FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

“A chance for a fresh start, a chance for a fresh start…” I murmured to myself as the washing machine began to fill with water. Alright, strictly speaking, the beginning wasn’t that bad. I’ve never gotten along well with felines, but this was a good opportunity to practice.

Earlier, when the washing machine at home broke, I brought a pile of dirty clothes to the dorm to wash. Thankfully, no one asked too many questions. Hmph, big cats are all simple-minded creatures anyway.

But speaking of troublesome creatures… Silent streaks of gray and white sorrow and blazing golden-red vitality streaked across the icy, dead forest of the night sky. This time, there was also… apples?

That unique, overwhelmingly powerful, and unmistakably familiar presence—just its appearance was enough to push me to the edge of an outburst. No, remember, this is a chance for a fresh start.

“This building has an elevator. Don’t tell me you climbed up the side?” I turned toward the source of the scent. A certain beast crouched on the low wall at the edge of the floor, its massive silhouette in the moonlight enough to intimidate any beast. Its glowing eyes looked my way before it spoke in a slow, deliberate voice.

“I figured you wouldn’t want your roommates to see me, so I climbed up along the pillars. Why are you washing clothes in the dark without turning on the lights?”

Its enormous white fangs gleamed faintly as it spoke. I could fully understand how others froze in place, overwhelmed by the sheer, crushing force of its presence.

“I thought you wouldn’t want to be seen by other beasts. If I turned on the lights, a giant gray wolf squatting on the edge of a tall building might attract some attention.” So you really did climb up! What were you thinking?! I tried to keep my voice steady, ignoring the inner tirade that was already boiling over, and responded calmly. He stayed silent for a while, as if contemplating something.

“If you don’t mind, I actually don’t dislike appearing in front of others,” he said with such tranquility, without a single ripple in his scent. Damn, he must have practiced just to deal with me. Every time you’re in public, you’re so tense, like you’re ready to fight or flee at any moment. Did you think I, like those oblivious beasts, wouldn’t notice? So now you’re adopting a low profile to accommodate me? Who do you think you are?! Damn it. No, a chance for a fresh start.

“Then I don’t mind either. I think it’s perfectly normal for us to interact with others, like any other beasts. There’s nothing to be concerned about.” Was this my honest opinion? Damn it, I didn’t even have time to think about whether this might lead to some unforeseen, regretful consequences. Am I really ready to give you another chance? Is this the resolve and price required for a fresh start?

“Hmm.” He responded briefly, his tail swaying gently. What?! Damn it, why are you wagging your tail?! That looks way too genuine to be fake. Should I wag my tail too? Damn it, my body’s too stiff. Wag, tail, wag! If I don’t wag it to disperse the tension, all my fur is going to bristle with rage. Wag!

“This is an apple. Make sure to buy some fruit for yourself. Also, I brought some hangers since it seems like you didn’t bring enough.” He handed over a paper bag. I muttered a response and took it from him. In the end, my tail only managed a stiff, awkward sway. How smooth. But when he saw my clumsy movements, his tail wagged even faster. Are you kidding me?! Are you happy to see your son struggling so hard to communicate with you?! Damn it, stay calm. Think about the apple.

I hate apples! You like them, but don’t assume I do! Besides, I’m pretty sure I’ve told you I hate apples. Were you even paying attention? I’ll buy my own fruit, thank you very much. And not only did I bring enough hangers, but you also shoved a bunch at me before I left. Now you’re giving me even more? Am I supposed to fill my closet with hangers hung on other hangers? Maybe I should hang myself in the closet too.

“Thanks.” Thanks?! Did I really just say that? Am I thanking you for giving me such strong willpower? Stop wagging your tail so happily!

“Hmm?” He tilted his head as if noticing something, trying to suppress his urge to sniff, but his nose wrinkled slightly, and his uninjured ear twitched twice. Damn it, could your expressions be any more readable? Relationships between canine fathers and sons are either particularly close or unbearably awkward—there’s no in-between.

“Did Hoshikaze mention the dinner to you?” Come on, at least pretend to be oblivious, my giant blue whale. To avoid mortifying situations like this, canine-specific cleaning products are designed with strong deodorizers. But I haven’t had a chance to properly shower since leaving Hoshikaze’s place.

“Yes, he told me his mother specifically invited me. I’ll be attending.” Through the moonlight, I could faintly make out his furrowed brows, the scar above his right eye looking even more menacing as it moved. So now you’re trying to look thoughtful? Please, wait until I’m embarrassed enough to disappear before putting on that epiphany face. I don’t want my last impression of this world to be that.

“I’ll try my best to attend. But the situation in Central City is a bit tense right now. Be careful out there. Something’s brewing, but I haven’t been able to find any solid leads, and it’s making me uneasy.” His voice remained calm as always, but I noticed his uninjured ear perk up and swivel backward.

“It’s fine. I know you’re busy. I wasn’t expecting us to attend the gathering together anyway.” Noticing his slightly worried expression, I picked up on the scent of blood—wolf blood.

“Next month is your eighteenth birthday. Want me to take you to the black market?” Such a private act carries immense significance among closely bonded wolves, but we’re not that close.

“No, I’ve already arranged it with Hoshikaze. He’ll take me.” He nodded at my response without saying more. But honestly, I’m not sure if showing up at the black market with either of you would cause more of an uproar—or escalate into outright panic. But why is there a smell of blood? Is he hurt? No, impossible. The blood is on the surface—on his fingertips and the tip of his nose. He must’ve knelt to examine the scent. It’s from the victim. A lot of blood. The kind where the body’s completely drained.

“The taxidermy case?” He nodded in response to my question.

“Stay safe. I’ll get in touch.” As he was about to leave, he suddenly paused, as if hesitating. Oh, mighty blue whale or T-Rex, hear my prayer—let some unlucky beast with its fur skinned alive distract him! I can’t handle his brewing epiphany expression!

“Take care of yourself.” He patted my head before leaping into the city’s dark alleys, merging seamlessly with Central City’s shadows. That was three stories high… If I didn’t know better, I’d think he chose a physical enhancement wish. If only that were true.

His warm touch lingered on my head, and my ears instinctively folded down. Damn you, traitors.

Take care of yourself? Don’t you think it’s a little late for that? Like, say, seventeen years late? No, that’s unfair. Strictly speaking, our relationship hit rock bottom when I turned twelve and my fur turned completely white—though it wasn’t particularly warm before that.

Five years later, I’d already grown used to this distance. Now you decide to fix our relationship? Damn it. I thought only Hoshikaze could make me feel this confused, unable to control my physical and emotional reactions. This strange disarray—are these even my own emotions? I knocked on my right temple, trying to steady my thoughts.

“A chance for a fresh start,” I muttered, the warmth still lingering.

“I want a chance for a fresh start.” So that’s what it feels like—so warm.

My thoughts finally calmed. I leaned against the low wall, looking toward where he disappeared. As the night deepened, fog began to rise, making the moonlight even hazier. The full moon truly was beautiful. Central City smelled the same as always— lonely, out of place, stark white, rigid, and sharply defined black. But amidst that familiar scent, there was a hint of warmth… and apples?

“This will be a chance for a fresh start.”