What Can Be Made of the Shrapnel
Wrote this after going through a rough few months and getting through what I thought was the worst of it last year. This year and the following months taught me otherwise but life isn’t all rough patches and I like to think this poem reflects that at least a little. It’s about battles where we get stuck in the middle, trust and protecting ourselves. It can be hard but there’s still moments of peace between the battles when you and the world let there be. Originally posted in June 2023.
What Can Be Made of the Shrapnel
By: A.X. Bueno
Been caught in the crossfire of a lot of battles
Especially lately for reasons that don’t feel like they matter
As much as the scars left once the ceasefire is declared
Practically always by someone other than me after a time
They’ll deal with the results of it all in their own ways and me in mine
Usually from the sidelines as I clean up shrapnel and scars
Sometimes there’s a knife or more fire that comes directly my way
Whether it’s from the side, front or behind depends on the fight and the day
That leaves me needing to protect myself from unexpected or unfortunately timed blows
There’s not much around but the shrapnel though
So I use the resources I have and fashion that into a sort of armor
The best protection I can muster to prevent future wounds and scars
It’s not ideal but then again so few things are
When I’m just trying to make it through
With scars that I don’t want to risk letting out in the open
Which makes it harder for them to close
And harder to just relax and breathe
Yet you can’t always cling to safety and the security in being alone
You’ve got to take off that armor sometimes and not let the past drag you down
It’s not easy shaking off the past and leaving those remnants behind
To let the battles go to find some piece of mind
Because the intensity, the frequency of them can vary but they do eventually end
I’ll take the moments of calm when I can to take the armor off from time to time
To feel like I can rest by myself or with friends and not risk getting left in the shaken up dust
I just wish I didn’t feel like I needed this armor to begin with
But enough experience has taught me to keep it either close or on
Maybe someday I can take it off and be free enough to let it sit and rust