the chance to be let loose in someone else's kitchen. It was that point that it struck me, I had (or something had) somehow involved my mother in the threat that was hanging over this village. Suddenly, there came a feeling of intense vulnerability: my mother, my closest friends, my parish, all at risk.
Quite slowly, I felt myself droop to the floor. In a detached and surprisingly analytical manner I watch how my hand paws broke my fall, and how the quarry-tiles of the floor had slight patterning in them. Gradually everything became dark, then silent. I remember hearing my mother's voice as if it were coming from some great distance: 'Francis...?'
That meddling priest, waving his scraps and tatters of Scripture and prayer as if they could save him. He is all puppyish expectation. Fool , I will show him my power; show him the weakness of his 'Saviour'. I shall expose the emptiness of his Church, the pointless nature of his obedience.
_ He will not bear the taunting. I will reach into the darkest corners of his mind, expose him to those things which he keeps hidden even from himself. What can he know of my power , can he stand seeing the death of his friends, again and again? How can he survive my wrath, the anger that will stretch seconds into hours?_
_ How dare he threaten my hold on this land? Through this weak and grubbing family (noble, they call themselves - Mairish mercenaries) I have driven his Church out of this place before. I drove them out when they were great, greater than he could possibly imagine. I sent those monks screaming for their lives, renouncing God. How can he hope to have victory over me? This cross-breed, this creature who can barely deserve to call himself a dog, he cannot stand not with this damaged old soldier and that ancient lion. He cannot stand me! I have sent berserkers into blood rages, brought kingdoms to their knees and seen the crumbling of empires that even history has forgotten!_
_ I will see him offer freely of his own soul, offer all that he has in my service. Priest, pah! I will offer him dreams and riches; delights and delicacies. I will hold his life in my talons and he will give it to me - this little priest's friends will be his downfall. He will give himself to my power to save his friends._
_ How could he resist? Thrones, dominions and powers are mine in the netherworld. This place is mine! He is but a speck, an insignificant fly-dropping; why, then, do I rage so at him? Can he be such a threat? See, he barely holds onto his life, barely aware, barely conscious. One touch of my mind has him cowering in a heap on the floor. See how weak he is._
_ Don't mind Francis, at least your Mummy is here. Don't worry Francis, Anna will hold you. Don't fear Francis, Kiniun will guide you. Don't fret Francis, that battle damaged lynx will fight for you. What pathetic rubbish!_
_ Don't mind Francis, I will take your mother from you. I will turn your Anna's paws against you. I will sever your link to your father through Kiniun. I will see that lynx laid bare, his flaws and cracks: so that you may know him truly._
_ Francis Shepherd, we will meet. You will stand before me with your worthless words and I will chant them back into your face. You will hear my mocking tones: 'Therefore, we adjure thee, unclean spirit, spectre from hell, satanic power...' You will become mine as I parrot your worthless, powerless words. _
_ _
The world seemed to wobble, the darkness before my eyes flickered. I felt as my body began to convulse, my legs thrashing, my paws clawing at unseen objects. It was as if my mind was slipping away from my control - the blackness that had engulfed my vision, the silence that had stopped my ears, as if it was engulfing my very soul. Then... nothing. I felt nothing, saw nothing, heard nothing, handled nothing. I could not feel my body, as if I had been stripped back to my consciousness, as if my soul had been laid bare.
I came to (came back?) lying on Anna's kitchen floor. I looked up into four worried faces, four sets of worried eyes and drooping ears. I blinked slowly and then tried to lever myself up from the floor. Harry put a paw on my chest and gently pushed me back into a prone position.
'You were out cold for a while, Nerd, just lie still. There's an ambulance on its way.'
By then, even speaking seemed like too much effort, so I was content to just lie there, my head propped on some rolled-up tea towels. Just seconds later, the quiet of the evening was split by the whooping of a siren. In my mildly dazed state, I found myself thinking: When did ambulances and police cars stop going nee-naw?
Soon, I had been loaded into the back of the ambulance and was undergoing a rather involved series of tests. It turns out that the Heart of Ironmont Ambulance Service had just begun to recruit doctors as well as paramedics and, therefore, I was having almost the full Accident and Emergency treatment.
'Do you have any idea why you might have blacked out, Father?' Asked the doctor.
'A demon from hell just tried to kill me.' Was what I didn't say. Instead, I shrugged.
'Well, you seem to be in generally good health, Father, so I don't think that you need to go to A&E...' She tailed off into silence and ran a paw over her face. Now that I was more with it, I noticed that the little dachshund doctor was worried.
'What is it, doctor?' I asked.
'...Just be careful, Father - there are some burst blood vessels in your eyes, it's probably nothing, but, just try not to strain yourself overmuch.'
'Okay.'
She flashed a little pocket torch across my face, causing me to wince. The doctor scribbled some notes on a pad.
'Good, thank you Father. Next time you feel the need to black out for no reason, make sure you phone us.'
I laughed, it seemed only polite. With assurances that my notes would be updated with my GP, I was returned to the house and the ambulance lumbered off. The little chorus of worried faces that greeted me caused me to burst out laughing.
'What?' Asked Harry.
'Nothing, really, it's just that you all have the same look on your faces.'
'Come in, Francis, your dinner's getting cold.'
'Thanks, Mum.'
While I had been in the back of the ambulance, everyone else, it appeared, had eaten, leaving me with my meal sitting under a layer of cling-film on the worktop. I was just reaching out to pick the plate up when Anna put a paw on my arm.
'You'll want to nuke that first.' She said.
'I'll. Want. To. Nuke. It.' I repeated, making quite sure that I had each word in the right place.
'Yes, you know, in the microwave.'
That came like the sunrise, everything slowly becoming clearer; the microwave, I still had to ask:
'Nuke it?'
'When Mum bought a microwave, apparently Grandma thought it was some kind of atomic device, I suppose it just stuck. Family weirdness.'
'Well, you've managed to survive my mother in your kitchen, and me having some kind of episode - you'll have to do better than that it you want to out weird me!'
The rest of the evening was as normal as we could make it. We even played a couple of board games, both of which I lost in spectacular fashion (even having resorted to blatant and obvious cheating). At about half past eleven, Harry, Kiniun and I left for the vicarage.
Despite the oppressive silence that still overshadowed the village, it was the first decent night's sleep I had been able to have in days.